UFC Year in Review -- in haiku!

[Tamburlaine]

So a couple of years ago I started a haiku thread over Xmas, and there was a fair bit of interest. (It got to 50-some pages.) So I'll start it again this year.

Mods: I know you'll wasteland it eventually, but howsabout giving it a week or two first, please? It's all in good fun.

The rules:

1. Must address UFC news & events in 2012.
2. Must be written in haiku form: 3 lines total; 5 syllables in first line, 7 syllables in second line, 5 syllables in third line.

For example:

Condit lands a kick
And my heart leaps to my throat:
I thought Georges was done

or

Can't decide what's worse:
One-fifty-one cancelled or
Calgary wasn't

or

Gotta love BJ
In the best shape of his life
Again. And loses.

Let's see some creativity, Sherdoggers!

 

[hendosan]

I like to watch fights
Oh no "X" has been injured
This card is ruined

 

[Tamburlaine]

Here's a link to my last go at this. Some of them are GREAT.

http://www.sherdog.net/forums/f44/haiku-thread-1199717/

 

[JohnnyDrama]

One Drink To Many
He Lost His Drivers License
But Didn't Lose His Belt

 

[Tamburlaine]

One Drink To Many
He Lost His Drivers License
But Didn't Lose His Belt

The force is strong with you... I was trying to figure out a way to work "Bentley" into a haiku. Was that this year or last, though? This is as much a memory test as a haiku test!

 

[JohnnyDrama]

this year

 

[Tamburlaine]

this year

It seems like so much
has happened since then; Vitor's
near sub blinded me!

 

[Blazen]

ultimate fighter
Oh why must you struggle on?
great run - rest in peace

 

[Natman2939]

first year without him;
since two thousand eight, so sad;
brock lesnar is gone

 

[Tamburlaine]

first year without him;
since two thousand eight, so sad;
brock lesnar is gone

Look, let's be honest:
Brock was all hype and bad tats.
Signed, Cain Velasquez.

Hey, don't get crazy:
That Lesnar dude was a beast!
Yours truly, Frank Mir.

 

[AndreDGiant4eva]

Matt Brown rose from dead
What fools among you thought that
Immortals could die

Female judo champ
Armbars her way to stardom
Milks it like cow porn

The new breed fighters
May defeat the old lions
But they can't finish

 

[OnePunchMan]

Throws drinks at dumb girls
Throws fighters on their dumb heads
He gives zero fucks




This one goes out to Khabilov.

 

[Tamburlaine]

Matt Brown rose from dead
What fools among you thought that
Immortals could die

Female judo champ
Armbars her way to stardom
Milks it like cow porn

The new breed fighters
May defeat the old lions
But they can't finish

I can't explain why
I laughed out loud at your post.
Must have been "cow porn"

 

[rampageSmackson]

He's back in Japan!?
And he even lands a slam!?
False alarm just retire

 

[Tamburlaine]

Sonnen didn't cheat:
He just guzzles his own blood
To get TRT.

 

[Natman2939]

Look, let's be honest:
Brock was all hype and bad tats.
Signed, Cain Velasquez.

Hey, don't get crazy:
That Lesnar dude was a beast!
Yours truly, Frank Mir.

Well played! But strangely, i feel if asked, Cain would say very good things about Brock. Despite the shortness of the fight, i think it was physically harder for him than people realize (like...he's never been taken down like that, he's never been put on the defense before, ect)

but good job

 

[OnePunchMan]

Rode horse to Dana
Killed the horse then ate it raw
Horsemeat not allowed?

 

[PRIDEoftheUFC**]

I like to watch fights
Oh no "X" has been injured
This card is ruined

Lol, first post nailed it. Well done

 

[Tamburlaine]

Well played! But strangely, i feel if asked, Cain would say very good things about Brock. Despite the shortness of the fight, i think it was physically harder for him than people realize (like...he's never been taken down like that, he's never been put on the defense before, ect)

but good job

I don't disagree.
I was just too damn lazy
To fit "Overeem"!

 

[mxkey]

MMA is my favorite sport
Anderson Silva is the greatest fighter of all time
Fuck math