The 2018 Job Application

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by RockstarChris, Aug 20, 2018.

  1. RockstarChris Dwight Belt Banned

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    Im just gonna vent here on sherdog because I have earned at least that much over the last decade. I want a job. I havent had a real job in over a decade. I was the #1 prom dress salesman in the world for like 2 years. yea make jokes and laugh. I also managed a store at Sports Authority and they went down the drain. Before that I worked at Blockbuster.....

    The point is. I dont understand why all these companies keep hiring idiots when crazy people like me are standing right here. Oh a bird brb
     
  2. Fraz WATP

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    Sounds like you need the gift of a 1000 uppercuts to knock you into the present day.
     
  3. tonil Red Card

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  4. loyalyolayal Steel Belt

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    The comic artist probably didn't know about internships. And like real jobs, smarter students gets into prestigious companies more often than not.
     
  5. Clippy Do I amaze you?

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    You need to build winning combat robots and win that championship money
     
  6. meauneau Brown Belt

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    Start making money online bro. I have an ebook you can buy (50% discount for Sherdog) which will teach you all you need to know to start making money.
     
  7. Fluffernutter Silver Belt

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    Truck drivers

    Online tutors for Chinese students

    Employee at a senior center (flex hours)

    That's all I see in the current job market.
     
  8. tmnpothead Teenage Mutant Ninja Pothead

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    Try stripping. Or maybe the guitat
     
  9. Headkicktoleg Titanium Belt

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    you can always grow beets
     
  10. NoGoodNamesLeft Red Belt

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  11. PlayswellwithLawnDarts Banned Banned

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    Did you work anywhere that didn’t fail horribly?

    I’m left to speculate you brought down these Titans of industry by your work performance alone.TS
     
  12. boingyman If can, can. If no can, no can.

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    They are going to ask why haven't you had any employment for the past 10 years. What's your response?
     
  13. Krixes The Undefeated Gaul Platinum Member

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    I'd go with you were raising a child, or taking care of a sick family member. Almost anything else is going to bring the hippo eyes.
     
  14. blaseblah Steel Belt

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    You're old. Retailers want to hire young people and pay them minimum wage, not you.
     
  15. Jim Cozad Jr. Banned Banned

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    Have you tried latex sales?...maybe the importing/exporting business?...
     
  16. Only Here for Attachments Stipe Justice Warrior

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    There are around 1500 different food delivery companies these days, try that. Some people I know make $20/hour or more and it's super easy
     
  17. PG29 red0 Jr Brown Belt

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    Unemployment is crazy low, tons of companies are having difficulties finding people to work because the market is so strong.
     
  18. Fedorgasm Silver Belt

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    Even those bring the hippo eyes.

    Ten years is way too long to take care of a family member, and the fact that you're a guy makes it harder to believe that you stayed home with the kids.

    I know there are lots of stay at home dads out there but they are still the minority.

    So 75% chance you're lying about being a stay at home dad.

    98% chance you're lying about taking care of a family member for 10 years.

    100% chance that you've got some underlying issue that makes you unemployable and I would regret hiring you.
     
  19. Krixes The Undefeated Gaul Platinum Member

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    I was trying to give the man some hope...I honestly don't know what you could say in that situation.

    <DCrying>
     
  20. 90 50 Gold Belt

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    You’ve got to put the work in online.

    These days it’s important. Get on linked in, go watch some YouTube videos on how to make a good linked in profile.

    There is a free week long linked in profile prep course for job searching that my g/f just started doing. It’s pretty good.

    You have got to put the work in.
     

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