The Hobbit- why do all the huge heavily armoured orcs have glass jaws?

[jmac98]

Watched the third part of the Hobbit, Bard's kid kills them with ease, one arrow from any bow ko's them, and the dwarf guy from the iron hills headbutts them tenderly and they peacefully die.

This is what you find non believable about these films?

 

[Basil**]

The orcs are all Overeem clones in cosplay

 

[Real_Magi]

cuz the hobbit series is shit

Exactly. The fuckign movies are horrible. The book is decent, but they deviated from the original book and added a bunch of shit from the lore, as well as focusing on making it completely action driven and just generally watering the story down to appeal to retards that get off on "transformers-esque" movies.

The orcs die easily to the heroes for the same reason the Stormtroopers always miss the heroes in Star Wars. It wouldn't make for much of a movie if the heroes were all killed in the first skirmish in which they were outnumbered.

It could make for an excellent story actually, if done correctly. Look at Game of Thrones. You can tell an excellent story that has realistic happenings and situations -- i.e. having characters die that would realistically die.

 

[Real_Magi]

Pretty sure they did in the book too.

If I remember correctly, they were actually captured and the goblin king was about to promptly bite all of their heads off until Gandalf showed up and helped them all escape. I don't think they fought through them, but actually used magic and such to simply escape.

 

[Hurricane Brad]

It could make for an excellent story actually, if done correctly. Look at Game of Thrones. You can tell an excellent story that has realistic happenings and situations -- i.e. having characters die that would realistically die.

You can certainly have more realistic stories in a fantasy setting, but it doesn't really work with movies like the Hobbit/LOTR or Star Wars. They are all about a group of heroes prevailing against overwhelming odds, which is intrinsically unrealistic.

 

[CaptHANDSUP]

Avengers has the shitauri
Middle-Earth has the orcs
Star Wars prequels have droids

pretty much an enemy so succeptible to death so the director can shove as much cool cgi action shit in as possible

By far the worst one was avengers. It was wspecially shitty because there was a normal ass **** (scarlett johannson) that was pretty much as good as iron man

 

[Adamant]

Because Peter Jackson sucks?

 

[Cyke_out]

By far the worst one was avengers. It was wspecially shitty because there was a normal ass **** (scarlett johannson) that was pretty much as good as iron man

Avengers is bad since they only added infantry troops for people like cap, widow and hawkeye to fight so they wouldn't be completely outclassed. Really, ironman, Thor and hulk could have handled everything.

It's gonna be the same in avengers 2. Ultron will be fighting the heavyweights while his minions give the more normal characters something to do.

 

[AgentOrange24]

SPOILERS If you clicked this thread and didn't see the film GTFO anyways but again SPOILERS

I didn't like this last one at all, what a waste of time. And the end was just fucking hilarious, I've seen all the LOTR movies and god damn, every damn battle ends with an unknown army coming out of nowhere to help. This shit happens every fucking time.

Especially those big birds man, they save them their asses so many times it's unreal. Them birds are obviously the best army there is in the LOTR universe, yet they ain't get no air time at all.

Homie Gandalf could just call them up before every battle and win all them wars easy peasy. Ninja a fucking drama queen doe.

Seriously tho, is it like that in the books too, can't really remember. If so that's very lame...

The last thing Bilbo sees in the book is the Eagles, then he gets hit with a rock and knocked out.

They do come, but their impact isn't as much as say, Beorn, who actually kills Bolg, and is on the screen for 5 seconds.

 

[ufcfan4]

i was watching that 70 minute review of the phantom menace and there was one thing that stood out when the guy talks about how all this crap is going on on the screen,

the original star wars had 1 on 1 light saber battles, whereas the new ones have like 75 jedis running around and all these robots and shit,

the 1 on 1 battles of the original star wars were way better! nowadays movies just fill the screen up with too much shit (i feel old) but i'd much rather have like a significantly less amount of orcs that are much harder to beat. would be more entertaining

like maybe there would be one scene, where like bilbo and 4 other weaklings are able to take down 1 orc by repeatedly hitting him with rocks u know

Yeah good call with Star Wars- I think hands down the best lightsaber battle in that franchise is Luke vs. Vader in Empire Strikes Back. It's nowhere near as flashy or fast paced as other top ones in the franchise (Maul, Anakin/Kenobi, Luke/Vader II) but it sure as hell doesn't have to be. The atmosphere alone is just off the charts. You feel the stakes. It's not always just the fight choreography that makes these things work. It's the storytelling.

I kind of envy people who saw Empire Strikes Back the first time around. There just have been such a sense of "shit just got real"-ness as soon as Vader confronted Luke in the Cloud City.

 

[carebear**]

Pretty sure the hobbits and dwarfs would piss hot.
Cheating bastards, no way they are clean.
The Orcs are like Bisping always getting the juiced up fighters.

 

[carebear**]

I always wondered why stormtroopers wore all that cumbersome armor when it could stop a shot from the smallest of blasters or even absorb the punishment of a little rock flung by 3 foot tall teddy bear.

Dude... We are tougher than we look. All of us!

 

[aus101]

The ineptitude of the orcs and invincibility of the good guys are the worst elements of all LOTR movies.

The orcs in return of the king seem more deadly than the soldiers of minas tirith (armoured in full plate), which was something I never liked.

 

[Doughbelly]

Orcs are all strength and aggression with little skill or brains to match.
How about storm troopers? They're supposed to be an army of Jango Fetts and they drop like flies. And don't get me started on the Foot Clan...

It's called the Law of Inverse Ninja. Orcs are like ninja and stormtroopers and all other nameless, faceless mooks - there is only a finite supply of badassary and it is spread out among the bad guys because ninjas are conserved. 1 ninja, 10 ninja, 100 ninja, it doesn't matter. If they're a part of the bad guy unit, they all have the same amount of ninja. One ninja assaulting a police station is going to fuck some shit up. On the other hand, each individual ninja of a 10 ninja unit only has 1/10th of the ninja.

Think about it. Why do you think the plural of ninja is ninja?

 

[windkick]

Evangeline Lilly would get the chorizo.

 

[>>jonutarr>]

cos it's real

 

[MikeHammer**]

Avengers is bad since they only added infantry troops for people like cap, widow and hawkeye to fight so they wouldn't be completely outclassed. Really, ironman, Thor and hulk could have handled everything.

It's gonna be the same in avengers 2. Ultron will be fighting the heavyweights while his minions give the more normal characters something to do.

And that could be easily addressed by giving Widow and Hawkeye and Cap, some phase 2 augmented weaponry.

 

[Viva]

cuz the hobbit series is shit

First post nailed it.

Those films are glossy garbage.

 

[Tamriel Terror]

i feel like orcs should pwn everyone.

 

[Tug]

The people that kill them with ease are heroes with higher skill and stength than regular humans/dwarves/elves

Also the orcs have poor training and discipline.

Saw this recently at the cinema. Fucking boring film. One long pointless fight