Confessions part 2: Let's Have an Adult Conversation About Adultery

[GoshiShun17]

Lol at worrying about random dudes judging you on the internet....


Fuck I'll share...
Yeah i cheated on my wife when we had been married only 5yrs.
Why? Now i dunno, young and dumb...any explanation is going to sound like an excuse so ill pass.

Yeah i instantly regretted it...she wasn't hearing it and we got divorced...for 5yrs. In 2010 we remarried and we've been together since then.

Yes it's possible to be faithful... it's called maturity.

Nah don't have any other experience with it (dont really count buddies cheating on their gf's... I'm a grown man and don't give a shit about others relationships).

What's the point of thread? Honest question ts.
Are you looking for ppl to tell you it's ok you cheated on your wife?

Thanks for sharing. The point of this thread was just to have an honest conversation about temptation. Something I deal with and just to see how people are affected by it. I have NOT cheated on my wife. I'm only 2 years in. I have a friend who is married to the sister of another friend. He has cheated with his brother in law turning a blind eye.

Most guys I could ask don't give a fuck OR they lie and act like they are perfect. Also I'm glad everything worked out for you. Sounds like true love.

 

[MrFriendly]

Thanks for sharing. The point of this thread was just to have an honest conversation about temptation. Something I deal with and just to see how people are affected by it. I have NOT cheated on my wife. I'm only 2 years in. I have a friend who is married to the sister of another friend. He has cheated with his brother in law turning a blind eye.

Most guys I could ask don't give a fuck OR they lie and act like they are perfect. Also I'm glad everything worked out for you. Sounds like true love.

Fair enough, yeah i dunno any dude personally who would get involved in another's relationship unless it involves a family member (sisters husband sleeps around on her and he's catching a beating)

 

[GoshiShun17]

No there isn't.

It takes strength to truly forgive someone.

 

[HwoarangStyle]

i cheated on the mother of my son about a month ago (with out neighbour she apparently never really liked). She found out immediately through a FB message. Amateur hour, Ive really never cheated on a spouse before, I still feel like absolute dogshit about the whole situation. I'm a piece of shit tbh

 

[TheHegemon1]

I'll share, was married for years when I was younger, met a woman on an online game. Became friends for several years, after a while things got more and more personal, she lived about 6 hours away. Both were unhappy(she was also married) so she drove all the way to meet me in person and we banged in a hotel for several hours, several times. I'd never cheated so this was the first women in many years I'd been with besides my wife at the time. She was hot as fuck and we had a great time. About 2 months later her husband figures out what happened, send the info to my wife, divorce ensues. I felt terrible at the time, took a long time to deal with it.
And so fast forward a few more years, met a new girl, hot as fuck too, in a relationship for a couple years but after a bit things were not right, I knew it most likely because I had done the same things. Went through her phone to see if I was right and boom, totally was, she was cheating on me. Luckily we weren't married or anything so broke it off, and she moved right in with the guy.

So there you go, karma/justice knows every man's number. Honestly though I was a POS back then so I did my ex a favor just like my ex did me a favor. Now I'm more aware of who I am and I'm good with being single, less headaches and I'm not cheating or getting cheated on.

 

[cooks1]

I've never cheated but my Dad has done it to my mum loads of times. We talked about it a lot when we were in Thailand together last month. He has a sidepiece from Vietnam right now, half his age, that treats him like a god. I understood completely why he'd do it because my mum treats him like shit. He's stuck with her for 40 years and given her everything she could want. She's never had to work a serious job and spends all her time in a villa in Thailand and still does nothing but bitch and moan about how hard her life is while he's still working his ass off running two businesses, one of them in Africa ffs. Happy for my dad.

Jesus. That is tough for your Dad. Sorry your Mom is a bitch to him. And I suppose it's good that he found someone that brings him happiness. But this highlights one of my fundamental beliefs of cheating. It is really about Fear. Fear of confrontation. Fear of facing that you might be hurting someone emotionally. Lots and lots of fear.

You Dad is not cheating on your Mom because she is a bitch to him. He is cheating on her because he does not want to confront the situation that she is being a bitch to him and making him miserable. Maybe that would mean getting a divorce, maybe it just means changing the boundaries of the relationship. But cheating and lying about it is a MUCH easier path to take than that. At it's root, cheating is a cowardly act.

Your Dad could have gone to your mom and confronted the situation. I understand some cultures feel some kind of way about divorce. So maybe he just confronts the situation by telling her that hes is going to do what he needs to make himself happy and she should do the same.

I never understood it. Numerous times in my life I have been in a committed relationship and began to develop an interest in another person I wanted to explore. When that happened, I went to the person I was in the relationship with. I shared my feelings and attempted to change the boundaries of the relationship to give me the freedom I needed. Sometimes I got that freedom. And sometimes I had to end the relationship. And I was on the other end of that equation a few times as well.

