Society's view of BJJ

[Deleted member 3729]

I don't bring it up at work or anywhere else for that matter really. If people ask I tell them I do judo, but don't bother to say I do BJJ. Any further conservation past that tends to be dumb/repetitive/tiresome, so I usually change topics if they persist. Any karate kid style comments I've ever gotten were in good fun, just less funny/creative than the person thinks.

Generally not worth talking to someone about something, if they don't understand it.

I actually met a guy who worked for McKinsey & Co (basically the #1 management consulting firm) who did BJJ. I don't think BJJ is that exotic anymore. A lot of the people I train with have corporate management type jobs.

Maybe it's different in the South though. I can imagine the finance types in the South being pretty aristocratic. Just make fun of them for being pudgy girly-men.

i'm shocked anyone who works for McKinsey has time to train.

 

[Yompton]

Is it just me or does it seem like there's a lot of inferiority complexes on this thread? My BJJ teacher is very humble, that's how I would like to be if I were ever near his level.

I think it's important to treat BJJ as a sport, and not as a way of learning to kick someone's ass or treating your abilities as some power that you hold over others.

It's just you.

1.) You should NOT treat BJJ as a sport, it is self-defense. Treating it as a sport is exactly what the Gracies wanted to avoid. You don't see Rickson and Daniel doing the booty-scoot.

2.) This thread has a lot of bromance going on, because this is a reoccuring scenario(in one form or another) for almost everybody who participates. We don't have a lot of people on the outside who know and understand this particular bit of our lives. Lots of guys came in here, read the OP, and said "Yeah, I've been there". We're sharing our experiences, giving advise, and cracking a joke or two. No complexes here except for the ones coming in acting like they are better then us(point that finger in the mirror buddy). Loosen up that coal in your ass and go put it in a ring for your girl. Chill out for a while, come back, and share a story. Good day!

 

[POPPA ROTZEE]

Alright I think this depends on where you are and the kind of "company" you keep or are around on a daily basis.

So here is the story: I work in what you would call "high finance" on a trading desk for a mid level broker dealer trading Bonds. The norm for these guys extracurricular activity is Golf or drinking.

When they ask what I do and I mention BJJ/Muay Thai etc they usually laugh and try to make fun of me in some way. I also do not drink so that is two strikes against me. One guy in particular made this comment last week;

"So you are rolling around on the ground with guys all the time right? Well, can't you get herpes from that? I mean, I can't imagine that you are with the classiest of people"

I swear to god I almost flipped my lid when he said that to me. My response was "Your question/statement does not even warrant a response from me"

This is the kind of elitest snob BS that I have to put up with on a daily basis. Now mind you most of the people working here went to large exclusive universities or attended very wealthy high schools/private schools and look down on anybody doing BJJ or as he puts "meatheads beating up on each other"

When I meet people in the general public and the topic of hobbies etc come up and I mention BJJ/MMA/Muay Thai etc they usually are respectful or intrigued in general.

What have your experiences been? AND what do you think of that comment?

I think guys like that say things like that to talk themselves out of feeling like pussies.

Douche-bag
"I don't train/fight, its barbaric and immature".

Translation:
"I am terrified of fighting because I'm scared to get hit and I have a massive ego and I'm cocky as hell. I present myself to people as being better than them and If I got in a fight people would see how weak I really am"

 

[WitchCraft]

Most people have no clue what BJJ is. I don't ever bring it up, and don't really like talking about it when someone asks.

You sound pretty uptight. You don't have to be buddy buddy with your coworkers. Just do your job and keep your hobbies to yourself.

Yes you can get herpes from grappling.

ha...the lumberjack thing made me lol...

I'd have to agree. The variety of professions at my BJJ school are insane. One is a chiropractor, another is studying astrophysics and a few others are engineers.

