My Pie Fell Off- Am I marked by Christ?

So, here's the scoop:
I was ready to tuck into a Fray Bentos pie. I scraped off the crispy layer of pastry and readied the pie to put back in the oven (PROTIP: It goes crispy again). I put the knife in the sink for my girlfriend to wash later when she gets home from work and the pie fell off. It was face down and upon inspection, completely doomed and covered in dog hair and random shit.

Possible Causes:

Wind: Window was closed. No draft problems in my house as far as I'm aware.

Poor Balance: No way. That shit had ample room. It wasn't even hanging off.

Me: Nope. I was the other side of the room getting the microwave ready for my girlfriend to clean when she gets home from work.

Jesus Christ: By process of elimination, probably.

Anyone ever had a similar religious experience? If so, what could it mean?

 

Fray called, he wants his Bentos back

 

You must be very bored to make this nonsense thread. Getting impatient waiting for your imaginary girlfriend?

 

What is this shit?

 

Did I mention you can scrape off the crispy layer and put it back in the oven and the next layer goes crispy too?

 

Somebody is going to barge into this thread and call you poor. They'll probably lash out at me too just for being here.

 

Dude I knew gets Fray Bentos confused with Fidel Castro. No idea why. He did it in a quiz.

 

Rip wants to know if youve been channeling demons

Your pie is posessed

 

how did you pie end up covered in "dog hair and other random shit" when it fell on the floor tiger?

i thought you said you had a girlfriend...

realdoll owner exposed itt.

 

The fact is, you and/or the pie are demonically possessed.

This is definitely the work of demons.

 

That "pie" looks like dog food

 

Instant karma for your misogynistic lazy ass.

Its a knife fam, not that hard to wash.

 

You and Sam Merlotte sound poor.

 

That's all I needed to conclude my time in this thread. Outstanding.

 

"Pro tip," just like "hack," is a shitty buzz word that needs to GTFO.

 

Wet food.

Dogs go apeshit for that stuff.

Also poor people.

 

It's true the grade of meat used is the same as it is for pet food. Dat pastry doe

 

I let her do all the washing up. I tell her she's better at it than I am (she isn't). It's good for her self-esteem.

 

But she's out working while you're at home baking pies, yes?

 

Yeh she sells pins. Comes back with her hair matted every now and again but I take the rough with the smooth. It's all part of the pin trade.