Urban Legend: children stealing gold???

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by WARRIOR POET, May 16, 2014.

  1. WARRIOR POET

    WARRIOR POET Banned Banned

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    I don't know if anyone has seen this, but i have been going through some clippings over the past year from various newspapers at the public library.

    It seems that there is some wise man who is going around placing nuggets of gold to benefit all who can claim them. He places so many gold nuggets that the lucky people who find them have more than enough to share with each other. This good Samaritan has been doing this for over a decade.

    it seems that lately all this has changed. There have been various reports and blurry photos of a mutant breed of children with power they cannot handle are going around stealing the nuggets before those in need can claim them.

    it seems like these mutant children with power they are not ready for are not even keeping the gold nuggets and using them to improve society or even their own lives. they are just throwing the nuggets in the hole in Centralia, PA where the underground coal fires were started.

    now, from the descriptions from eye witnesses who were brave enough to talk to reporters (even risking their lives in doing so) it seems the mutant children look like this:
    [​IMG]
    *** artist rendition

    what is most bizarre about the children, yes, even more bizarre than throwing away suck precious nuggets of gold that people could improve their lives with, is apparently, the mutant children never grow up and become sexually mature. this is an artist rendition of what the mutants look like under the covers

    [​IMG]

    Doctor Menotrul is quoted as saying "with the evidence, it is unlikely that the mutant children will ever be able to reproduce or even have sex. so they are not much of a threat after they die off in a few years. They will just naturally die out."


    update: since i have written this I have found a hidden camera in my bathroom. i think they mutant children are on to me.
    all the news papers from the libraries were mysteriously burned
    the eye witnesses who spoke up have since recanted their testimony

    Doctor Menotrul has been relocated to Detroit by the man pictured below, who i believe to be the human ring leader of these mutant children
    [​IMG]


    so if you hear the pitter patter of little feet be afraid . . . be very afraid

    shhh, i hear them. the little feet. they are breaking down the door.
     
  2. Elmonstro1

    Elmonstro1 Bones Nose

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    Wtf did i just read
     
  3. Madmick

    Madmick Cerebrage Staff Member Senior Moderator

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    So what movie are you pitching, sweetheart?
     
  4. MadSquabbles500

    MadSquabbles500 Steel Belt

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    Pray tell you have firearms.

    This is why we all should have the right to bear as much guns as we can. If mutant gold thieving children are real, think of all the other ghouls out there that could also be real. How are we going ot protect ourselves and families.? The cops take 10 mins to answer a call man.
     
  5. The Clinch

    The Clinch Middle-Earth with Glee-Glop and the Floopty-Doos. Platinum Member

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    Never heard of them.
     
  6. Spinjira

    Spinjira Green Belt

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    Midgets steal gold, children do not.
     
  7. Bukowski82

    Bukowski82 Buckle up belt

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    TS doesn't believe in Science, but is all over a legend of mutant children stealing nuggets of gold?

    This is my shocked face.
     
  8. Noob

    Noob ............ Banned

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    Delete
     
  9. Bukowski82

    Bukowski82 Buckle up belt

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    Signed
     
  10. WARRIOR POET

    WARRIOR POET Banned Banned

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    so, your theory is that they are not even children, but midgets born without genitalia who are stealing the gold from normal people because of their hatred of the normals and their ability to sexually repoduce

    i think this is a good angle
     
  11. WARRIOR POET

    WARRIOR POET Banned Banned

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    I do believe in science. i also believe that you cannot tell how much something weighs by measuring it with a yard stick
     
  12. A.A. Riggs

    A.A. Riggs SAXOPHONE

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    But, kid, first ya gotta tell me: who is the lead actress and how much do I wanna bang her?
     
  13. GODZILLA213

    GODZILLA213 Genocide Revised

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    This is going places..........
     
  14. WARRIOR POET

    WARRIOR POET Banned Banned

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    I am thinking Elizabeth Olsen
    [​IMG]

    this guy has shown interest also. much interest

    [​IMG]
     
  15. MortalWombat

    MortalWombat Vombatus Sherdoggus

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    Great thread, much better than usual in my opinion. Thanks, WP.
     
  16. WARRIOR POET

    WARRIOR POET Banned Banned

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    here are some off set pics from movie
    [​IMG]
     
  17. WARRIOR POET

    WARRIOR POET Banned Banned

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    Allegory: The Movie
     
  18. MortalWombat

    MortalWombat Vombatus Sherdoggus

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    Oh shit, really? Mods are the children?
     
  19. WARRIOR POET

    WARRIOR POET Banned Banned

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    interesting theory.

    i am pretty stupid and thought it was just some mashup of Village of the Damned and The Brood
     
  20. MortalWombat

    MortalWombat Vombatus Sherdoggus

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    Hush hush, eh? I know, I understand. :wink: Mashup. Brood. Damned.
     

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