Dealing with contradicting, one upper, and needs to be right types of people.

massive insecurity, probly didnt get enough attention as a kid. maybe parents werent around or were unavailable.
 
Just buy lots of jewelry and flash it in this persons face
 
Estemachine said:
One time I met with his "best friend" to get some weed, it was the first time Edward wasn't present, and the guy told me straight up that him and his mother were talking about how he does that to everyone at the house, disagrees with everyone, but when he gets proven wrong, changes the version of his story to yours. To not look like he was wrong.
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I did that one time and it was a lot of fun. But it was intentional, i trollled this girl. We were looking at the sky and it was full of stars and I kept insisting they were ALL satalties then she was like no! And called her friends over to be like help us settle an argument and I immediately claimed she had been saying all the stars were satalties and was real stubborn about it and she got sooo mad and I laughed and laughed
 
Kowboy Karl said:
Just buy lots of jewelry and flash it in this persons face
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We decided to go for a workout the day of the wedding, and I was working out hard, no breaks, super setting, and he seemed annoyed by that. So I kept doing it.
 
Estemachine said:
When you talk about yourself, he seems extremely uninterested, which makes listening to him very difficult.
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Those are people who don't listen, they're just waiting for their next chance to talk.
 
Edward probably tells this story a lot better than you do.
 
Should have killed him...
 
Have known a few people like that but the two worst examples was an ex landscaping boss when I was 19. Me and the other guy finally noticed after a few weeks and then would start the mornings with the most outlandish stories and watch him squirm trying to one up is every time. The guy just couldn’t help it and words would just blurt out.

The other one was a friends BF and this guy would just tell tall tales of how he’s beaten up 5 people at once many times, KOs, etc. Finally the one time there actually was a chance for an altercation with some random stranger who was way skinnier than him, he completely bitched out and made some lame excuse. While getting “held back”.
 
Yotsuya said:
That was implied briefly, but the story does not tell, if it was even then one guy who would have prefered to chill and another who prefered to chit-chat. (I could have this dynamic dead wrong off course based on just two sentences.) It was also said, that Edward acted completely different in different social situations with more people around (=more space to withdraw from the conversation when needed).
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And my response to that is that these are people who crave attention. In large groups of people they can be superficially charming and draw people to them. With large groups, the conversation is often superficial. The number of people involved means that very few exchanges require any conversational depth. That means that a self-centered individual can be interesting at that level by flitting from topic to topic and from person to person. They aren't tasked with being deeply engaged with the person they're talking to at that moment.

It's when the group drops down to 2 or 3 people that the issues comes into play. In a small group, the conversation doesn't change topics as much and so an individual's superficial nature becomes more apparent. You can be superficial without making everything about yourself though. Someone can be tangential, they can miss the point, they can tune out for stretches of time. Okay, that's just being a bad conversationalist.

It's when the person relates everything back to themselves in some way that you know that it's more than just not being a good conversationalist. And that happens in 2 ways - either they've done everything you're talking about and instead of listening to your experience they talk about theirs (you went on a hot air balloon, they went on a bigger balloon in a better place). Or they change the subject from your experience to their experience in something that's only remotely related (you went on a hot air balloon so they start talking about the time they blew up balloons in science class). In either case, the point is that they constantly shift the conversation to their experiences with little interest in your experiences except as a bridge to more conversation about themselves.
 
Call him Cool Whip, cuz he tops everything. I worked with a one upper before, it does get old
 
mooseman17 said:
Have known a few people like that but the two worst examples was an ex landscaping boss when I was 19. Me and the other guy finally noticed after a few weeks and then would start the mornings with the most outlandish stories and watch him squirm trying to one up is every time. The guy just couldn’t help it and words would just blurt out.
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I'm convinced every workplace or circle of friends & acquaintances has at least one person like the above. If they're not too annoying we generally let them be, but past a certain point we start playing with them to see what kind of absurd stuff they'll come up with. Unfortunately I'm not quick witted enough in person to get the best & most hilarious results.
 