 

[vanillaisis]

If I get the desire to cheat on the person I'm with then that means I shouldn't be with that person. It's a red flag from your subconcious. It would be apparent I'm not truly interested in the person I'm dating. So yeah, if I cheat, then that means a break-up is coming very soon.

 

[Cpt Migraine]

I used to be really black and white on this but with age i've come to accept the fact.. everything is a grey zone..

I'm not a cheater.. unfortunately.. i've passed up some fucking amazing ass.. when it's over with whatever girl i regret not going for it but whatever.. it's just me right now calling me then a pussy in hindsight..

Anyways.. some cheat because they can.. some cheat because they won't get none.. in that case i blame their partner 100 percent..

if you're not satisfying your partner then you'll get cheated on.. especially for men it's like eating or taking a piss.. sure.. you can avoid it for a very long time but sooner or later you'll eat or die..

 

[GoshiShun17]

Fair enough, yeah i dunno any dude personally who would get involved in another's relationship unless it involves a family member (sisters husband sleeps around on her and he's catching a beating)

And you are right about the whole maturity thing. When I was a kid I thought I was mature and that this wouldn't be a such a challenge for me.

But as an adult I see that most of us as men have a hard time maturing in that area. For instance if I knew I could bang my hot coworker without my wife finding out and taking my kids, I can't say I would not do it. Especially after she showed me her new nipple piercings on her very big full plump tits. Jesus I've said too much. I only looked. Didn't touch I swear.

Dammit I am a piece of shit. But yes you are right again. Lol at me worried about being judged by strangers on the internet. How old are you btw?

 

[Brampton_Boy]

I have been the "other man" on multiple occasions, but I have/would never cheat on a woman I was dating. Generally speaking, if I am in a long term relationship with someone and I love them (has happened 3 times in my life), I have eyes for only them. The idea of cheating is actually distressing.

When it comes to being with a married woman, I am currently involved in a long distance relationship with my best friend (who has been with the same guy for the past 9 years and married for the past 4). The cycle is always the same - she visits and something happens between us. This turns into a 4-6 month torrid affair where all we can think about is each other and we spend hours a day talking, culminating in me either flying to her, or vice versa.

Then things cool down when being an adult gets in the way and that she has a kid to take care of, and I have a career that demands a lot of my time. Still plan to visit her in 2 months, but we no longer spend every waking moment talking to one another.

As an addendum, I do feel guilt, but not nearly as much as I would have expected given that I generally consider myself to be a decent guy. When I traveled a lot for work, I would routinely sleep with married woman, but the magnitude of my actions was never felt as I was out of the city within 48 hours.

In retrospect, I recognize that what I am doing isn't healthy or fair. I will get mine one day, but for now, I do what makes me happy and am deferring the consequences until later.

 

[GearSolidMetal]

Are you done? When did I say I can't help myself??? I said I control myself. I can't control the fact that I'm tempted.

If it makes you feel better to judge people that you don't know then go ahead. But this is something that most normal men go through so you are just going to be be an angry judgemental asshole. @GearSolidMetal I quoted you by mistake.

EVERY MARRIED MAN AND WOMAN GETS TEMPTED.

We get tempted by a younger and hotter pieces of ass than our wives.

Women get tempted by more attractive men of a higher social status than their husbands.

How'd you feel if your wife gets fucked by a man who is better than you? Makes more money... has more friends... owns his own business... etc.

That's the same fear women have of discovering their husbands have fucked a younger and hotter piece of ass.

Just keep that in mind.

 

[boingyman]

I will be honest that there are times that I wonder if I would cheat given the opportunity happened at the right place at the right time, but I don't think I could do it. I would probably feel guilt and the worse part is I would probably be disappointed with myself. At the same time I can see why it happens. I've seen it happen with friends and coworkers countless of times.

 

[GoshiShun17]

EVERY MARRIED MAN AND WOMAN GETS TEMPTED.

We get tempted by a younger and hotter pieces of ass than our wives.

Women get tempted by more attractive men of a higher social status than their husbands.

How'd you feel if your wife gets fucked by a man who is better than you? Makes more money... has more friends... owns his own business... etc.

That's the same fear women have of discovering their husbands have fucked a younger and hotter piece of ass.

Just keep that in mind.

You are absolutely right. That's actually a convo me and my wife sometimes have. She is aware that I have female friends but she always tries to remind me not to let them cross boundaries that I would not want a man crossing with her. Even if that means something as simple as calling me for video chats or other more serious things.

At the same time I try to make my wife aware that I am capable of feeling all the same emotions she does. I may not express or show my emotions as much. I'm a fairly typical man. But I still have them. So treat me good woman!!! Lol.

 

[Uptown Swinger]

I've never cheated but my Dad has done it to my mum loads of times. We talked about it a lot when we were in Thailand together last month. He has a sidepiece from Vietnam right now, half his age, that treats him like a god. I understood completely why he'd do it because my mum treats him like shit. He's stuck with her for 40 years and given her everything she could want. She's never had to work a serious job and spends all her time in a villa in Thailand and still does nothing but bitch and moan about how hard her life is while he's still working his ass off running two businesses, one of them in Africa ffs. Happy for my dad.

