it goes like this: we're both 19. we're really close friends and have been since we were 16. we go to college about 100 miles apart. we came home from school (three-week break) and started hanging out a lot and basically got really datey really quick. basically, i suggested we go to a new year's party as a real "date" or whatever and she just turned into my girlfriend. but ... she also explained that she had never dated anyone before (!!!) and it's become clear that she's just my friend who is too different to ever be a reasonable girlfriend. she's very religious and acts as such ... i am not. things like that. but she's delicate and vulnerable and i stand to really fuck her up emotionally but she went back to school today and i didn't have the balls to just tell her i didn't want to go on with this charade. now what? in before ghey / pussy / do you even lift thanks in advance, sorry for being so beta
If you can't get past the differences or better yet embrace them to make things more interesting then it's not much of a relationship. I can't see how couples who have the exact same interests don't get bored very quickly. *My advice: You've known her for this long, do her the justice of not breaking up by phone or text.
Long distance is no way to start a relationship, especially when you're 19. Neither of you even know who you are yet.
Man up and tell her that it's not going to work. That's better than stringing her along and damaging her fragile christian world.
let's say I man up: do I get to call her? do I have to wait until I actually see her next? do I have to drive up there? it's all very difficult trying not to destroy a 19 year old girl's feelings
That's your first problem. You're going to destroy her feelings. It's going to happen. You're going to feel like an asshole. You're going to look like an asshole. Get over it. Call her. Explain yourself. Break up with her. I would say do it in person but if you're not into her and you have awhile to see her then there's no point. Plus you'll probably suck at feigning interest and not even put in enough effort to qualify as half assing your relationship. So you call her. You tell the truth. You apologize and you let her cry at you. Then you move on.
Best advice about teenage girls I can give: Don't give a shit about them. Fuck them (literally and figuratively). Nothing matter in life will ever concern you with other teenage girls (until you got a daughter that age), so focus your attention on something else like having fun instead.
If she's that religious you might as well marry her? And btw, this thread needs pics for an adequate response. Preferably nudes ;-)
I feel like I should mention that I'm also afraid that letting this play out, the more damaging it will be to our friendship ... which has been long and very rewarding. it's just such a shitty situation and totally my fault
If she is religious then leave her to Jesus. If she wonders why you have stopped talking to her then tell her you are saving yourself for Mary the mother of Jesus when you get to heaven and have vowed to stay pure by staying away from women. If you tell her that she might get jealous and try to have sex with you. There are two types of religious women. 1.Sex Freaks 2.Prude Freaks that are saving themselves for Jesus. It sounds like this girl is the second type of religious girl. I would save yourself the trouble and stay far away.
I am way way too experienced with this situation TS. My advice is keep her close but don't date her. Find a girl closer to your style. Hardest breakup I ever went through was with a girl like that. Don't go after it unless you think you're going to marry her. Which should not be the case considering you're 19. But if you're anything like me, you'll just take this as a challenge and do it anyways. But don't do that.
what I'm most considering doing is waiting a week or two and letting it just get uncomfortable for both of us and politely call off this "experiment" ... but it's never that easy, is it. if it were clear that acting quickly was the best idea, I would have probably done it tonight.
