I was born and raised in San Jose, about an hour south of SF. My wife was born and raised about an hour south of Philly. We both grew up in suburbs.
We visit her hometown 2-3x a year. Her family always asks about how different it must feel to me to be in East Coast culture. I usually play along and share the subtle differences I notice like referring to a type of sandwich as a sub vs a hoagie, or different but similar brands of food at the grocery store. But all-and-all where we grew up is very similar (her town is a little more conservative, mine a little more liberal).
Now I've been to New York City and difference are a little more striking, but a suburb on the west is like a suburb on the east. But I was feeling something different that I've noticed every time I've been there but could never quite place it. I finally realized what it was: the neighborhood.
Everyone in the neighborhood knows each other. Where I'm from, you know your immediate neighbors and the people across the street. In her neighborhood, We'd walk for blocks and blocks and she'd know everyone in every house just about.
When we went to dinner the restaurant was filled to the brim. The bar area was standing room only. But when we entered like 20 people greeted her family with hugs and by name.
When we went to the bank the teller knew not only many of the people in line by name, but asked about their children by name.
I went for a beard trim at the Barber shop. As I was waiting people would walk in and everyone would greet them. On more than one occasion one of the barbers would say, "You here for a cut" and the patron would say "No. just stopping by" or "just hanging out."
It's not like she lives in a small town. There's no way she knows everyone in town, but the neighborhood knows each other. It's nice. Never experienced anything like it where I live.
We visit her hometown 2-3x a year. Her family always asks about how different it must feel to me to be in East Coast culture. I usually play along and share the subtle differences I notice like referring to a type of sandwich as a sub vs a hoagie, or different but similar brands of food at the grocery store. But all-and-all where we grew up is very similar (her town is a little more conservative, mine a little more liberal).
Now I've been to New York City and difference are a little more striking, but a suburb on the west is like a suburb on the east. But I was feeling something different that I've noticed every time I've been there but could never quite place it. I finally realized what it was: the neighborhood.
Everyone in the neighborhood knows each other. Where I'm from, you know your immediate neighbors and the people across the street. In her neighborhood, We'd walk for blocks and blocks and she'd know everyone in every house just about.
When we went to dinner the restaurant was filled to the brim. The bar area was standing room only. But when we entered like 20 people greeted her family with hugs and by name.
When we went to the bank the teller knew not only many of the people in line by name, but asked about their children by name.
I went for a beard trim at the Barber shop. As I was waiting people would walk in and everyone would greet them. On more than one occasion one of the barbers would say, "You here for a cut" and the patron would say "No. just stopping by" or "just hanging out."
It's not like she lives in a small town. There's no way she knows everyone in town, but the neighborhood knows each other. It's nice. Never experienced anything like it where I live.
