Regale me with your puns!

[Red Beard]

Guys, hey guys hey. I've been rather busy with school and my side business so I haven't been on here as much...reading just not as many responses. Well any tits, I was in the Cape this weekend to hit some estate sales and also relax at the beach house the kid rented. So, as we drive there I spot a vehicle like this...

I wake my wife out of a cold dead sleep and say, "Hey look, a DUMP truck." She shook her head and contemplated jumping out of the vehicle. That led me to think of a fun thread idea. @Clippy has a pun thread but those aren't ones we have all organically nailed. Let me hear your real-life puns!!!!!

 

[Panty Raider]

you have not lived until you tipped one of those over with someone inside...hilarious.

 

[Tone C]

I read puns! as penis.

I'm leaving disappointed.

 

[Red Beard]

you have not lived until you tipped one of those over with someone inside...hilarious.

I read puns! as penis.

I'm leaving disappointed.

Neither of these are puns. You guys suck! Also...Hi Rocco.

 

[Otto!]

I once met a contortionist in the Philippines. I called him the Manila Folder.

 

[Red Beard]

I once met a contortionist in the Philippines. I called him the Manila Folder.

That's so good!!!!!

 

[Ares Black]

I fucking hate puns.

I wasn't even gonna click on this thread but I guess I'm just a glutton for punnishment.

 

[Red Beard]

I fucking hate puns.

I wasn't even gonna click on this thread but I guess I'm just a glutton for punnishment.

Thank youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!

 

[Otto!]

If I fart and blame it on someone else, does that make me a scatological liar?

 

[Red Beard]

If I fart and blame it on someone else, does that make me a scatological liar?

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii-ooooooooooooooooooooooooh!

Spoiler

yes.

 

[Otto!]

I went to a seafood buffet. I wanted to eat all the clams but I didn’t want to seem shelfish.

 

[Red Beard]

I went to a seafood buffet. I wanted to eat all the clams but I didn’t want to seem shelfish.

@Otto! I feel like you do these a lot...

 

[syct23]

You know what kind of fish that is...?

 

[Jesus H. Sherdog]

Did you hear about the chameleon who couldn’t change color?

He had a reptile dysfunction

 

[Jesus H. Sherdog]

What’s the best way to get a country girl’s attention?

A tractor

 

[Goon Dog]

Guys, hey guys hey. I've been rather busy with school and my side business so I haven't been on here as much...reading just not as many responses. Well any tits, I was in the Cape this weekend to hit some estate sales and also relax at the beach house the kid rented. So, as we drive there I spot a vehicle like this...

I wake my wife out of a cold dead sleep and say, "Hey look, a DUMP truck." She shook her head and contemplated jumping out of the vehicle. That led me to think of a fun thread idea. @Clippy has a pun thread but those aren't ones we have all organically nailed. Let me hear your real-life puns!!!!!

That truck's hauling a shitload of material.

 

[William Huggins]

Neither of these are puns. You guys suck! Also...Hi Rocco.

You can't suck puns buddy, only............

 

[Panty Raider]

I don't want to come between these two...ODI????

 

[Thai Domi]

What kind of hair do they sell at Waffle House?

Spoiler

Eggstentions

 

[THEfightsAREfixed]

ive seen better threads than this at a homeless encampment (?)