- Joined
- Jul 3, 2010
- Messages
- 49,145
- Reaction score
- 31,084
Sigh...
What a sad, sad, miserable piece of shit.
So this was the heralded return of M. Night Shyamalan to his thriller twist roots...
I can say with no reservations that of all the Shyamalan films, this is the one I would least want to watch again. I would actually rather re-watch The Last Airbender or After Earth than ever sit through The Visit a second time. And that is saying a lot. Because I utterly despise those two films.
This was M. Night Shyamalan's Desperation: The Movie. It was the film equivalent of a recently divorced housewife crying her way through an intro video for a dating site.
M. Night does "found footage." If I hadn't known this was Shyamalan, I would have 100% believed you if you told me it was from the makers of any of the Paranormal Activity films.
The dialogue made up one of the worst scripts I have seen played out in recent memory. Boy = white rapper. Girl = avid filmmaker. Boy's lines = pop culture references. Girl's lines = filmmaking jargon.
M. Night has resorted to found footage and pop culture references. What a miserable experience. It felt like he was uneasy, nervous and shaken putting this whole thing together.
Characters were hanging onto their cameras and filming everything long past the point where they would have dropped their cameras and shit their pants. The bloody villains started picking up the cameras and filming things.
Shyamalan had no idea what he was even going for. That whole message in the end about forgiveness with the Mom's confessional about how she left her parents? Who cares? That had nothing to do with the actual movie we just watched. Why is it the entire denouement?
Kid rapping through the end credits... Yay, one last visit to that great rapping thing that we all loved throughout the whole movie, that rapping that really invested me in that kid's character, that I hoped I would get to see one last time.
As terrible as After Earth and Airbender were, at least if I ever had to sit through them again, they are visually interesting. This was a script on par with or even worse than those, and it looked terrible.
People had some good things to say about this movie so I was rooting for Shyamalan here and wanted to like this.
So much worse than I was expecting.
3 / 10.
Come at me, M. Night Juggalos.
What a sad, sad, miserable piece of shit.
So this was the heralded return of M. Night Shyamalan to his thriller twist roots...
I can say with no reservations that of all the Shyamalan films, this is the one I would least want to watch again. I would actually rather re-watch The Last Airbender or After Earth than ever sit through The Visit a second time. And that is saying a lot. Because I utterly despise those two films.
This was M. Night Shyamalan's Desperation: The Movie. It was the film equivalent of a recently divorced housewife crying her way through an intro video for a dating site.
M. Night does "found footage." If I hadn't known this was Shyamalan, I would have 100% believed you if you told me it was from the makers of any of the Paranormal Activity films.
The dialogue made up one of the worst scripts I have seen played out in recent memory. Boy = white rapper. Girl = avid filmmaker. Boy's lines = pop culture references. Girl's lines = filmmaking jargon.
M. Night has resorted to found footage and pop culture references. What a miserable experience. It felt like he was uneasy, nervous and shaken putting this whole thing together.
Characters were hanging onto their cameras and filming everything long past the point where they would have dropped their cameras and shit their pants. The bloody villains started picking up the cameras and filming things.
Shyamalan had no idea what he was even going for. That whole message in the end about forgiveness with the Mom's confessional about how she left her parents? Who cares? That had nothing to do with the actual movie we just watched. Why is it the entire denouement?
Kid rapping through the end credits... Yay, one last visit to that great rapping thing that we all loved throughout the whole movie, that rapping that really invested me in that kid's character, that I hoped I would get to see one last time.
As terrible as After Earth and Airbender were, at least if I ever had to sit through them again, they are visually interesting. This was a script on par with or even worse than those, and it looked terrible.
People had some good things to say about this movie so I was rooting for Shyamalan here and wanted to like this.
So much worse than I was expecting.
3 / 10.
Come at me, M. Night Juggalos.
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