Have you ever given someone nutrition advice and they reject it?

[mixmastermo]

I'm in the best shape I've ever been in my entire life right now. I have always worked out, somewhat regularly since high school, but for the past year and a half, I've really stepped up my game. For reference, I'm kind built like Pat Barry (5'10, 230ish lbs). 48 inch chest, 33 inch waist.

So you'd think that someone that isn't in such good shape might wanna listen to my advice, right? I have a friend that I've known since high school and he's seen my transformation over the years. He wants to get in better shape. He has a desk job but he is pretty active-- he plays roller hockey a few nights a week, goes to the gym occasionally and goes hiking sometimes. He is not in good shape. He weighs a lot less than me but he has much much more body fat.

He was talking to me about how he does all this stuff but keeps gaining weight. How he eats a healthy diet but doesn't get results. I suggested that he might not be eating enough yesterday. He kinda just brushed off the idea. Today he told me he consumed only 600 calories and he plans on playing hockey tonight. I was like whoooaaa bad idea. I sent him some articles on how not eating enough can actually lower your metabolism and lead to fat production, because your body basically thinks it is starving itself.

Long story short, it turned into an argument and he decided he is only going to consume 1500 calories a day and workout every day. He weighs 180. He didn't give a crap about anything I said or anything in the articles I sent him.

Soooo frustrating....

 

[Cronk]

Proximity Bias. People tend to trust the authority of strangers over their friends/family. Good article on the issue here--> TESTOSTERONE NATION | Proximity Bias: A Discussion - Page 1

 

[mixmastermo]

Proximity Bias. People tend to trust the authority of strangers over their friends/family. Good article on the issue here--> TESTOSTERONE NATION | Proximity Bias: A Discussion - Page 1

Interesting...

But he isn't trusting the advice of anyone on this. I mean.. he is not a dumb guy. He is quite intelligent and I would expect him to be resourceful enough to do some kind of research on this issue. I was kinda just pointing him in the right direction when I sent him those articles.

Wow I just read the whole article. It basically summed up my feelings perfectly. Crazy.

It's funny like, my out-of-shape co-workers often see me eating heavy in the morning (lots of carbs) and they're always like "that's not good for you" and I think to myself "who are you to tell me anything.. I am chiseled, your gut falls below your belt line" but I usually just keep my mouth shut. If they don't get it yet, then there's nothing left to say.

 

[EdmondDantes]

you can drag a horse to water but you cant make it drink.

 

[Mumrik]

I've never given nutritional advice and had it respected.

I have however mostly ended up in those conversations with "I can't gain weight" people, and they tend to be working with some serious denial issues...

They won't accept that they might actually not know what it means to eat a lot and that milk with 0.1% fat doesn't really count for shit.

 

[Mumrik]

Proximity Bias. People tend to trust the authority of strangers over their friends/family. Good article on the issue here--> TESTOSTERONE NATION | Proximity Bias: A Discussion - Page 1

This answer was hilarious:

Jesus said to them, "Only in his hometown and in his own house is a prophet without honor."

 

[mixmastermo]

I used to get annoyed when I hear people in the gym giving others bad advice, or even just getting all up in their business trying to teach "proper form", but damn, I think people rejecting nutrition advice is a far worse annoyance.

 

[JerkWeed]

Well, I understand people not taking unsolicited advice. Nobody likes to feel like they're being talked down to.

It's funny like, my out-of-shape co-workers often see me eating heavy in the morning (lots of carbs) and they're always like "that's not good for you"

You are not alone there, successful people get "corrected" all the time. I don't understand the mentality. If I see somebody succeed at something I am failing at why would they need me to "correct" them?

 

[mixmastermo]

Well, I understand people not taking unsolicited advice. Nobody likes to feel like they're being talked down to.



You are not alone there, successful people get "corrected" all the time. I don't understand the mentality. If I see somebody succeed at something I am failing at why would they need me to "correct" them?

In response to the bolded:

The advice was not exactly unsolicited. He was telling me he and some other guys were talking about how they are all very active and eat well but can't get in shape. I then listened to him talk about how he eats and what activities he partakes in and I simply said he might not be eating enough. I mean, the fact that he was talking to me about being frustrated with his situation implies that he needs direction, right? It's not like I went to him and said "you're out of shape, do this"

 

[Blackice]

I find it's easier to let the people who really have no intention of doing anything fail and use your time on yourself to keep getting the good results. If people are actually serious about taking advice they don't question it after asking you or act like they know what they're doing. Caring too much about what happens to people aroound us, especially people we care about is a burden to say the least, because more often than not, they just continue on with their blinders on and their earplugs in. I used to spend a lot of time trying to convince people to care about themselves and being frustrated with the results, but the bottom line is...if they don't care then why should you? When they're truly serious they'll actually DO something to show you that, and not just for a week.

 

[GJJNY]

All the time, thats why I stopped and started answering the same questions with 'I dunno'.

The (not so) funny thing is when their doctor tells them they're morbidly obese, a shoe in for type 2 diabetes, can die from their obesity and yet they continue to eat fast food and in horrible quantities to boot. Oh, but that 30 minutes in the gym every 3 days is sure to reverse it all. Fuck it, who cares, look out for numero uno and call it a day.