Most of the people in society that like to view BJJ as something negative just don't understand it. I'm a girl in college and I've been training for a few months now and I just keep my training to myself besides conversations with friends. My family and most people I tell think its weird and don't understand why I lift or want to fight. I'd probably keep it out of work conversations too because when a girl fights, people think you're weird/deranged (which I may be):icon_chee

 

[philodox]

Hey dude, I'm also in college and I know exactly what you mean. Although I avoid wearing stupid tapout and affliction shirts, I often wear my gym's shirt and I've had people come up to me and say stuff like "so you think you can beat me up, huh?" or "So you train UFC?". It's annoying as shit, and I try to avoid telling people I train at all costs, just to avoid these uneducated jackasses who try to make everything into a "my dick is bigger than yours" contest.

You should assume Crane Kick position immediately.

 

[Neu!]

I used to tell ppl i train BJJ, but then i got tired of always having to explain shit, so now I just tell them I'm going to the gym when they ask me.

 

[georgejjr]

95% of the people I work with would have no idea what BJJ is. Or jiu-jitsu. Or even MMA, though 25% will sort of heard of the UFC (though you'd have to call it cage fighting). Judo, wrestling and boxing they've heard of, though they think of WWE if you mention wrestling.

And if you say you do judo or boxing they'll have done karate as a kid, and the topic will move on to more interesting things like football or hockey.

 

[chunglii]

I totally get where you are coming from.

Whenever I mention I train in BJJ or say I'm an MMA fan, people usually have an odd response. Most people have not even heard of BJJ. None of friends have, and nobody at school has(I'm 16). They have absolutly have no idea what it is. They think martial arts are Bruce Lee, Kung Fu, fancy kicks "Hii YAH!" Kind of stuff, which is ridiculous.

When I'm around adults, and they see me watching MMA, they are disgusted. They cannot beleive its even legal! Mind you I'm watching post UFC 100 events, and theyare appauled.

I was watching a UFC Unleashed episode featuring Frank Mir-Brock Lesnar I and my moms friend were amazed at how Mir won FROM THE BOTTOM. They'd never heard of BJJ.

Another time I was watching Couture-Rizzo and one of my moms friend said "Isn't this human cockfighting? Is this that sport where anything goes?" I reply "No, there are actually many rules, you can't do anything. It's safer than boxing" She was shocked and appauled.

The best thing to do is not even mention you train in BJJ/Muay Thai. Most ppl have never heard of them, and if they have they have a misconception about them. Few ppl know what they really are(true MMA fans/grapplers)

 

[ArchAngelos]

Not exactly on topic but a buddy of mine's gym has a sign out front that says "We offer BJJ." A group of mutual friends outside of our martial arts scene have asked me what's up with the sign offering oral sex. The funny thing is, the question was serious.

 

[NJrocks]

Alright I think this depends on where you are and the kind of "company" you keep or are around on a daily basis.

So here is the story: I work in what you would call "high finance" on a trading desk for a mid level broker dealer trading Bonds. The norm for these guys extracurricular activity is Golf or drinking.

When they ask what I do and I mention BJJ/Muay Thai etc they usually laugh and try to make fun of me in some way. I also do not drink so that is two strikes against me. One guy in particular made this comment last week;

"So you are rolling around on the ground with guys all the time right? Well, can't you get herpes from that? I mean, I can't imagine that you are with the classiest of people"

I swear to god I almost flipped my lid when he said that to me. My response was "Your question/statement does not even warrant a response from me"

This is the kind of elitest snob BS that I have to put up with on a daily basis. Now mind you most of the people working here went to large exclusive universities or attended very wealthy high schools/private schools and look down on anybody doing BJJ or as he puts "meatheads beating up on each other"

When I meet people in the general public and the topic of hobbies etc come up and I mention BJJ/MMA/Muay Thai etc they usually are respectful or intrigued in general.

What have your experiences been? AND what do you think of that comment?

that guy is a fucking pussy and is trying to play off the fact that you can beat the fuck out of him by making fun of you because he's insecure. most clowns like that don't like the idea of other people being able to kick their ass, even though it isnt hard

 

[tysnw]

on a side note i know plenty of judoka who view bjj as barbaric and gay..even though they're sister arts and contain nearly almost exactly the same thing

 

[ProdigyOfZen]

That's a pretty exciting job. What exactly do you do ? Brokerage, market-making, running a book ? What kind of background do you have ? What kind of bonds do you trade ?

