help, falling in love with a friend. what are my options

[ralphc1]

Having over 60 years of experience with the human female, the ladder theory is pretty spot on. Studies have been done showing that women decide within minutes of meeting a man whether he is someone she would have sex with.

Women clearly put men they like into friend or lovers categories and different levels within of those categories. Ladders are a good analogy. If there are 2 ladders against a wall with some distance between. You don't jump from one to the other. You go down the ladder you're on, go to the other one and climb up. You get off one to get on the other one. In the past it often happened with distance.

When I was 16, my family moved and I found out being the new guy in school was a good thing as I wasn't on the women's friend ladder. At the city I moved from, the girls in high school were all ones I knew from the age of 12 or before. At 16 when I wanted to date them we were just friends. Sophomore girls dated Junior or Senior guys that they weren't already friends with. When I went back for a football or basketball game, I was able to hook up with the girls who wouldn't date me the previous year. I had gotten off the friend ladder by my absence.

I noticed that ignoring women works when a male friend of mine was trying to pick up a girl he liked in college that I was friends with. I would find somebody else to talk to to give him a chance to talk to her. After a couple of weeks my friend decided he wasn't getting anywhere with her and he and I started going to different places and I didn't see her for a couple of weeks. The next time I did see her she was leaning on me. I was sitting on a bar stool and she was straddling my leg and rubbing herself on my knee. I asked her what she was doing and she said she was horny and I should take her home. I told her she had said she didn't think of me that way and my friend would love to take her home.

Maybe TS would be better off to be busy for a while.

 

[KreamPuff]

Thanks for the great advice people. We agreed to see each other in a few days after her exams are over. I will tell her then.

Good luck, and whatever you do, keep us updated.

 

[storenut47]

Clearly a mix tape is all that is needed

 

[Goonerview]

every friendship I ever had with a woman before I got married, they knew I'd fuck them if they wanted me to fuck them. almost 100% of my teenage casual sex was with a female friend that I cared about as a friend. been married since forever, and I'm sure adult sex between friends is gonna be complicated, but that still makes what I read in that site bullshit. A girl can take the fact you want her, they love that.

Yeah, the article says something like "women only date guys with money 50% of the time" ... or something to that effect. Which is wrong. Money will get you access to top quality women, but if your game is weak and you have no personality, you ain't getting laid.

Most, almost all, of the women I've ever been in a serious relationship with were richer/wealthier than me.

That article is full of nonsense.

 

[Pugilistic]

Yeah, the article says something like "women only date guys with money 50% of the time" ... or something to that effect. Which is wrong. Money will get you access to top quality women, but if your game is weak and you have no personality, you ain't getting laid.

Most, almost all, of the women I've ever been in a serious relationship with were richer/wealthier than me.

That article is full of nonsense.

Every time I hear a guy say women only date guys with money, I think they must have shit game. I dated chicks when I was poor as fuck, living with my parents, with no steady job and no car. Even though I have more money now (still poor though), my dating life has dwindled now that I don't go out as much and have less time to meet women. I was forced to have better game then because I had to convince chicks to buy something for me and always go back to their place to fuck.

 

[Goonerview]

Having over 60 years of experience with the human female, the ladder theory is pretty spot on. Studies have been done showing that women decide within minutes of meeting a man whether he is someone she would have sex with.

Women clearly put men they like into friend or lovers categories and different levels within of those categories. Ladders are a good analogy. If there are 2 ladders against a wall with some distance between. You don't jump from one to the other. You go down the ladder you're on, go to the other one and climb up. You get off one to get on the other one. In the past it often happened with distance.

When I was 16, my family moved and I found out being the new guy in school was a good thing as I wasn't on the women's friend ladder. At the city I moved from, the girls in high school were all ones I knew from the age of 12 or before. At 16 when I wanted to date them we were just friends. Sophomore girls dated Junior or Senior guys that they weren't already friends with. When I went back for a football or basketball game, I was able to hook up with the girls who wouldn't date me the previous year. I had gotten off the friend ladder by my absence.

I noticed that ignoring women works when a male friend of mine was trying to pick up a girl he liked in college that I was friends with. I would find somebody else to talk to to give him a chance to talk to her. After a couple of weeks my friend decided he wasn't getting anywhere with her and he and I started going to different places and I didn't see her for a couple of weeks. The next time I did see her she was leaning on me. I was sitting on a bar stool and she was straddling my leg and rubbing herself on my knee. I asked her what she was doing and she said she was horny and I should take her home. I told her she had said she didn't think of me that way and my friend would love to take her home.

Maybe TS would be better off to be busy for a while.

You call it "ladder theory", I call it "friendship v lover vibe" ... The guy who wrote that arricle is waaaaay over-complicating women and is just plain wrong in many areas.

I agree, if you want to have sex with a girl, you have to give off the "lover vibe" and you won't sleep with her giving off the "friendship vibe" ... The only person who puts you in the friendzone, is yourself.

