Taking pleasure in the suffering of another human

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by Fedorgasm, Jul 28, 2016.

  1. Fedorgasm

    Fedorgasm Silver Belt

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    When I was young and single I was in love with this girl and she rejected me.

    She was very nice about it, but of course it was still painful.

    Fast forward many years and I find her online online. I check her profile and she looks even better than she did back then, and is married to a super successful guy that makes way more money than me, and is probably a better human being as well.

    So of course I feel like shit because it appears as if she made the right choice by rejecting me, because her life looks perfect.

    Well fast forward again, now it turns out that the husband was a habitual cheater and jerk and they got divorced. Now she has to raise a bunch of small kids by herself, and has been contacting me a lot, kinda exploring whether I'm available and still interested. I'm neither.


    Now this girl has never been anything but nice to me, and I once had very strong feelings for her, and yet...


    I can't help it, man, I've been smiling all day. Just the feeling of knowing that she actually made the wrong choice and knowing full well that she realizes it now brings me so much happiness, even though she's suffering. I really do feel bad for her, but at the same time, I feel good about myself.

    Do you guys think this is normal or am I a psychopath?
     
  2. ajwbjj87

    ajwbjj87 Black Belt

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    It's probably not the best outlook but I'm he same way with a couple ladies from the past. It's human nature I'm hoping
     
  3. IloveTHIS

    IloveTHIS Humble Narcissist

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    ehhhh, if someone lacks awareness and cant tell that their partner isn't the dreamboat they thought its hard to feel sorry for them. I can say for 1000% fact my woman would never do me like that.
     
  4. J. Bernie Cunningham

    J. Bernie Cunningham Banned Banned

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    You're a crappy human being but hey, you're not alone there.

    Never take pleasure in any suffering, it creates horrible cycles of hate that better noone.
     
  5. BisexualMMA

    BisexualMMA Don't Put My Name in the Name of Steroids!

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    Do you like what? Break up in a mature way and be nice about it?
     
  6. EmpireShallFall

    EmpireShallFall Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    I had this girlfriend that I was head over heels for. Well she ended up breaking up with me. I saw her for the first time in years and she is fat now. :eek::cool:
     
  7. Fedorgasm

    Fedorgasm Silver Belt

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    And did that make you happy?
     
  8. EmpireShallFall

    EmpireShallFall Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    I was mostly shocked. Seeing her and her slob boyfriend made me lol.
     
  9. BayAreaGuy

    BayAreaGuy Good Day

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    I think it's normal.

    I also think it's your minds way of boosting your self-esteem, to preserve your self-value because you were somehow the better choice.

    Otherwise, if everyone always felt terrible about the misfortunes of others, then this world would be filled with depression and sorrow, because there's always misfortune. The bottom line is, and as horrible as this may seem, you can't feel bad for everyone. Empathy and compassion is one thing, but if you allowed yourself to feel the pain of others, you'd be in a constant state of horrible feelings.

    btw, listen to the songs on the radio. Loads of breakup songs about wishing ill towards the other person in a past relationship. What does that tell you? Those songs never go out of style because people enjoy listening to those sorts of lyrics.
     
  10. WorldofWarcraft

    WorldofWarcraft Holy Paladin Banned

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    Don't be taking care of some other guy's kids. This is exactly what this bitch wants. She knows you're weak enough to take her in when everyone else stays the fuck away from single moms.
     
  11. BayAreaGuy

    BayAreaGuy Good Day

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    Just curious, how did she contact you?

    What did you say?

    How did she respond to that rejection?
     
  12. Tyrannosaurus rex

    Tyrannosaurus rex GrizzlyTitan

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    Sounds to me like you don't enjoy the fact that she is suffering. You even feel bad for her according to your post.

    Sounds more like you just got a self esteem boost because that girl now think you are better than the guy with the money. And that she is chasing you. Sounds like you enjoy the validation or something, rather than her suffering. Doesn't Sound all that bad to me.

    Anyway, that's my take on it.
     
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  13. Zer

    Zer Gold Belt

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    Sounds like she married @Revolver . I say hate the shit out of her ts
     
  14. BearGrounds

    BearGrounds A great many scalps.

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    She was never anything but nice to you.

    It's not foul that you had the thoughts, but it is foul if you decide to revel in those thoughts; to feed and nurture them in order to prop yourself up mentally.

    The misery of others should only be enjoyed in the rarest of circumstances. This petty situation of yours not being one of them.
     
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  15. mushishi

    mushishi A is a, a is a, should I save her?

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    I don't know you, but I'm leaning towards psychopath.
     
  16. Peteyandjia

    Peteyandjia Saku Spring Staff Member Forum Administrator

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    It's a shitty attitude but at least you are questioning it.
     
  17. BisexualMMA

    BisexualMMA Don't Put My Name in the Name of Steroids!

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    Should be fine as long as you quietly revel in her misfortune and don't do this...

    During a trip to California on Republican Party business in the summer of 1973 Bundy rekindled his relationship with Brooks, who marveled at his transformation into a serious, dedicated professional, seemingly on the cusp of a distinguished legal and political career. He continued to date Kloepfer as well, though neither woman was aware of the other's existence. In the fall of 1973 Bundy matriculated at UPS Law School[53] and continued courting Brooks, who flew to Seattle several times to stay with him. They discussed marriage; at one point he introduced her to Davis as his fiancée.[27] In January 1974, however, he abruptly broke off all contact; her phone calls and letters went unreturned. Finally reaching him by phone a month later, Brooks demanded to know why Bundy had unilaterally ended their relationship without explanation. In a flat, calm voice, he replied, "Stephanie, I have no idea what you mean ..." and hung up. She never heard from him again.[54] Later he explained, "I just wanted to prove to myself that I could have married her."[55] At about the same time Bundy began skipping classes at law school, and by April he had stopped attending entirely,[56] as young women began to disappear in the Pacific Northwest.[57]
     
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  18. Phlog

    Phlog Dad Belt

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    I'm a sadist. I enjoy the suffering of others, but, not the suffering per say. It's more complex than that. The suffering of a starving child is horrible. I'm a very compassionate person, very caring, I help where I can and am sensitive to peoples pain.

    All that said I'd certainly feel a little schadenfreude in you're position.

    In this instance, you're not to blame, you were hurt and now you've been handed this ego boost on a plate. Probably everyone would like this.

    But then I feel everyone must enjoy causing pain in a willing participant. Either everyone does or my view is abnormal.
     
  19. BisexualMMA

    BisexualMMA Don't Put My Name in the Name of Steroids!

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    Sadists tend to project their outlook onto others. But at least you're honest about it.
     
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  20. MarloStanfield

    MarloStanfield The Wild Colonial Boy

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    only mental midgets stay away, kids are awesome and if i fell for a chick who had them id be happy to give them my love, why should they feel like they are a burden just because dads a cunt.
    my sons mom is with another bloke and they have a 6yo, he comes upto my place all the time and hangs, he loves it, i have zero feelings for the mom i doing it because it makes me happy seeing this kid happy, people trip when they see me with the exes kid, im man enough to live life on my terms not being afraid of what others may think
     

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