I was a pallbearer yesterday, I had one job, and I botched it

The last few funerals I've been to they didn't even have pallbearers. The churches were built such that they could roll the coffin right to and into the hearse. The cemetery had a turf friendly version of the coffin support that they rolled right to the grave. The last time I served as a pallbearer was at an old country church with a steep 6 feet tall set of steps.

Was the cemetery a large one? My aunt was buried in Milwaukee. The cemetery is huge, the traffic is bad so they don't attempt funeral processions. They have a pamphlet they distribute at the funerals with a map to and into the cemetery to the grave site. It seems that cemeteries are laid out by drunks with roadways in haphazard patterns that make no sense. If I was designing a cemetery, the roads would be in a grid pattern with numbered streets running North and South and Avenues running East and West.
 
The last few funerals I've been to they didn't even have pallbearers. The churches were built such that they could roll the coffin right to and into the hearse. The cemetery had a turf friendly version of the coffin support that they rolled right to the grave. The last time I served as a pallbearer was at an old country church with a steep 6 feet tall set of steps.

Was the cemetery a large one? My aunt was buried in Milwaukee. The cemetery is huge, the traffic is bad so they don't attempt funeral processions. They have a pamphlet they distribute at the funerals with a map to and into the cemetery to the grave site. It seems that cemeteries are laid out by drunks with roadways in haphazard patterns that make no sense. If I was designing a cemetery, the roads would be in a grid pattern with numbered streets running North and South and Avenues running East and West.

big cemetary with huge round roads in them, like 3 or 4 circles that go way into the woods - the grave plot was a bit in from the cemetary road
 
Thanks man

I just feel especially bad for the wife, she was close to her gram. Yeah she was 91.5 but she was doing ok, had a sudden super stroke and passed same day.

I just wish I didn't end up in dumb assed situations like I always do at her time of need

Just do all the kinky stuff she likes and the rest will be forgiven.
 
big cemetary with huge round roads in them, like 3 or 4 circles that go way into the woods - the grave plot was a bit in from the cemetary road

You shouldn't blame yourself in this. The people running the funeral should have been better organized. I forgot that at that large cemetery I was at, they had places to put signs directing mourners to the persons grave.
 
Your wife has to have a sense of humour, which is genetic. In conclusion gram is laughing at you right now clipman.
 
Your wife has to have a sense of humour, which is genetic. In conclusion gram is laughing at you right now clipman.

When we left the grave plot, The wife's Dad's tire was flat, flat FLAT

Wonder what he did to piss off Gram
 
My wife's Gram died, why I haven't been online.

I was one of the pallbearers and despite my destroyed back / leg - right side of my body not working situation, I was honoured to help and do this for her Gram/family

Funeral day, everything was well organized... at the start. They told us the service was starting soon, heads up - 10 minutes, did the service. There was a reception between service / burial. We were all eating sandwiches and I was mid bite when someone yelled out - WE'RE ALL GOING TO THE BURIAL SITE NOW!!!

I ran with the wife out the door and went to my car, seen people were leaving the parking lot so I hurried along to the cemetary cause I knew where it was.

I was waiting and waiting at the cemetary for the rest to show up ... and then the wife's Dad called asking if we were going to show up. We were at the cemetary already and had to find them. The coffin was already positioned into the grave plot ready to be lowered but they still waited for us for closing ceremonies.

I just feel really bad and the Dad asked why I didn't wait for the congregration.

I wasn't the only one who thought it was a disorganized mess, every other event was announced but this part had no prelude, just everyone running to their cars and speeding off

It was fucked

I feel bad - I seem to screw up most things :(

I don't know who filled in for me but I wasn't there for the family like I should have been.

Her brother was another pallbearer and was also waiting with me at the wrong spot ... don't know who filled in for us.
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I've been a pall bearer.

I did it right, because when something is the very last thing you're ever going to do for a loved one, you do it right.
 
I've been a pall bearer.

I did it right, because when something is the very last thing you're ever going to do for a loved one, you do it right.

go fuck yourself
 
I've been a pall bearer.

I did it right, because when something is the very last thing you're ever going to do for a loved one, you do it right.

Every time I was a pallbearer, the funeral home provided a car to take the pallbearers to the cemetery except when the cemetery was on the church property.
 
Pay attention dip shit. You ruined a mans funeral. I'd be ashamed. Now learn from this atrocity and make yourself a better person.
 
Coffins can be really fucking heavy. Like, "there's a nonzero chance that we're going to drop this fucking thing on the 200 yard walk up the hill" sort of heavy.

Lol so true. I had the honor of being a pallbearer for a military member in my unit that died. We trained with bare hands and an empty coffin, practiced the flag fold and all of that. There were 6 of us. When it came to funeral day we were wearing our DEU's and white gloves, we picked up that coffin and holy shit we were surprised. It was heavy as fuck, like we all had to switch to using two hands 1/4 of the way through and we had to dig deep mentally. We were all very surprised and the deceased wasn't that big of a guy.

Coffins are fucking heavy.
 
My wife's Gram died, why I haven't been online.

I was one of the pallbearers and despite my destroyed back / leg - right side of my body not working situation, I was honoured to help and do this for her Gram/family

Funeral day, everything was well organized... at the start. They told us the service was starting soon, heads up - 10 minutes, did the service. There was a reception between service / burial. We were all eating sandwiches and I was mid bite when someone yelled out - WE'RE ALL GOING TO THE BURIAL SITE NOW!!!

I ran with the wife out the door and went to my car, seen people were leaving the parking lot so I hurried along to the cemetary cause I knew where it was.

I was waiting and waiting at the cemetary for the rest to show up ... and then the wife's Dad called asking if we were going to show up. We were at the cemetary already and had to find them. The coffin was already positioned into the grave plot ready to be lowered but they still waited for us for closing ceremonies.

I just feel really bad and the Dad asked why I didn't wait for the congregration.

I wasn't the only one who thought it was a disorganized mess, every other event was announced but this part had no prelude, just everyone running to their cars and speeding off

It was fucked

I feel bad - I seem to screw up most things :(

I don't know who filled in for me but I wasn't there for the family like I should have been.

Her brother was another pallbearer and was also waiting with me at the wrong spot ... don't know who filled in for us.

Who were the other pallbearers that made it on time? They didn't communicate with you?
 

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