Funeral gilf

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by Losfer Words, Feb 12, 2020.

  1. Losfer Words Brown Belt

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    I was at a funeral reception last weekend. There was a pretty older lady who came up to me and started talking. She was an old family friend, she knew me when i was 4-7 years old. She was doing the whole "my my you've gown up havent you" thing. She talked to me the whole time i was there, often about sex. Cupped my ass and kissed my cheek when i left.

    Did not smash, i am happily married but ive felt like driving by the funeral reception place every night just in case.

    Funeral gilfs rule #funeralgilfs
     
  2. OverCoronavirus Pressure Mayberry = War Room, WR = OT. Shit. Banned

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    Robbing the grave, making elderly sexytime
     
  3. ShadBo Brown Belt Platinum Member

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    Literally none of this happened.

    Not TS' story.
    Nothing in this thread.
    Not even this post.
     
  4. Losfer Words Brown Belt

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    <{1-11}>
     
  5. OverCoronavirus Pressure Mayberry = War Room, WR = OT. Shit. Banned

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    "Let's go fuck in the cemetery, get you some practice ahead of your big day."
     
  6. squeakymcgill Blue Belt

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    plot twist: it was the gilf's funeral

    you got molested by a ghost dude
     
  7. RetiredSlave Red Belt

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    Theyre very special. None have been known to exist and theyre all dead now.
     
  8. Chesten_Hesten The Wiener of Steel

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    This calls for a funeral drinking story:
     
  9. -sin- White Belt

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  10. Sakurabaism Black Belt

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    "Grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac" - Chaz
     
  11. Naught2Sixty Red Belt

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    What a way it would have been to commit adultery there, OP. Bang some old poon who didn't give a shit about her dead family member enough to not fantasize with a young buck she knew when they were 7 YEARS OLD. Was that Woody Allen's mom?
     
  12. Milgrim Australopithecus - not your average hominid

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    Yeah, but if you got caught you could play the you-think-I-cheated-with-her-shes-old-enough-to-be-my-grandmother card? Think about it.

    <seedat>

    Oh, and #banfornopics.
     
  13. weed ベルセルク

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    she's right at death's door
    these blue balls, making me sore
    must make her my whore

    [​IMG]
     
  14. AGGAMEMNON66 ———Villain———

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    Where in the fuck are the picks Beavis?
     
  15. mjmj Red Belt

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    WTF!!
    That was completely unnecessary.
     
  16. AGGAMEMNON66 ———Villain———

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    This was a good watch lol
     
  17. Chesten_Hesten The Wiener of Steel

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    Those guys were great
     
  18. Osculater Red Belt

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    That archaic poon can be addictive
     
  19. TankAbbott4Eva Gold Belt

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    There was a 51 year old at our Xmas party last year who appeared to be flirting with me a bit, we took a team photo and she grabbed my hand out of nowhere, told me about her vibrator etc. Later on one of the guys said she would have been good in her day, i said she looked alright right now ha ha
     
  20. SamSchmidt I crossed time for you belt Banned

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    ROFL
     

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