I agree successful marriage takes a certain kind of idealism that's hard to find these days. The most difficult part imo is a lot of people think they're ready for such a commitment, and talk a big game about how much they want it.
But feelings fade and marriage doesn't enhance those feelings or make them permanent. At the end of the day that level of commitment takes more than feelings. It takes resolution and a level of morality a lot of people aren't capable of.
Not to sound like I'm on a high horse but it's really true. I remember female coworkers and acquaintances as well as male friends being surprised by the way I carried myself.
One girl remarked it's like you don't even notice other women exist. I told her romantically they don't for me anymore. I've pledged my life to my wife and that's it for me as far as women go.
I believe you have to live with that mindset if you really want a marriage to succeed. There's no barrier to cheating or other levels of inappropriate intimacy other than the barriers you impose. You need to live your life in such a way that breaking your vows simply isn't an option.
You shouldn't have a problem with sounding like you're on your high horse. You exhibit certain traits that are praise worthy and rare and you deserve to be able to take pride in them. Fuck humility for the sake of not offending puny mortals around you.
No need to tell me about people being in awe of your high fidelity since I am and always was in the same boat. What people usually can't comprehend is that in my case, there is literally no struggle involved to keep it that way, it comes off naturally. I might notice a good looking girl on the street but it's not as if not banging her is gonna plague my thoughts, quite the contrary - she's out of my mind as soon as she's out of my sight. Even when I was forced to be around attractive women, it never messed with my mind in that regard. That's because, to me, aesthetics is such a complex notion that encompasses a lot more than mere physical appearance, even a lot more than entire sensual experience. For instance, a woman can be delightful to see, hear, touch, smell and taste; if she's uneducated or uncultivated - everything goes down the drain.
More importantly, even if she meets all the standards there's still the problem of incompatibility. Every person is a unique, unfinished mosaic out on the quest to not only find its missing pieces in a partner but also fill partner's own missing pieces with his. Perfect matches are indeed a rare thing since they require introspection on both partners' parts as well as an uncompromising attitude when it comes to presenting yourself to potential partners, being that most people find themselves unworthy and uninteresting and therefore create personas/images that serve to attract the object of their desire. What they fail to understand is that sending away misinformation about yourself to your partner is gonna bite you in the ass down the road. I have countless examples to back this claim, some of them are insanely amusing.
Anyway, most important thing is to not give up on these virtues you possess. Don't let people talk you into renouncing them on the grounds of world being a horrific, Noir film like place where everyone is cynical and devoid of honor and ideals. Fearlessly communicate your seemingly outlandish outlooks to every potential woman with whom you're in the process of developing a relationship, with little regard to how you might come across. I guarantee you, most of them will be impressed by you because people's most intimate yearning is to have these virtues you have coupled with strong faith in some ideal, such as love. It doesn't mean they'll necessarily follow in your footsteps but it'll certainly raise your chances of inspiring alike individuals to not succumbing to all-present apathy and cynicism.
I refused to compromise and it has done wonders for me. Sure, some girls I had been with looked upon me as an unrealistic, romantic daydreamer and even ridiculed me for it but each and every one of them felt a glimpse of my passion's strength at one point. What kept them from jumping on board was their mundane opinion of themselves. They lacked divine and therefore presupposed everyone else did, too. Guess what happened to them? They all ended up having mediocre relationships and ultimately lives.
Persevere in your quest. That's what it's about.
"And a new day will dawn for those who stand long and the forests will echo with laughter."