Since I'm also involved in finance (Structured finance, i.e. LBOs and project financing) I'm interested in fellow grappling financiers !

The best advice I can give you is that it doesn't bring anything to tell your coworkers about BJJ.
It's not a socially accepted activity (I'm not saying it's right, rather just stating a fact), and you have nothing to win by explaining the activity to your colleagues, who just won't listen and make fun of you. You'll just earn yourself a tag of bare-knuckle freak or something.

The last colleague that mentionned BJJ to me said something around the lines of "yeah they're so fucked up, they fight without rules bare-knuckles until someone is unconscious".

Who cares if people know what BJJ is ? Jobs in finance are extremely superficial and image-based *within* organisations. So I said this in other posts here : just say you do judo. It's somehow an activity that society doesn't look down upon, and it's similar enough to BJJ.

Cheers.


EDIT : oh and you wouldn't believe how annoyed I am at the number of people working in finance who golf. I think it's sad that dudes in their 20's don't realise how much of a shame it is to not push their bodies while they can, and who instead focus on something as arbitrary as golf just to blend in. There is something really sad about society.

Hey dude, well I am a bond broker. IE sales. So I cover solely institutional accounts (Hedge Funds/Money Managers/Insurance Companies etc). Basically I buy and sell bonds for accounts (it is fun when you are making money haha). I do the same thing as you structured products, mortgage backed securities (mostly Non-Agency distressed paper), Credit Cards, Autos, Student Loans and HEQ. Aside from autos and cc's most everything I do is distressed debt. I do trade Corporates and Munis but not as much.

Hah my background? Went to a DII school and studied entrepreneurship/business management. Funny thing is it's because of Brasil that I got the job I have. Went to a Brasilian independence day party with some brasilian girls, one introduced me to her BF who was a MBS trader in Austin. Made friends with him and he got me the hookup for a job interview, I took it from there.

Now I am in Dallas trading bonds and training BJJ with Carlos Machado haha. BUT what I really want to do is trade commodities/currencies OR own my own business. Bonds are my least favorite financial instrument and only took the job to get onto the trading floor which is one of the hardest jobs to get.

PM me if you want.

 

[ProdigyOfZen]

This is an interesting discussion for me. I'm in private equity and I have often considered whether or not I should tell a soul who I work with or around about my BJJ/Muay Thai obsession. And it has become something that I love more than anything. As I've progressed, I grown more and more dismissive of all these guys in my profession who are always trying to one-up others and act superior. I respect the guys I train with more than just about anyone else. I am genuinely concerned that my training could be career limiting. Most are like me, MBA's from good schools, finance gearheads, etc. What are your beliefs on this?

Hey man, it really depends on how they view you. If you do really well and they respect you then I don't think they will view you differently if you tell them you do BJJ/Muay Thai. BUT it is kinda hard to explain the large mat marks on my face etc when I walk into work lol. What PE firm do you work for and are you on Bloomberg? PM me here and I will give you my name if you are on bloomberg.

Much better for your career progression would be to kiss as much ass as possible/play golf/screw women royally/make fun of EVERYONE who doesn't do what you do at work-put them down and drink. This will get you FAR in your career in high finance. I don't make fun of people, I don't drink, although I like golf i dont play because i can do that when i am 50, i do meet a lot of ladies but certainly do not screw them over and I DEFINITELY do not kiss anybody's ass even if they are the president of the trading floor or CEO.

BUT i have made a lot of money for the firm for a "rookie" BUT that is slowly ending with this BS bond bubble going on now.

 

[ProdigyOfZen]

ha...the lumberjack thing made me lol...

I'd have to agree. The variety of professions at my BJJ school are insane. One is a chiropractor, another is studying astrophysics and a few others are engineers.