Thanks for sharing Zer.
I'll reserve judgement on your dad until I see pics of your mom and his sidepiece.

 

[MixMartialFarts]

I have been the "other man" on multiple occasions, but I have/would never cheat on a woman I was dating. Generally speaking, if I am in a long term relationship with someone and I love them (has happened 3 times in my life), I have eyes for only them. The idea of cheating is actually distressing.

When it comes to being with a married woman, I am currently involved in a long distance relationship with my best friend (who has been with the same guy for the past 9 years and married for the past 4). The cycle is always the same - she visits and something happens between us. This turns into a 4-6 month torrid affair where all we can think about is each other and we spend hours a day talking, culminating in me either flying to her, or vice versa.

Then things cool down when being an adult gets in the way and that she has a kid to take care of, and I have a career that demands a lot of my time. Still plan to visit her in 2 months, but we no longer spend every waking moment talking to one another.

As an addendum, I do feel guilt, but not nearly as much as I would have expected given that I generally consider myself to be a decent guy. When I traveled a lot for work, I would routinely sleep with married woman, but the magnitude of my actions was never felt as I was out of the city within 48 hours.

In retrospect, I recognize that what I am doing isn't healthy or fair. I will get mine one day, but for now, I do what makes me happy and am deferring the consequences until later.

I know the OP said this is supposed to be a judgement free zone but wow.....hard not to judge that.

 

[Bacco]

Everything can be going great with my woman and I still get the urge. I've cheated on my past girlfriend after having sex with her twice earlier that day.

In fact I'll go as far as to say I can/have loved more than one woman at once.

I may add it happen to me to love my woman MORE when i'm on a cheating streak than periods i try to stay faithful

It's about perception i guess, is in first case i see her as my favourite place, in the latter she's still the favourite place but have walls and you can't get out

Not saying a "prison", but the lack of freedom make progressively worse your stay

 

[GoshiShun17]

I may add it happen to me to love my woman MORE when i'm on a cheating streak than periods i try to stay faithful

It's about perception i guess, is in first case i see her as my favourite place, in the latter she's still the favourite place but have walls and you can't get out

Not saying a "prison", but the lack of freedom make progressively worse your stay

I relate to this too much.

 

[GoshiShun17]

i cheated on the mother of my son about a month ago (with out neighbour she apparently never really liked). She found out immediately through a FB message. Amateur hour, Ive really never cheated on a spouse before, I still feel like absolute dogshit about the whole situation. I'm a piece of shit tbh

I'll share, was married for years when I was younger, met a woman on an online game. Became friends for several years, after a while things got more and more personal, she lived about 6 hours away. Both were unhappy(she was also married) so she drove all the way to meet me in person and we banged in a hotel for several hours, several times. I'd never cheated so this was the first women in many years I'd been with besides my wife at the time. She was hot as fuck and we had a great time. About 2 months later her husband figures out what happened, send the info to my wife, divorce ensues. I felt terrible at the time, took a long time to deal with it.
And so fast forward a few more years, met a new girl, hot as fuck too, in a relationship for a couple years but after a bit things were not right, I knew it most likely because I had done the same things. Went through her phone to see if I was right and boom, totally was, she was cheating on me. Luckily we weren't married or anything so broke it off, and she moved right in with the guy.

So there you go, karma/justice knows every man's number. Honestly though I was a POS back then so I did my ex a favor just like my ex did me a favor. Now I'm more aware of who I am and I'm good with being single, less headaches and I'm not cheating or getting cheated on.

Thanks for sharing fellas. @HwoarangStyle I hope everything works out for you. My personal biggest fears are hurting my wife and having to live apart, even if it's just part time, from my young son. @TheHegemon1 damn bro it sounds like you went through some Soap opera, Novela shit.

 

[Blayt7hh]

Any man who would judge another man for being a man is probably a boy so I won't take them seriously.

Says the man who didn’t share any stories in the OP

 

[HwoarangStyle]

Thanks for sharing fellas. @HwoarangStyle I hope everything works out for you. My personal biggest fears are hurting my wife and having to live apart, even if it's just part time, from my young son. @TheHegemon1 damn bro it sounds like you went through some Soap opera, Novela shit.

i didnt even get to the worst part bro, i didnt want to say it but i figure i should. she was just admitted to the mental health ward at the hospital near us, last night. i have my son right now at my parents. she is diagnosed bi-polar, but she took herself to the crisis response center because she was feeling suicidal. she said its not because of us, but im sure it doesnt fucking help. shes having a manic episode. usually i notice when shes manic but ive barely seen her since this all happened. her family hates my fucking guts i got a message from her mom telling me to leave her alone but im going to go visit her tonight.