Female Tapping a Male... Would you care personally?

Discussion in 'Grappling Technique' started by bulldogfire, Oct 16, 2013.

  1. bulldogfire

    bulldogfire White Belt

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    OK, yes... so I saw a bit of from the Amanda Leve thread about the idea of a female tapping a male. I wanted to have a different thread and just asks males (I am assuming most here are adults and not teens) how would you feel if you were tapped by a female on the mat at your school or even if it were at a competition?

    Back story... I am female and new to BJJ and a couple months or so back there was a guy I was rolling with. He was new too and I tapped him twice in the roll... technically three times... but the third was due to my nails unfortunately so don't really count that one. Anyway, I felt bad. I have a compassionate heart and even though I think it is super ridiculous allowing ego in between grapplers due to gender... I don't want to embarrass anyone either. I hate making people feel bad but at the end of the day, I am trying to submit you male or female though.

    Honestly, I think it's silly I even have to think about this as a woman if I am rolling with a man. I mean it could even get to be a safety issue for me as if he thinks I am beating him, he may begin to use undue force/spaz/whatever and really hurt me. I am the one generally tapping at this point or just surviving until the clock runs out. However, as I get better, it could become more of an issue... For example, when I am around for a year or more and can beat some guys with only 2-3 months in.

    Do you get embarrassed or have issues being submitted by a woman? Honestly. Did you used to but then got over it? What happened? Do you try to look like you don't but inwardly you can't stand it? Do a lot guys don't have an issue but it's just a few who do?

    If BJJ is supposed to be about leverage and skill instead of strength, what is the big deal about woman submitting a man... just from a logical standpoint? From an ego standpoint is a whole 'nother animal...
     
  2. strike63

    strike63 Green Belt

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    Been tapped by girls a lot never had an issue with it.never has any of the other guys at the gym I used to go to. There was a femal blue belt and she was pretty good so she tapped guys all the time and I don't think she had many issues. Just don't forget to cut your nails.
     
  3. Jackson 2012

    Jackson 2012 Orange Belt

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    If I was you, I wouldn't care what other people think.

    It's their problem to deal with, not yours.

    :)
     
  4. INTERL0PER

    INTERL0PER Brown Belt

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    I don't have a problem with it, but I don't have a problem tapping to anyone.

    You'll run in to douche bags who are insecure and it will bother them, but fuck em, that's their problem. Unless, as you say, they start to spaz and try to get aggressive, but to be honest, this can happen whether your a guy or a girl.

    My best friend and frequent rolling partner gets furious when I tap him and always bull rushes me afterwards :icon_lol:

    At a certain point you can usually deal with spaziness, although it is often dangerous.
     
  5. bulldogfire

    bulldogfire White Belt

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    Yeah... however, as I mentioned above, if a guy does have an issue he may spaz on me in order to not be beat and that could possibly not end too well for me. :eek:
     
  6. SHEWINS

    SHEWINS <img src="http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366

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    Ive been tapped be a girl, I didnt care, it was in judo she's a nice girl and a good training partner, dont see the issue personally. I can see it being an issue for some of the ego driven guys possibly but its not an issue for me.

    Now long nails scratching and digging into me would be an issue.
     
  7. bulldogfire

    bulldogfire White Belt

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    Haha... I am better about the nails now!! LOL
     
  8. SHEWINS

    SHEWINS <img src="http://i1048.photobucket.com/albums/s366

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    Glad to hear it:)
     
  9. HHJ

    HHJ Jeg reiser til mørkets dyp der alt er dødt.

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    I would not. I wouldnt go easy on her either. I really would honestly hate to see a girl quit grappling because guys wouldnt let her be treated equally or part of the team,and thats how people should feel about it imo.
     
  10. Edison Carasio

    Edison Carasio Excellence of execution belt

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    Nope. Skill is skill regardless of gender.
     