Most of the people in society that like to view BJJ as something negative just don't understand it. I'm a girl in college and I've been training for a few months now and I just keep my training to myself besides conversations with friends. My family and most people I tell think its weird and don't understand why I lift or want to fight. I'd probably keep it out of work conversations too because when a girl fights, people think you're weird/deranged (which I may be):icon_chee

I am sure someone of every profession trains BJJ. That is not what i was referring to. I was trying to point out his obvious elitist comment that he made to me. Not to mention that he walks by me all the time and says HIiii yahhhh to make it more obvious of what he thinks of me.

 

[redaxe]

i'm shocked anyone who works for McKinsey has time to train.

Well this was in Korea--McKinsey sent him to do consulting for several different corporations there and he lived in a hotel and worked 14-16 hour days for several weeks at a time when he was on projects, and then he would have breaks in between the projects when he could train. So he would be there every day for a week or two and then he would disappear for a long time and eventually resurface again.

 

[thedoc56**]

most ppl still think the bigger stronger fighter wins in a fight and mounting another guy is gay. ignore it or choke em out =]

 

[Fedorzilla]

Ok, this is just simple interpersonal relations and it goes back to middle school. When someone insults you or something you care about, and you show your discontent and get grouchy, you're only inviting more ridicule. I actually have a lot of friends back in the States that call it "man wrestling" because they want to bust my balls about it. I just call it man wrestling as well and laugh WITH them. If you don't take yourself so seriously, it won't be such a sticking point.

When people call it barbaric (or infer that), I often point out that "you know it's funny, because I had that impression when I first started, when I was simply in it as a learning experience. Turns out most of my classmates have a higher level of education than people I know from country clubs, gym, etc." Then I'll explain how so many of the guys I know from BJJ are PhDs, Attorneys, NASA employees, medical doctors, MBAs, etc. In addition, I will make comments that close the gap. For example, I would say "it's actually quite similar to golf in that it's a thinking man's game, similar to chess but with leverage as the foundation. You will see students defeated by people 50-80 lbs. lighter because the superior BJJ player is better with technique or a quicker thinker. It's much easier to understand if you observe it in person. You should come see it"

Personally, though, I have to admit that I am hesitant to mention BJJ at work unless pressed, b/c I'm an attorney and the stigma, regardless of justification, remains. It is, ultimately, combat and people will see it as such because people are mindless dullards who are intimidated by it and often denigrate it because calling it "barbaric" is a good way for them to deflect their insecurity and/or lack of understanding via acting as if they're "above it" themselves.

As far as the herpes comment, you should just tune out immediately and just hand the guy a cat toy so he can amuse himself.

 

[Irenaeus]

I just remembered. The most respected national financial newspaper had an article about buisinessmen training at the Renzo Gracie Academy in NYC, painting it as some kind of new trend in that milleu. I have no idea how representative that is, as it seems quite a bit of people in this thread with careers within finance have different experiences.

 

[redaxe]

Ok, this is just simple interpersonal relations and it goes back to middle school. When someone insults you or something you care about, and you show your discontent and get grouchy, you're only inviting more ridicule. I actually have a lot of friends back in the States that call it "man wrestling" because they want to bust my balls about it. I just call it man wrestling as well and laugh WITH them. If you don't take yourself so seriously, it won't be such a sticking point.

Yes, in other words if someone flips you shit, you don't get mad, you flip it right back.

 

[Lutador011]

You will always get "strange" reactions from most domesticated men over 25-30 years old. Here is my opinion why ...

The fact that you are a fighter reminds them they are not. This is an uncomfortable truth.

Men past their prime and out of shape do not like to be reminded their better days are behind them. They also feel a secret guilt for letting themselves get this way. It gets worse the older and fatter the man gets. You should see the dads that scream for violence at my son's Lacrosse games. The weaker and more pathetic the man, the more he yells at the kids to do the things he can't.

(House cats are jealous of outdoor cats)

And we have a winner!!!!

Buddy, you are spot on