The 2018 Job Application

RockstarChris

Dwight Belt
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Im just gonna vent here on sherdog because I have earned at least that much over the last decade. I want a job. I havent had a real job in over a decade. I was the #1 prom dress salesman in the world for like 2 years. yea make jokes and laugh. I also managed a store at Sports Authority and they went down the drain. Before that I worked at Blockbuster.....

The point is. I dont understand why all these companies keep hiring idiots when crazy people like me are standing right here. Oh a bird brb
 
Sounds like you need the gift of a 1000 uppercuts to knock you into the present day.
 
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You need to build winning combat robots and win that championship money
 
Start making money online bro. I have an ebook you can buy (50% discount for Sherdog) which will teach you all you need to know to start making money.
 
Truck drivers

Online tutors for Chinese students

Employee at a senior center (flex hours)

That's all I see in the current job market.
 
Try stripping. Or maybe the guitat
 
Did you work anywhere that didn’t fail horribly?

I’m left to speculate you brought down these Titans of industry by your work performance alone.TS
 
They are going to ask why haven't you had any employment for the past 10 years. What's your response?
 
They are going to ask why haven't you had any employment for the past 10 years. What's your response?

I'd go with you were raising a child, or taking care of a sick family member. Almost anything else is going to bring the hippo eyes.
 
You're old. Retailers want to hire young people and pay them minimum wage, not you.
 
Have you tried latex sales?...maybe the importing/exporting business?...
 
There are around 1500 different food delivery companies these days, try that. Some people I know make $20/hour or more and it's super easy
 
Unemployment is crazy low, tons of companies are having difficulties finding people to work because the market is so strong.
 
I'd go with you were raising a child, or taking care of a sick family member. Almost anything else is going to bring the hippo eyes.
Even those bring the hippo eyes.

Ten years is way too long to take care of a family member, and the fact that you're a guy makes it harder to believe that you stayed home with the kids.

I know there are lots of stay at home dads out there but they are still the minority.

So 75% chance you're lying about being a stay at home dad.

98% chance you're lying about taking care of a family member for 10 years.

100% chance that you've got some underlying issue that makes you unemployable and I would regret hiring you.
 
Even those bring the hippo eyes.

Ten years is way too long to take care of a family member, and the fact that you're a guy makes it harder to believe that you stayed home with the kids.

I know there are lots of stay at home dads out there but they are still the minority.

So 75% chance you're lying about being a stay at home dad.

98% chance you're lying about taking care of a family member for 10 years.

100% chance that you've got some underlying issue that makes you unemployable and I would regret hiring you.

I was trying to give the man some hope...I honestly don't know what you could say in that situation.

<DCrying>
 
You’ve got to put the work in online.

These days it’s important. Get on linked in, go watch some YouTube videos on how to make a good linked in profile.

There is a free week long linked in profile prep course for job searching that my g/f just started doing. It’s pretty good.

You have got to put the work in.
 
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