I lost one of my best friends today

this is how I read the story correct me if I'm wrong, its a shit situation between you and your bro
a marriage should be made to work and last thing you want is to start your marriage off with a lingering issue like "my wife is part cause to why our friends are separated"

after her friend snubbed her it should have been
A- your wife-to-be calls out "A" and expresses her anger about her not being there for her
B- either a fight breaks out or "A" understands her shortcomings as a friend and works to mend the relationship
C- time heals all and things are at least back to normal where you can be friends again

As far as I know, your girl had from late 2012 to April of 2014 to simply talk about her feelings to "A" but never did (unless attempts were made but not otherwise stated).

Asking your bro to be your best man is fine.
extending a "courtesy invite" but electing to tell him "it'd be best if your wife doesn't come" is fucking stupid and handled horribly by you and your wife if I'm being perfectly honest. it probably caused a lot of problems/arguments between your bro and his wife.

don't think you guys are like 100% to blame for this. its IMO 50/50

"A" should have been there as a friend
your fiance should have considered your relationship with "R" before just "cutting ties" with them for her own sake
your fiance should have taken the above into consideration along with you and worked to mend the relationship
all of the above should have been done before asking "R" to be a best man and extending a "courtesy invite" with terms & conditions
your buddy shouldn't have taken til 9 days out to make a decision
regarding the above, "R" and "A" most likely were fighting about this decision for a long time.


congrats on the wedding btw sorry about being out a bestman

EDIT: I also realize that as this point there is pretty much nothing that can be done to salvage the relationship and thats fucking brutal dude.

my fiance says "R" is a fucking asshole for waiting THIS long to tell you he's out as a best man, and should have at the very least stuck with his decision to be your best man and then told you afterwards that this was probably the last time you'll see me and then end the relationship...She also said that weddings just breed drama/problems...we've encountered our fair share already in the 5 months of planning its insane, and all from just one of her bridesmaid's!
 
I honestly clicked thinking you would of had a story about your dog running away.....
 
I lost my best friend a few months before my own wedding. I have seen it happen before. It's shocking how adults act sometimes.
 
Let his wife bang your wife. Or he can bang your wife, or you can bang his wife.

Or you can bang him or he can bang you while you're banging his wife. There's a lot of possibilities.
 
bebop22k said:
pussy ALWAYS defeats the bro code. I see this all the time.
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Unfortunately, you're right. I've seen guys who have been great friends for over a decade go separate ways because one tried to fuck the other's girl. Can't trust anyone.
 
ballhawkdawk said:
Unfortunately, you're right. I've seen guys who have been great friends for over a decade go separate ways because one tried to fuck the other's girl. Can't trust anyone.
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Well that guy obviously wasn't a bro. Just a snake disguised as a bro.

People need to choose their mates wisely.
 
Call your bro, tell him to bring his wife to the wedding, lock him in a room with your fiance and tell her you're not getting married until they work that shit out.

Guaranteed they'll be hugging and crying within 30 minutes.
 
Lights Out 101 said:
Well that guy obviously wasn't a bro. Just a snake disguised as a bro.

People need to choose their mates wisely.
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true dat. ur true bros are always there 4 u



BEER said:
Call your bro, tell him to bring his wife to the wedding, lock him in a room with your fiance and tell her you're not getting married until they work that shit out.

Guaranteed they'll be hugging and crying within 30 minutes.
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or catfighting/blood spilling
 
I agree with the "sometimes people don't know what to say" crowd.

What does your friend have to say about how his wife handled your fianc
 
I've been in a similar situation TS. Me and the wife set our best friends up, a year down the line the women fall out. Me and friend lose contact. 3 years go by, we miss each other's weddings.

I made the first move of reconciliation. I'm happy I did. strongly suggest you make the move to sort this out. Life really is to short for this shit to bog you down
 
Your friends wife is obviously the reason he isn't attending. Since she isn't really welcome and she knows it, she probably talked him into not going. He likely didn't want to hurt his wife by attending, though he knows it would hurt you, he probably cares for her more, of course, it's his wife.

If I was in that situation, I know that I'd go to the wedding for my best friend, especially if they came to mine, no matter the reason, I'd go.

I've had a gf that really didn't like my best friend, and she'd try to make me never hang out with him, but I always made the time no matter what. I wasn't going to push any friends away, then again, I wasn't married to this girl and even if I was, I wouldn't push my friends away, no matter what, especially a best friend who has always had my back no matter what. Hard to come across true friends these days.
 
Is it really that big of a deal that he can't sit out the wedding and still be your best friend?


Why didn't you take the chance to force reconciliation between the two women?
 
Your friend is not a friend. My best friends wife hates me. I know it, my wife knows it, he knows it and my boys wife knows it. It goes back to when I was single and a man whore.. Well fast forward 10 years, I am married and have a child, but the bish still hates me. Yes, single me was not the best guy to be around but I never pushed him to do anything other than get drunk with me and play Golden Tee. We both have the same ethos if you are with a chick you like don't cheat but since I sent him home in a cab, somehow I am a dick.
Your boy if he is your boy, would put up with her shit and still be your friend.
BTW if women did not have a vajayjay I would have nothing to do with their pyscho asses.
 
BEER said:
Not to talk shit about your future wife, and I certainly understand where she's coming from, but she should have let that shit go.
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I agree.

Also, I think there should be three kinds of friends for people in a relationship. Both should have some of their "own" friends and then you'd have those you're both friends with.

Obviously in a best case scenario all of these people would get along, but if they wouldn't, it shouldn't be the end of the world.
 
This is some stupid drama. I feel sympathy for you for the fact that you lost your friend, but have no respect for any party involved.
 
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