I’ve been out of MMA coverage for a year...

Discussion in 'UFC Discussion' started by FootstompShonie, Jan 21, 2020.

  1. FootstompShonie

    FootstompShonie Silver Belt

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    Can you fucks all give me your best 1-2 year synopsis of what’s been occurring in MMA? Listen, I’m an old head moron who has looked at wiki results due to real life. Give me something!

    And please no videos of fights I haven’t paid for the PPVs

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    But come on fuckers, give me something, did Khabib kill someone in Dagestan? Do we have some cool new ESPN promo like JDS in front of the fire from FOX?

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    Has Uber TS finally taken his title in the heavyweight division?

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    How has Obama been doing?

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    Last edited: Jan 21, 2020
  2. 20falarVerdades

    20falarVerdades Silver Belt

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    1. Jones further solidified himself as the GOAT by finishing DC and Gus
    2. Conor has a thrilling rivalry with Khabib, specially after the bus incident(Conor was arrested). The irishman lost the first fight, but the rematch is bound to happen soon
    3. Kamaru Usman has been looking unbeatable at WW, he has elite wrestling with superhuman cardio and is huge. The division is clearly evolved with guys like him, Colby and Masvidal. The latter won the "Baddest Motherfucker" belt in a lopsided beatdown against Nate Diaz
    4. Adesanya is the man to be beat at MW, but many agree that the Natty Goat Paulo Borrachinha is the future
    5. Henry Cejudo (Triple C) reigns supreme in the lower divisions after Dillashaw got USADA'd
     
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  3. SmoothPies

    SmoothPies Blue Belt

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    But come on fuckers, give me something, did Khabib kill someone in Dagestan?
    -Not that we know of

    Do we have some cool new ESPN promo like JDS in front of the fire from FOX?
    -Something far worse:
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    Has Uber TS finally taken his title in the heavyweight division?
    -We haven't seen him yet

    How has Obama been doing?
    https://www.instagram.com/barackobama
     
    Wizzlebiz likes this.
  4. FootstompShonie

    FootstompShonie Silver Belt

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    What the fuck Mighty Mouse fights in Pride 0.2 now?
     
  5. Jormungandr

    Jormungandr Ice & Fire belt

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  6. Rear Naked Toke

    Rear Naked Toke Orange Belt

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    Is UberTS still on here?
     
  7. myjohnson9

    myjohnson9 GOAT

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    All you need to know is jones got busted for steroids again. gsp is still ducking contenders at MW and WW! And Fedor knocked out Rampage, Mir and Chael in a few minutes combined
     
  8. Cylence

    Cylence Flying Arlovski Belt

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    Heavyweight: DC moved up and beat Stipe for the belt. He then defended the title against Derrick Lewis, who's balls were hot at the time (definitely look into this one, comedy gold) and easily finished him. He spent the next six months lobbying for a Brock Lesnar fight instead of giving Stipe a rematch. That fell through, so he gave Stipe a rematch and got murked, primarily by body shots.

    LHW: Jones decimated Gus, won a wide decision over Smith, and had a close fight with Thiago Santos. Yes, that Thiago Santos. Rockhold and Weidman moved up and got blasted the fuck out.

    MW: Adesanya burst onto the scene and is now the man to beat. Weidman, Rockhold, and Jacare are all essentially irrelevant to the title picture. A guy named Paulo Costa, who is definitely all natural, is now the biggest threat to his supremacy.

    WW: Jorge Masvidal is quite possibly the second biggest attraction in the sport. Bet ya didn't see that one coming lmao.

    LW: Khabib smesh Al, Khabib smesh Conor, Khabib smesh Dustin. Justin Gaethje is actually somewhat defensively responsible now. Uh, Tony thought his son was the second coming of Jesus Christ, and threw holy water on his wife. Conor became an alcoholic, punched an old man in a bar, and...you know what, Conor's done too much in the last year for me to list.

    FW: Eh.

    BW: TJ tried to go down to FLW to kill the division as per Dana White's request, but got smashed, and then failed for EPO. Cruz is still injured, but I'm sure you didn't need me to tell ya that.

    FLW: In anticipation for killing the FLW division, the UFC started releasing many flyweight fighters. Then Cejudo whooped TJ, so the division stayed, but...with less fighters. Joe Benavidez is still the #2 in the division. Ah, some things never change.

    Other: B.J. Penn was knocked out by a drunk, fat Hawaiian in a street fight. Jon Fitch is still a blanket.

    TL;DR: It is an absolute wild mess, as per the usual.
     
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  9. LastBlood

    LastBlood Yellow Card Yellow Card

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    Why were u in prison TS?
     
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  10. Mortal Wombat

    Mortal Wombat Silver Belt

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    Australia and New Zealand now dominate America. Brazilian dudes can't hang. Dagestan produces some high level fighters. Oh you missed the greatest KO of all time. Mazzygoat lad.
     
  11. Cooliox

    Cooliox Steel Belt Platinum Member

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    WMMA still sucks
     
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  12. MEAN357

    MEAN357 Pernell Whitaker belt

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    There's like 7000 different belts now
     
  13. 22k

    22k ベルセルク

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    Overeem got KTFOd 900 times.

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  14. AmericanMMA

    AmericanMMA Yellow Card Yellow Card

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    UberTS needs to make a comeback
     

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