 

[XTrainer]

1. Give unsolicited advice only very sparingly, in the most urgent circumstances. Generally speaking, people who have not asked for advice hate being advised.
2. Apply rule #1 even more rigidly to nutrition, because everyone thinks they already know everything about nutrition to begin with, and take advice contrary to their "knowledge" as a personal attack.

 

[mixmastermo]

1. Give unsolicited advice only very sparingly, in the most urgent circumstances. Generally speaking, people who have not asked for advice hate being advised.
2. Apply rule #1 even more rigidly to nutrition, because everyone thinks they already know everything about nutrition to begin with, and take advice contrary to their "knowledge" as a personal attack.

Yea I see this now. I just wish the rule would include directions for people who think they know what they are doing and complain about not getting any results.

Rule 3 (for misinformed dieters): If you won't take advice from people and you don't get the results you want, then STFU
:icon_chee

 

[Red Harvest]

All of the time. I have a kid who works for me and is also training for his first MMA fight. He's about 5'8" 155 lbs or so and is trying o cut to 135. Hang the fact that he has his first fight in 8 weeks and has only been training for 6 months (don't get me started). He habitually comes to me with questions about supplements, when to eat, how to eat and all that crap. I answer his questions to the best of my ability and even give him advice on what foods will help his body perform better for the sport. I have also revamped his workouts for him so he has ample recovery time and can build lean muscle mass while reaching his goal of 135.

That being said, I have seen him come into work every day with Wendy's, Taco Bell or Chic-Fila. He continues to once a day and refuses to eat vegetables because he "doesn't like them." Now when he comes to ask me a question, I give him ridiculous advice to amuse myself because I know damn good and well that he will not listen.

 

[veganjiujitsu]

People refuse to follow my GONAD -- gallon of natto a day -- diet because they are afraid of eXXXtreme! results.

 

[mixmastermo]

All of the time. I have a kid who works for me and is also training for his first MMA fight. He's about 5'8" 155 lbs or so and is trying o cut to 135. Hang the fact that he has his first fight in 8 weeks and has only been training for 6 months (don't get me started). He habitually comes to me with questions about supplements, when to eat, how to eat and all that crap. I answer his questions to the best of my ability and even give him advice on what foods will help his body perform better for the sport. I have also revamped his workouts for him so he has ample recovery time and can build lean muscle mass while reaching his goal of 135.

That being said, I have seen him come into work every day with Wendy's, Taco Bell or Chic-Fila. He continues to once a day and refuses to eat vegetables because he "doesn't like them." Now when he comes to ask me a question, I give him ridiculous advice to amuse myself because I know damn good and well that he will not listen.

Crazy.

I really wonder what is going through these people's heads. I mean, if you want to be fit, you should listen to someone who is fit. It seems pretty simple. Where is the problem?

 

[mixmastermo]

Crazy.

I really wonder what is going through these people's heads. I mean, if you want to be fit, you should listen to someone who is fit. It seems pretty simple. Where is the problem?

The reason I like GSP so much is because I admire his work ethic and curiosity. He knows he is not perfect and he listens to criticism. Cain Velasquez is the same way. I mean, both guys show dominance when they fight and they are both clearly a step ahead of their opponents. Before every fight, GSP tells everyone fighter x will be his biggest test. He does not take any fight lightly and aims to improve every time he's out there.

These guys did not get where they are thinking they know everything. They are where they are because they acknowledge that no one is perfect and they have to work hard to be the best they can be.

 

[JerkWeed]

The advice was not exactly unsolicited. He was telling me he and some other guys were talking about how they are all very active and eat well but can't get in shape.

Oh man, I hear you now.

People do get defensive when talking about food. They start out as if they want advice but when they start hearing it they retreat behind justifications for what they are currently doing.

inside voice: "Wait, weren't you just complaining that you're not getting the results you want? You're saying more of the same is the fix?"

Or they start listing what they're eating, laying out this disciplined diet that would starve a house cat and leaving the implication that they do everything right and yet their body magically opts out of the laws of physics and gets fatter. It's very insulting. It's like the alcoholic who can't get better because they don't have a drinking problem.

 

[mixmastermo]

Oh man, I hear you now.

People do get defensive when talking about food. They start out as if they want advice but when they start hearing it they retreat behind justifications for what they are currently doing.

inside voice: "Wait, weren't you just complaining that you're not getting the results you want? You're saying more of the same is the fix?"

Or they start listing what they're eating, laying out this disciplined diet that would starve a house cat and leaving the implication that they do everything right and yet their body magically opts out of the laws of physics and gets fatter. It's very insulting. It's like the alcoholic who can't get better because they don't have a drinking problem.

lololol

exactly

I suppose being able to accept advice and criticism is all part of maturing.

 

[Red Harvest]

The reason I like GSP so much is because I admire his work ethic and curiosity. He knows he is not perfect and he listens to criticism. Cain Velasquez is the same way. I mean, both guys show dominance when they fight and they are both clearly a step ahead of their opponents. Before every fight, GSP tells everyone fighter x will be his biggest test. He does not take any fight lightly and aims to improve every time he's out there.

These guys did not get where they are thinking they know everything. They are where they are because they acknowledge that no one is perfect and they have to work hard to be the best they can be.

GSP is one of my favorites. Those examples you just sited are the primary reason why. He is ever evolving and constantly striving to be better. He also understands that nutrition is 80-90% of your training.