Most embarrasing/mortifying moments in your life

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by MC Paul Barman, Aug 11, 2019.

  1. Happy Man

    Happy Man Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    I feel bad for you bro. You shamed yourself in front of hotties. You’ll remember that forever.
     
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  2. Sansnom

    Sansnom Gold Belt

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    Hey, at least she didn't respond back with a dirty text of her own.

    bork1}
    She did actually.

    But once I entered that giant cave of hers and kept thinking about getting aids or some shit I completely lost it. Didn't help that her fake enjoyment was super obvious and that she was stoned on crack probably trying to forget what she was doing.

    All in all, a horrifying experience.
     
  3. Brother Numsi

    Brother Numsi Brown Belt

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    Texted my guy that I couldn't make it to his Super Bowl party because my roommate was having car trouble and didn't feel well which was a bold face lie. Accidentally sent it to my roommate instead. He got the text and was like, "Dude, if you don't wanna go, just don't go. It's all good."

    Not my embarrassing moment but I wanted to crawl in a hole
     
  4. eighterumg5

    eighterumg5 Purple Belt

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  5. Thunderhead

    Thunderhead Assman Extraordinaire

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    Wait, hold on here. I can only surmise that at the time you didn't know it was a horrendous experience due to your youth and inexperience. It was only after you came to the realization how shitty it was compared to the other experiences you've had in your later years that you were able to determine the comparison... I wonder if there are men out there who have limited amount of sexual experience - all of them which happened to be terrible - and they're living the rest of their lives with this misconception that sex is a terrible thing...

    Lol, what a bunch of fucking losers.

    Anyway, I just took a bunch of hits with my Sour Diesel cartridge and my mind is just wandering like a ramblin' man.
     
  6. SamSchmidt

    SamSchmidt Infantry Belt

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    Was at a sorority/Frat mixer and there was this one chick I liked from AGD.

    Was standing there with my buddies and she was with a group of friends. Saw my chance to go talk to her when she smiled and said, "What's up how you doing cutie?" Looking right at me. I was like, "You know I've always wanted to ask you out, how about it?"

    Really loud. That's when she flipped her hair over and had a fucking Bluetooth in. The whole time she was talking to someone else. Made my friends crack the fuck up. I wandered off and got shitfaced, not to get laid that night. : (
     
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  7. Sansnom

    Sansnom Gold Belt

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    You're way too high lol

    I knew it was a terrible experience the moment it happened.

    You don't need to have good experiences in life to know what a bad experiences feel like.
     
  8. RetiredSlave

    RetiredSlave Black Belt

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    No shame crew, checking in.
     
  9. Thunderhead

    Thunderhead Assman Extraordinaire

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    But just imagine, just imagine that there are guys out there in this vast world whose sole sexual encounter is similar to the one you had in your youth.

    Either they must think it was the shittiest experience they've ever had, or the most incredible. It's hard to have perspective when your view is limited...

    Wow.
     
  10. Danger Dave

    Danger Dave Yellow Belt

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    when i was a kid i used to pee the bed and my mom bought me a pee alarm. was pretty embarrasing but now that i am an adult, kinda funny
     
  11. Sansnom

    Sansnom Gold Belt

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    I see what you're trying to say but it doesn't work like that.

    That wasn't my first experience at the time but let's say it was, I would still know it was terrible.

    Let's say the only experience you had driving a car was when you bumped into another car. You know it was a bad experience and won't assume that driving a car sucks because of it.
     
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  12. Thunderhead

    Thunderhead Assman Extraordinaire

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    Yeah, that makes sense.

    The first time I had sex, I didn't even cum and was left thinking to myself, "Well, that's it?" What I felt at the time was a strange mixture of both disappointment of the present situation and excitement for the future at the same time.
     
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  13. JoshTehV

    JoshTehV Brown Belt

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    This chick and I finished at the same time while 69ing with the lights off. I thought she was just really wet that time and when she dipped to the bathroom to clean up I turned the lights on and found myself looking like Kumar the Red Nosed Haji
     
  14. JoshTehV

    JoshTehV Brown Belt

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    I've yet to meet any human that didn't enjoy sex, you too high man
     
  15. GearSolidMetal

    GearSolidMetal I'm here to chew bubblegum and bang your mom. Platinum Member

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  16. Thunderhead

    Thunderhead Assman Extraordinaire

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    It's a thought experiment that I didn't want to have in the first place. I blame it on the fucking weed.
     
  17. SamSchmidt

    SamSchmidt Infantry Belt

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    Oof. Yeah I did that to a stripper I pulled from a club. Went to the military department early in the morning with no time for a shower. Walked in front of Generals and Colonels and Master sergeants and God and everybody covered from nose to chin in red.

    Thankfully my MSG grabbed my ass and hussled me to the bathroom. I had no clue.
     
  18. Dusty Rhodes

    Dusty Rhodes Where muh thweet THAFFIRE?

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    Holy fuck this is amazing lmao
     
  19. moreorless87

    moreorless87 Out To Lunch

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    A few but probably toped by managing to roll over on a hot water bottle during a school camping trip aged 12 and having it leak into my sleeping bag with teachers and class makes making the obvious assumption.
     
  20. mrsenor

    mrsenor Black Belt

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