 

[fightingrabbit]

I noticed that ignoring women works when a male friend of mine was trying to pick up a girl he liked in college that I was friends with. I would find somebody else to talk to to give him a chance to talk to her. After a couple of weeks my friend decided he wasn't getting anywhere with her and he and I started going to different places and I didn't see her for a couple of weeks. The next time I did see her she was leaning on me. I was sitting on a bar stool and she was straddling my leg and rubbing herself on my knee. I asked her what she was doing and she said she was horny and I should take her home. I told her she had said she didn't think of me that way and my friend would love to take her home.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand thennn... you put it in her butt...riiight?

 

[fightingrabbit]

Thanks for the great advice people. We agreed to see each other in a few days after her exams are over. I will tell her then.

I need to ask, how old are you TS?

LOL Please update us when she tells you she thinks you're a really great, funny guy but she doesn't really feel the same way and that you two should continue to be good friends. Dude if she wants you, she'll let it be known. The fact that that she hasn't, means she doesn't. You said she'll do flirty things like smack your thigh or poke your ribs. Only cause she wants attention. Girls do that all the time.

Don't be the guy in the dancing video TS. Please. For all our sakes. The fact that you're using the word "love" in your thread title makes me cringe already and feel that this is the way it's gonna go down. As much as I want to laugh, cringe, and say "I told you so" at your inevitable rejection thread update, I don't want to see you crash and burn. Not this way.

Either go for the mack when you guys hang next or don't do anything at all. ESPECIALLY talking your feelings. Think action. Words should be the last thing on your mind.

Talking time is ova'.

Also post some pics of her so we can better determine your situation.

 

[ScriptReadsMe]

I need to ask, how old are you TS?

LOL Please update us when she tells you she thinks you're a really great, funny guy but she doesn't really feel the same way and that you two should continue to be good friends. Dude if she wants you, she'll let it be known. The fact that that she hasn't, means she doesn't. You said she'll do flirty things like smack your thigh or poke your ribs. Only cause she wants attention. Girls do that all the time.

Don't be the guy in the dancing video TS. Please. For all our sakes. The fact that you're using the word "love" in your thread title makes me cringe already and feel that this is the way it's gonna go down. As much as I want to laugh, cringe, and say "I told you so" at your inevitable rejection thread update, I don't want to see you crash and burn. Not this way.

Either go for the mack when you guys hang next or don't do anything at all. ESPECIALLY talking your feelings. Think action. Words should be the last thing on your mind.

Talking time is ova'.

Also post some pics of her so we can better determine your situation.

Lool. Nice guess! I didn't have to wait till next week to get some clarity of the situation. Apparently she saw through my strings of flirts that I was looking for more. Said i was a nice person and friend but that she doesn't think we're on the same page (not sure what this means) and she'd hate to lose our friendship. But she said she might be wrong. Does this leave an opening? Will i have to climb down the ladder of friendship and embark the other one

Edit: i'm 30

 

[blaseblah]

You can usually tell when a friend is into you. At least I can. She asks you to hang out all the time, finds excuses to be alone with you, and gets physical with you when hanging out, like constantly touching you in the middle of conversation.

If shes not doing any of that, I wouldn't say a word.

 

[mrsenor]

there is a reason why she is you friend and not your gf

 

[fightingrabbit]

Lool. Nice guess! I didn't have to wait till next week to get some clarity of the situation. Apparently she saw through my strings of flirts that I was looking for more. Said i was a nice person and friend but that she doesn't think we're on the same page (not sure what this means) and she'd hate to lose our friendship. But she said she might be wrong. Does this leave an opening? Will i have to climb down the ladder of friendship and embark the other one

Edit: i'm 30

post some pics of her so we can better determine your situation.

Also..

 

[Goonerview]

Lool. Nice guess! I didn't have to wait till next week to get some clarity of the situation. Apparently she saw through my strings of flirts that I was looking for more. Said i was a nice person and friend but that she doesn't think we're on the same page (not sure what this means) and she'd hate to lose our friendship. But she said she might be wrong. Does this leave an opening? Will i have to climb down the ladder of friendship and embark the other one

Edit: i'm 30

Dude, the "ladder" theory is bullshit. "Climbing up a relationship ladder" ... Seriously??? Listen to yourself *vom* .... The whole idea behind "ladder theory" makes it as though she is on a pedestal and you have to "climb" a ladder to "have the chance to get with her". It's so beta, dude. Think about it. ... You are the pauper and she is the princess, no woman is ever gonna get turned on by a man with this underlying mindset.

She probably thought you were acting strange and girly/flirty around her and decided to tell you straight that she ain't interested.

Women want a man that acts more like a man than they do.

YouTube, game 101 and game 202 with Todd Valentine. Get a pen and pad out and take some notes! Read "way of the superior man" and other books like it. Focus on bettering yourself, go out and buy some fine ass shoes, watches, suits. Buy some fresh cologne, get a fresh haircut. Treat yourself and love yourself. Act more like a man, the women will come.

The game is frustrating, but you gotta learn.

 

[HomerThompson]

LOL at having friendships with women.

 

[ithinktheymad]

Serious question TS, do you think you think she's attracted to you and if so why?

 

[MassDistortion]

Cum in an envelop and put it in her mail box.

If she can't recognize your sent, she's not worth the hassle.

what in the living fuck? Dude if you're jacking off into envelopes something is seriously wrong with you.