So...how would you react if Gary Coleman attacked you?

Discussion in 'Archives' started by Magic Man, Jun 28, 2002.

  1. Magic Man

    Magic Man Guest

    I always wondered this, I mean midgets attacking people.

    I don't think it's good karma to take care of this situation via regular means, as you'd probably be taken to jail + getting an armbar or a heel hook on a midget is probably incredibly difficult.

    We once had a midget at our school, who had a bit of a complex, and would start fights at slightest provocation.

    Now there was this great game we used to play in pysical education, it was called "Contact", and was a deceptively simple, addictive and painful game. Now, the objective of the game was that a person would stand at the centre of a given boundary, unable to move from a hoop placed on the ground. Next, he was given an inflated (and as u know, very hard) volleyball, of which he was given free reign to openly vault at any sucker who go too close - the best part was that our PE instructor often got the hardest throwers into these rings...your truly somehow recognised as one of these elite athletes.

    Anyway, one day I was happily pegging my balls at hysterical boys and girls (I loved it when it hit them in the tit at close range), and i noticed the midget kid picking on one of my friends. I thought it would be funny if I sconed him in the head with the ball as i never much liked him.

    So I swung as hard as I could and the ball struck him in the face, the force of which keeled him over, from which he would not rise. the game was stopped and I of course denied intentionally throwing it hard at the guy. He was in the sick room for half the day.

    Was I wrong to do that...I think not!

    - magic (I am not a midget hater)

    Gary's first victim...don't let this happen to YOU!

    [​IMG]
     
  2. SteelCityShooter

    SteelCityShooter Yellow Belt

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    I'm thinking Gary's the type of evil twat that would crawl through your cat flap and kill tiddles if you fuck with him.
     
  3. Magic Man

    Magic Man Guest

    common! you don't think he can fit thru a cat flap do you?

    Do you?

    Oh god, i have my doubts.

    - m
     
  4. seldomTap

    seldomTap Slowest black belt ever

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    LMFAO @ MAgic the Midget basher!

    They can't be trusted though, especially Gary Coleman!
     
  5. pugz

    pugz Green Belt

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    come on man u know u liked it mabey even just a littlle. u liked it.
     
  6. Dude I had to wrestle a midget my senior year. It was wierd because I didn't know what to do to him and he was one of those stout little dudes. He benched almost 300 lbs. despite being just barely 3' tall. Anyway, it was really wierd and he was a tough kid, but finally I just rushed him and picked him up under his armpits and threw him. It was then I realized just how much fun this could actually be. I tech-falled him by just coninuing to pick him up and throw him across the mat. He was a good sport about it, even though I was having fun with his disability... shit, something just occurred to me: I am going to hell... damn it.
     
  7. Shooto Panama

    Shooto Panama Gold Belt

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    i`ll bring Webster to make a clean figh......any bet?
     
  8. Tiki

    Tiki Guest

    Were you wrong to hit him in the face with the ball? How can you even ask. Of course you were wrong. Midgets are there to perfect your aim. The head is too big a target. Next time, go for the midget nuts. If you can hit them, then you have good aim.
     
  9. Ralphage

    Ralphage Black Belt

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    So...how would you react if Gary Coleman attacked you?


    One word: SOCCERKICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
     
  10. pugz

    pugz Green Belt

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    dont feel bad i thought that was funny so i guess im driving the buss.
     
  11. Bloodlust

    Bloodlust Purple Belt

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    Id clean Gary's Clock. My Liver kicks would be at is neck.


    The only bad part is Gary's teeth are lined up with my genetalia.
     
  12. bob

    bob Ricky Gervais belt

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    the nut bite thing would put me off....i'd probably just pick him up by the ankles untill all the blood ruched to his head and he passed out......combat swimmer. how strong was the miget, and did he give u a run for you money...they cant really be very strong if the are as tall as a 6 year old
     
  13. Magic Man

    Magic Man Guest

    HAHAHAHA, you are going to hell you focker! Shit I could just imagine some guy having reservations at first and then after the first midget throw you started liking and and were then on doing it over and over screaming "yippee!".

    Yeah, you're going to hell, at least I only did it once.

    - m
     
  14. TheGame

    TheGame Green Belt

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    I would sick my dog on him.:eek:
     
  15. Magic Man

    Magic Man Guest

    THAT is one scary fucking dog man! Did you snap that pic when you tried to steal his food?

    - m
     
  16. Milkman Dan

    Milkman Dan Black Belt

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    I was just wondering, would a women that Gary bangs ever be satisfied by his 1/8 inch penis?

    [​IMG]
     
  17. I would Powerbomb Gary Coleman.
     
  18. cmv

    cmv Green Belt

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    nope not your fault. the first rule in any sport: keep your eye on the ball. i remember playin baseball 1 summer and i hit a line drive directly at the pitcher. it knocked the wind out of him for a couple o minutes. the kids mom came onto the field and demanded that i apologize. i told her wouldnt, if hes not prepared, dont play. the ref removed her and her son from the field.

    i know its not the same situation with the midget but it does beg the question. WTF, why did you let the ball hit you in the head little man?
     
  19. Magic Man

    Magic Man Guest

    hahaha, totally equality huh? That's what it all about

    -m
     
  20. Meat Fist

    Meat Fist Administrator Administrator

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    Hahaha, you midget haters!

    And it was in the pages of Hustler magazine Oct. of 94, Gary Coleman's condition is due to heart problems as a child, not midgetry. He sports a normal 7 1/2 inch penis. Find the pictures if you don't believe me.
     

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