I think I f*d up

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by mcgoatp4p#1, Sep 9, 2018.

  1. mcgoatp4p#1 Blue Belt

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    I was on tinder trying to get laid, and I matched with this girl then started throwing out random bullshit cuz it usually works. I lied and said I play guitar and just got a new puppy. Anyway, we went on a date and it went well, and it turns out I actually like her a lot and she agreed to a second date. Now I just have to hope she doesn't bring up either lie or I'm probably boned. I don't even know why I mentioned guitar--i play piano really well and could've just said that.

    I'm 30 but swear I have the maturity and foresight of a 17 yr old
     
  2. pookiyama Purple Belt

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    Tell her on the second date that you don't take Tinder serious and you lied to her, but you think *this* might have potential and so you're correcting yourself because you know how important honesty is when you want something to last.

    Checks all the boxes and she'll think you're honest and mature.
     
  3. GeorgeO Green Belt

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    On the bright side: you can still get a puppy
     
  4. Watcha gunna doo Banned Banned

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    say your dog died and you have artrithis
     
  5. Reyesnuthugr Dominick Reyes Belt

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    You can learn some guitar quickly. As long as you didn't say you were an expert, you can just show you're learning guitar as a beginner

    As for the puppy, wtf. Guess you may have to get a puppy you dingus

    I hope you're not a chronic liar, though. Time to stop for exactly this reason (and others having to do with very serious social and employment repercussions)
     
  6. lsa Maître d' at The Pussy Lounge

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    You should tell her how you fucked your whore of a friend and that you could not keep it hard.
    I am sure that will take the focus of puppies and guitars
     
  7. EvilDDS Black Belt

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    And get a cat, that’ll fix everything. Cats rule the world
     
  8. A.A. Riggs sweet ... sweet meat!

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    I love that bit about why did I have to say guitar? It's like the elephant in THE FAR SIDE who plays the flute.
     
  9. lsa Maître d' at The Pussy Lounge

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    based on TS name and post history, he does NOT deserve a cat.
     
  10. meauneau Brown Belt

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    Say guitar is piano in classical Greek and show her how good you are on the piano then tell her you gave your puppy to your little cousin.

    You need lies to solve problems caused by lies.
     
  11. Staph infection Glue historian

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    nice of you trying to spread herpes to this poor woman. Stick to the broke whore that fucks you when she needs a break from the mandingos.
     
  12. EvilDDS Black Belt

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    The Far Side!!!!!! Awesome
     
  13. HelloJapan Talking loud and saying nothing. Platinum Member

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    Fixed that for ya. You're welcome.
     
  14. HARRISON_3 Gold Belt

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  15. AGGAMEMNON66 ———Villain———

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    Only chance TS will ever have to get a bitch imo..
     
  16. LiQuiD42 Red Belt

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    Tell her, “Did I say guitar? I meant piano...” Then explain how your new puppy was hit by a car and how you are devastated.
     
  17. MikeMcMann Banned Banned

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    Just before your date chop off or smash your fingers on one hand. Tell her that is your strumming hand and you can no longer play guitar.

    [​IMG]

    Tell her the puppy died in the same accident that took your fingers.

    Easy fix. Why do people over complicate these things?
     
    Last edited: Sep 10, 2018
  18. Steven_Universe Banned Banned

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    You’re stressing a lot about a girl that you don’t even know brother.
     
  19. nostradumbass Steel Belt

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    Borrow someone else's puppy and learn a few songs on guitar. She's probably not going to expect you replicate a Jimi Hendrix concert for her.

    Then after you smash, send Mantis Toboggan over to her house to give her the bad news.

    [​IMG]
     
  20. IReallyDoTrainUFC Banned Banned

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    Ur screwed... No girl is going to choose a pianist over a guitar shredder.
     

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