I think some of the people that do this are just really insecure, and do this in a weird attempt to relate to others

so not a 'hey look at me, give me attention' thing, but a 'oh I know how exactly how you felt b/c one time...'
 
aerius said:
I'm convinced every workplace or circle of friends & acquaintances has at least one person like the above. If they're not too annoying we generally let them be, but past a certain point we start playing with them to see what kind of absurd stuff they'll come up with. Unfortunately I'm not quick witted enough in person to get the best & most hilarious results.
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You just have to start off slow and see how far you can go.
 
Edward feels inadequate compared to you, that's the only reason someone would do this. I've got a mate like this, actually two, I don't see them much now. One guy I used to smoke weed with when i was a loser unemployed uni student, once i started coming good and getting a proper job he became like that.
 
OP, like others on here, I know exactly what you're talking about. I have a co-worker who is super intelligent, hard-working, and honestly a likable guy up until the point that he corrects you, counter-points you, or tells you you're wrong and why you're wrong. Drives me and anyone who goes on work travel with him absolutely nuts.

No matter what topic I may pick and how neutral my opinion may be I'm wrong. I hear "Well, you gotta understand that.....blah blah blah". Or "You're wrong, people do that because blah blah blah".

By the third day of a week of travel I'm ready to put him on ignore. It's crazy because we're both from PA, have similar backgrounds, like shooting guns, and shouldn't butt heads but we do when he gets into "I'm right" mode which usually starts on day 2 of travel.
 
panamaican said:
And my response to that is that these are people who crave attention. In large groups of people they can be superficially charming and draw people to them. With large groups, the conversation is often superficial. The number of people involved means that very few exchanges require any conversational depth. That means that a self-centered individual can be interesting at that level by flitting from topic to topic and from person to person. They aren't tasked with being deeply engaged with the person they're talking to at that moment.

It's when the group drops down to 2 or 3 people that the issues comes into play. In a small group, the conversation doesn't change topics as much and so an individual's superficial nature becomes more apparent. You can be superficial without making everything about yourself though. Someone can be tangential, they can miss the point, they can tune out for stretches of time. Okay, that's just being a bad conversationalist.

It's when the person relates everything back to themselves in some way that you know that it's more than just not being a good conversationalist. And that happens in 2 ways - either they've done everything you're talking about and instead of listening to your experience they talk about theirs (you went on a hot air balloon, they went on a bigger balloon in a better place). Or they change the subject from your experience to their experience in something that's only remotely related (you went on a hot air balloon so they start talking about the time they blew up balloons in science class). In either case, the point is that they constantly shift the conversation to their experiences with little interest in your experiences except as a bridge to more conversation about themselves.
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Looks like I'm in no-win situation trying to defend people who are known for insisting to win an argument by any no matter what and I would also be the only one with skin in the game having to relate on personal stuff. I do still think that there's a lot truth in what you say, but that your view is too narrow.
 
Yotsuya said:
Looks like I'm in no-win situation trying to defend people who are known for insisting to win an argument by any no matter what and I would also be the only one with skin in the game having to relate on personal stuff. I do still think that there's a lot truth in what you say, but that your view is too narrow.
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That's fine. I laid out 4 positions originally, including the possibility that the OP was the problem or that the individual was just tone deaf.

You only responded to 1 of the 4 positions, ignoring the other 3. The position about narcissistic personalities. The one that you felt related back to you most personally.

That's actually surprisingly on point isn't it? :eek: You only responded to the one position that you felt was about you, ignoring the rest of the post that you felt wasn't about you. The OP is about his experience, my post was about the range of possible explanations. Your response was about justifying your personal behavior....something completely irrelevant to the OP or my response.

<{danawhoah}>
 
sub_thug said:
Hi, I’m Edward. Thanks, TS. I was planning on making a thread about my friend who is a moron and wrong about everything, but thanks for saving me the time.
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Irony is TS usually tries and one ups people on the forum.
I think he found another him in Edward.
 
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