Great Quotes or anecdotes

[Rygu]

"Put it in my ass" - Sasha Grey

 

[BisexualMMA]

"Only in a rerun."

- Killian

 

[Cool Hand Luke]

'When in Rome, do the Roman chicks.' - me

 

[SamSchmidt]

Sorry OP, you're probably gonna get few actual meaningful quotes. All threads like this do is activate all of the class clowns.

Yeah but they are amusing.

Dance puppets

 

[JonesBones]

The Useless Tree
- Chuang Tsu

Shih the carpenter was on his way to the state of Chi. When he got to Chu Yuan, he saw an oak tree by the village shrine. The tree was large enough to shade several thousand oxen and was a hundred spans around. It towered above the hilltops with its lowest branches eighty feet from the ground. More than ten of its branches were big enough to be made into boats. There were crowds of people as in a marketplace. The master carpenter did not even turn his head but walked on without stopping.

His apprentice took a long look then ran after Shih the carpenter and said, "Since I took up my ax and followed you, master, I have never seen timber as beautiful as this. But you do not even bother to look at it and walk on without stopping. Why is this?"

Shih the carpenter replied, "Stop! Say no more! That tree is useless. A boat made from it would sink, a coffin would soon rot, a tool would split, a door would ooze sap, and a beam would have termites. It is worthless timber and is of no use. That is why it has reached such a ripe old age."

After Shih the carpenter had returned home, the sacred oak appeared to him in a dream, saying, "What are you comparing me with? Are you comparing me with useful trees? There are cherry, apple, pear, orange, citron, pomelo, and other fruit trees. As soon as the fruit is ripe, the trees are stripped and abused. Their large branches are split, and the smaller ones torn off. Their life is bitter because of their usefulness. That is why they do not live out their natural lives but are cut off in their prime. They attract the attentions of the common world. This is so for all things. As for me, I have been trying for a long time to be useless. I was almost destroyed several times. Finally I am useless, and this is very useful to me."

 

[JonesBones]

 

[JAEGERX]

“Most believe that a satisfactory future requires a return to an idealized past, a past which never in fact existed.”
― Frank Herbert, God Emperor of Dune

 

[Son of Jamin]

This is not some fancy or eloquent quote by Aristotle but from a very successful family member:

The best thing in life is choices, study and work hard to create possibilities!

It truly resonated with me!

 

[Tycho- Taylor's Version]

A master in the art of living draws no sharp distinction between his work and his play; his labor and his leisure; his mind and his body; his education and his recreation. He hardly knows which is which. He simply pursues his vision of excellence through whatever he is doing, and leaves others to determine whether he is working or playing. To himself, he always appears to be doing both

 

[JOE QUEEF]

" 'Cause my balls was hot."

 

[esum80]

 

[ralphc1]

Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't go to the right whorehouses.

Life is like a box of chocolates, somebody else always gets the best ones.

Faith and trust are the lifeblood of charlatans and the hallmark of fools.

 

[Pugilistic]

We're airborne, we're supposed to be surrounded.

 

[Cash Bill 52]

More from the greatest martial artist of all time...

https://bleacherreport.com/articles/1051815-nick-diaz-and-25-of-his-best-quotes#slide0

 

[chubbman]

It’s better to reign in hell than serve in heaven.

 

[AZ103]

A master in the art of living draws no sharp distinction between his work and his play; his labor and his leisure; his mind and his body; his education and his recreation. He hardly knows which is which. He simply pursues his vision of excellence through whatever he is doing, and leaves others to determine whether he is working or playing. To himself, he always appears to be doing both

Nice i like this one and its new to me

 

[zuul]

 

[Dinkin_Flicka]

There is no "I" in denial.

 

[Deleted member 220895]

I got a hand job from Ben Affleck

*BOOM*

Anecdote'd

 

[IDL]

That contradicts the saying "ignorance is bliss "

Being unaware of something is not the same thing as being stupid.

But stupid people are probably unaware more often