Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by SouthoftheAndes, Aug 3, 2016.
Things you wish yout knew?
Lol fourth? I'd give up.
I missed warning signs because I was busy working a lot trying to provide for us. Honestly the whole experience crushed any desire to be in a relationship.
It was mostly the complete lack of regard from someone you've done so much for.
It was like she flipped a switch and couldn't even pretend to give a fuck. Left me disillusioned with the idea of loyalty.
Holy fuck yikes. Seriously tho my dad is on his 4th...it's good for me to hear stories like Mike90 just to remind me never been married and never will. Fuck that mess.
Honestly I don't see a ton of benefit in getting married these days. It's basically just a romantic gesture that can have a ton of downside to it, but only for guys.
You also have to roll the dice you're with a levelheaded girl that wants to get married for the right reason, and not just a girl that wants to have a big party.
As much as you think you really know someone, you hardly ever do.
My first wife turned out to be a lesbian but we had a kid.
My second wife I thought I loved but I really didn't. I guess it was a way for me to get over a girl I did love.
My third wife was the girl I loved previous to my 2nd wife that cost me my marriage to my 2nd wife. We were drunk and got married in Vegas. After we found out what happened I wasn't one to complain and kept it from her but once she found out she wanted to get a divorce immediately and so we did.
I'm currently in a relationship with my third wife, we have a daughter together. She was leaving on a plane for a new job and I tried to meet her at an airport to tell her how much I love her but I missed her...
or so I thought...
She didn't get on the plane and we're currently in a relationship. She's about to be my 4th marriage.
I'm happily unmarried with my I guess girlfriend if you want to call her that at this point, we have 2 kids and a house and have been together for almost ten years, I just never saw the point in dropping that much cash into a party
Long story short. Found out my wife was having a year long affair with someone she worked with. I had been suspecting it just from the odd way she started acting (more trips to see her mom or more girl nights out type of deals) and eventually looked at her emails. I found it all right there. They'd been talking shit about me for a while as well. I felt pretty betrayed as you might guess and kicked her out of the house. I'm lucky he lived out of town because I went on a drive to hurt him and eventually came to my senses. If he had lived close I would probably be in jail now. She stayed with him for a while and caught him cheating on her. He was married with kids so they wrecked two marriages. He was in local politics and had to drop out because all of this. A real low life dbag. I moved on and found someone better but I'm a little untrusting of females in general as you would imagine.
Got about a paragraph in before I realized this is Ross from friends.
I don't believe humans are meant to be monogamous for long term. Actually science had proven this. We did not evolve to this point by taking the Christian view to marriage and family.
If you arent religious like that then why marry? You make some good points. If a person accepts evolution as true then accepting that humans aren't naturally monogamous creatures also isn't that hard (and it is true).
I am young myself. And don't think most people are bad (even the cheaters). I just think peopLe get selfish and often play to natural animalistic instincts.
this is pretty accurate for me. It could have worked if I stayed the same passive mangina of a man but I couldn't do that for another 15 years.
It was boned from the get go though. She was dumb. So stupid. Hot but stupid. Beauty fades.
Yeah this is how I feel pretty much. If you look in previous generations marriages were held together by necessity, societal pressures, and lack of options.
These days you can have kids if you want without marrying. You're not shunned if you decide to leave or to cheat, most people really don't care that much. All the social networking keeps people constantly aware other options are out there.
What we call love is just a surge of hormones to get us to breed. Eventually that chemical high fades, and when it does you need someone perfectly compatible with you and willing to stay with one person for life.
Even when things aren't fun and easy. Most people just aren't wired for it.
Movies and pop culture lie to us about what relationships are like, and things are so different than they were for our grandparents that were forced into monogamy.
when people tell me about their 3rd marriage (more common than I thought) I always ask why?
if the first 2 didn't work what's the point of a 3rd? if I were to get divorced I'd be done
Damn. I could have written this exact same post myself.
Theyre optimistic ?
Still on my first ,been 12 years just had our first kid a year and a half ago .theres been times that were hard ,like some have said ,to much work and taking for granted that your relationship will hold together but it dosnt U have to make times for your spouse and your kids and maybe even listen when she talks
The rest of us didn't catch that, because we've never watch Friends, because we're not gay.
I caught it. Because I watched it.
With my first wife.
EDIT - Ontopic, I've never been married. Probably never will.
Really what are we 12?
I've never dated a girl that didn't like crappy sitcoms. Better friends than king of queens or everybody loves Raymond imo.
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