Describe some "prison" style food that you've made

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by Brom Bones, Aug 2, 2018.

  1. Brom Bones

    Brom Bones Green Belt

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    I sometimes watch former inmates show you how to make prison food. Highly recommended.

    Anyway, I was eating burritos and ran out of meat and shredded cheese. But I still had a couple of tortillas, so I used bologna (not my favorite lunch meat, but whatever) and cheese slices (like the singles that are individually wrapped).

    Let me tell you something, that shit was brutal. I should have figured out a better way to use the tortillas than that vile crap. Anyway, describe any kind of "prison style" food that you've made.



     
  2. syct23

    syct23 ...ElipsisBelt...

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    I usually stick to lobster and steak, like in Goodfellas...

    You sound poor and unrespected.
     
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  3. SFMMA

    SFMMA Purple Belt

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    I make pruno or hooch on the regs with the produce my mother-in-law grows in her back yard. Lychee, longan, oranges, blackberries, rose petals, etc. You just add a shitload of sugar and some dry active yeast, shake, throw an airlock on top of that bitch for a few days, wait until the fermentation stops, and you've got yourself some SWEETBERRY WINE.



    Also:

     
    Last edited: Aug 2, 2018
  4. TheNinja

    TheNinja Gold Belt

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    I've used a clothes iron to make a tuna melt and a grilled ham and cheese.

    upload_2018-8-2_9-31-5.png
     
  5. Pliny Pete

    Pliny Pete Puts Butts In Seats

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    When I was locked up we had whatever we wanted because some guys from my crew worked in the kitchen
    We had our own tables that no other race was allowed to sit at and we'd tell the homies what we wanted to eat that day and they'd cook it and then tape it in bags under our tables
    We'd get our trays and just sit em on the table and then grab all the good food under the table and take it back down to our living quarters and grub

    One time it was my BFF's birthday so I had the homies make him a big ass birthday cake with frosting and all that shit
    No way we could pull that out and eat it at our tables so we made a young ass little white boy stick the whole cake under his shirt and walk outta the chow hall with it
    That cake was so big he looked like he was wearing a fat suit like Eddie Murphy in Nutty Professor
    We crowded around him and walked out in a group to try and keep him outta sight from the cops at the entrance/exit and we got it out and back down to the yard
    Shit was delicious
     
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  6. OMGstreetfight

    OMGstreetfight Fred Loya Insurance shill

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    I cut the garlic up nice and thin so it dissolves in the sauce.

    I also eat plastic fruit at Target.
     
  7. Pliny Pete

    Pliny Pete Puts Butts In Seats

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    We also made huge spreads every Wednesday which was commissary night
    Take like 10-20 Top Ramen soups, hella bags of Cheetos/Doritos/Fritos, nacho cheese sauce, a few summer sausages all chopped up and a few jars of jalapenos and mix that shit together in a garbage bag full of hot water and let it sit for an hour and you got a delicious casserole

    [​IMG]
     
  8. Pliny Pete

    Pliny Pete Puts Butts In Seats

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    We'd make "tamales" too
    Take the Top Ramens, crush em up and wet em a little bit and then roll it out flat and pound it together to make a "tortilla" and then take a summer sausage and chop it up and mix it with the Top Ramen flavor packet, cheese sauce and jalapenos and water and cook it in the microwave and then put that over the noodle tortilla and roll it up tight like your making a jelly roll and seal it up inside of a bag until it sticks together and then serve and enjoy
     
  9. quantiqus

    quantiqus Brown Belt

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    You rape your roommate and then you tell him to go and make you a sandwich.
     
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  10. supra

    supra Blue Belt Banned

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    Same our cell was right across from the trustees that worked in the kitchen. We had to pay for it tho.
    Frozen school rectangular pizza slices FOR THE MOTHERFUCKING WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Sounds like you did state time I was in county and the food wasnt that great and not much of it. Lost my trustee status and the bologna sandwich for dinner too. 2 meals a day then and if it wasnt for the trustees I woulda starved. People in there were begging to go to state prison cause you ate better and werent locked down 24 hours.
     
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  11. SUSAN

    SUSAN ☆RON MEXICOS QUEER DESIRE BELT☆ Double Yellow Card

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    Ingredient description....cooking method sounds disgusting

    If y'all were white get that Doukhobour religious exemption (obscure russian 18th century shit)
    You go from factory line bologna sandwiches to individually prepared stuffed peppers

    From fake bacon to homemade egg mcmuffins
     
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  12. NakamuraNutShot

    NakamuraNutShot Trumptastic Voyage Banned

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    I regularly make pruno.
     
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  13. newms84

    newms84 Yellow Belt

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    When I was a kid it was Franco American spaghetti, hamburger and onions all fried together in a frying pan. Also, fried burger with brown gravy mixed with instant rice
     
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  14. DarkneT

    DarkneT Small dick gang Platinum Member

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    <{clintugh}>
     
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  15. TankAbbott4Eva

    TankAbbott4Eva Silver Belt

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    Sometimes I'll make like a mince dish if I can't be fucked, basically ground beef with curry powder and some frozen peas and corn, goes ok on toast or on it's own.
     
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  16. Tropodan

    Tropodan Silver Belt Platinum Member

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    Cracking eggs into your mr noodles adds much needed protein, is cheap, and tastes good.
     
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  17. Scott Parker 27

    Scott Parker 27 Your Mom's Box

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    white trash hotdogs. Hot dogs, wrapped in tortillas with cheese, fried in a pan. Dip in marinara. Rinse, repeat.
    [​IMG]
     
  18. My2Cents

    My2Cents Purple Belt

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    You sound fat
     
  19. Revolver

    Revolver you sound poor Staff Member Senior Moderator

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    Isn't prison style food similar to poor people food? If so, never tried.
     
  20. blaseblah

    blaseblah Gold Belt

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    The grocery store is only 3 blocks away.
     
  21. KONG-D'SNT-TAP

    KONG-D'SNT-TAP Titanium Belt

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    Why would someone not in prison eat like a prisoner?
     
  22. fonzob1

    fonzob1 Silver Belt

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    What else did you make that "young ass little white boy" do?
     

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