  11. BJJ_Rage

    BJJ_Rage Gold Belt

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    well, first of all, you have to consider if the guy was actually letting you tap him. When I was a whitebelt, I used to roll with a couple of chicks in my gym, we both had about the same experience, but I was at least 20 kilos heavier and of course much stronger... I would play around with her and from time to time let her lock some stuff and tap me, never use much strenght to get out of situations... so, if the guy was just having fun with you, I dont see why would he get mad, if the guy is a noob and you have much experience on him, then I dont see why would he get mad, but then, you get the ocacionally muscle head that wants to prove "jiu jitsu" and comes from competitive sports, those guys have pretty big ego, and could really hurt you, so watch out with them, instructor telling him to go easy wont make much of a difference, because, well, he doesnt know how to...
     
  12. ChainFlow

    ChainFlow Brown Belt

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    No, why would it be an issue?

    A couple days ago I almost got put to sleep by a clock choke from a girl at judo. That's what happens when you train with high level grapplers - they catch you sometimes. Male or female.
     
  13. bulldogfire

    bulldogfire White Belt

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    In this case no, he just is not very sure of himself and a bit awkward. When we all tested a month ago to be able to leave the 101 class, he was the one who did not do as well as everyone else.
     
  14. crazyjames1233

    crazyjames1233 Black Belt

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    im sure some guys might. its like a bigger man getting tapped by a smaller man. if the smaller guy has better enough technique to overcome the strength differential he will naturally come out on top. but the bigger guy might have a bruised ego by getting tapped by someone smaller.
     
  15. BJJ Beginner

    BJJ Beginner Green Belt

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    I wouldn't care. That said, I find it interesting that on the one hand you want to be treated equally on the mat, but on the other you don't want your training partner using "undue force" on you. You can't have it both ways: if you truly want to be treated as an equal than you must be willing to be smashed by a larger opponent just as if you were a smaller guy. I find that, with rare exceptions, nobody of either gender wants that to be the case.
     
  16. Johnny Rosa

    Johnny Rosa Banned Banned

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    I once got TKO'ed by a girl, Vanessa, will never forget this.

    I got kicked in the nuts so hard, I went down, didn't see anything for a few seconds and was very nautious. :eek:

    It happens I guess.

    Me and her are still in touch :)
     
  17. HHJ

    HHJ Jeg reiser til mørkets dyp der alt er dødt.

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    if that isnt love what is
     
  18. bulldogfire

    bulldogfire White Belt

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    I never said anything about equal treatment... though I hope that everyone should be treated with respect equally in BJJ. I wasn't speaking about hard rolling per se... but sudden spazzing because the guy sees he is in danger. Equal treatment should also include awareness of who you are rolling with though as a side note... bigger guys with smaller guys, rolling with older person vs a teen, rolling with an injured partner and yes men and women. I don't think it means you have to treat those like glass dolls but communicate more with them about how much force they want in particular.

    That said I am more just wanting to know about if people honestly would be embarrassed to be tapped by a female. So far, everyone says no... that it's those "other guys" that are. Haha...
     
  19. The Apostle

    The Apostle Green Belt

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    Am I the only one? Damned sore thumb. It would bother me slightly if I were to be legitimately tapped by a female jiu-jitseiro. I'm a competitive dude and don't like losing to anyone.

    I have never had the opportunity to roll with an upper belt female so I am certain it would happen, me getting tapped. I also don't believe I have rolled with a woman yet that was truly stronger than me, to the point where say an average female blue belt was not able to apply enough leverage to really force me into tapping before it snapped.

    In training, if they have applied it correctly and a person stronger than her had applied it like she is doing at the moment, like she is doing it the precisely right way but is not strong enough to really cause me tapping pain, I do tap.

    I have seen videos of Hillary beating dudes way back and for one second don't doubt it happens often and would happen to me. I would not want to tap just as much though to Hillary, Gabi, Kyra, the new blue at the gym, Marcelo. That is just me.
     
  20. redaxe

    redaxe Silver Belt

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    It doesn't bother me.

    But then again, one of my BJJ professors is Cindy Hales, so if I did have a problem with tapping to a woman, then, well... I would have a problem.
     

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