I haven't had a day off in a month (advice thread)

[method115]

not talking about not caring about the food. you shouldnt care about the restaurant for the sake of the owner, who you dislike, when weighing your priorities involving family. Him saying the restaurant would close without you should have no affect on your decision.

Agreed with this. I would never care about this at all. In fact the owner telling me this would only make me force him to give me days off and most likely a percentage of the restaurant.

 

[KreamPuff]

What about giving your Mom and Sister a timeline? Give your Mom 6 months to find a new stream or if they can't sustain the home without your help, maybe it's best to sell the house and downsize.

I don't work in food service industry, but it sounds like you have all the leverage with the boss. I don't see why you can't demand a raise and easily find another restaurant to work at. Threaten to go to the competing noodle bar in town.

 

[TankAbbott4Eva]

You have the upper hand with the boss man, tell him you're thinking of quitting, then profit.

 

[colby25]

I know you probably don't want to hear this but...

Try turning to Jesus Christ, that's what i did when i was stuck between a rock and a hard place.

What do you have to lose my man? Give it a shot you got nothing to lose. As tony evans would say-God can hit a bulls eye with a crooked arrow and take oranges and make lemonade.

I know for me and it took me hitting rock bottom to realize i couldn't do it on my own.

Wish you the best of luck.

 

[KILL KILL]

Your boss and your family are both taking advantage of you. Quit being the whipping boy for everyone.

If your boss claims his restaurant will fail without you, then he should offer you a percentage of ownership because he is obviously incapable of running the business.

Tell your family you will help them out, but temporarily. Set a reasonable timetable in which allows them to get their shit together and you still allows you to keep your sanity.

 

[ithinktheymad]

Oh I'm aware it's a pipe dream lol. I really just want to study under David Chang. I have no clue how chefs can make it out


Basically I'm incapable of not giving a fuck. I will never half ass a dish. I just can't. And as you said as head chef it's my name people see and my face in the pass.


I don't like Chicago too much. I can't handle the cold lol. LA would be nice and I've been considering it. I absolutely loved the time I spent out there. My tax return comes in, I might save it and figure something out. I don't know anyone in LA anymore, and looking up a roomie situation on Craigslist without being able to look around would be sketch.


I'm the head chef. The kitchen is mine even though he owns everything in it. That was agreed upon when I took the promotion. Although he keeps trying to micromanage my kitchen and staff regardless.


Where exactly?



Exactly! That's the problem. If I hire someone I know within one shift if they can make it.

I live for the pressure of a rush and I thrive in it. The ADHD shines in that setting. Its easily what makes me stand out above other chefs and managers. I can work much much faster than many people and when everyone is freaking out and can't handle it I'm smiling and laughing. The chaos of a service is my favorite place to be.

And thanks guys I really appreciate all the advice. I'm trying to get my mind right, hitting the gym and the pool today, there's a submission grappling tourney next month the day of the Conor fight I'm going to do, so something to work towards is going to help.

Also turns out I do have another job offer that I thought fell through. It's for 35k as the head chef of a high end pub opening up. I might take it, but I'm stuck in Tulsa again. I'm filling out fafsa stuff for for the CIA (culinary school, best in the world) and work on my technique for a few years, study my balls off and come out with all my experience and use that to experiment and work on my recipes.

So again rock and a hard place.

I looked on Culinary Agents like 2 seconds ago, and I'm seeing mostly Sous in L.A. one I think with Bill Chait pedigree. New York has exec and Exec Sour leaking out the asshole. Make a profile man Skype with some of these. Maybe you get a better offer and send some bills back home!

 

[ironwolf]

So I share my personal life on here a lot. If you don't know I'm the head chef of a noodle bar in a swank part of town. My boss is clueless, underpays me, and I work my ass off every day to send out the best food I can , as head chef the success of this restaurant means just as much to me as the owner.

But it's been over a month since I've had a day off. Three times a week my right hand basically quits working now, and my body is in so much pain I can't train BJJ. I've not done stand up in a month, just too exhausted.

I moved back to Tulsa for " a month" to help my mother with bills. She lost her business, her car and she was going through a divorce so I moved in (my sister got rid of her beautiful apartment and moved in to the same house with her son to help as well) my mother says is I move out she loses the house, my sister says if I do I'm ruining my nephews life, my boss says if I quit he loses the restaurant and I cost everyone their jobs .

What would my Sherbros do in this situation?

I don't know but you are probably the only person on sherdog who has ever had a rough patch in life and a job you weren't 100% in love with.

But for Srs, I'd tell the boss to fuck off and meet some of your demands or risk losing you. If he is so scared of losing his business if he loses you then he should try harder to make you want to work for him. If he can't do that, then that's on him, not you.

It's you're life brosef, it's not right to suffer becaus somebody else wants to place blame on you instead of themselves.