Can we just sign Ben Askren and tell people its CM Punk?

Discussion in 'UFC Discussion' started by EGarrett, Jan 2, 2015.

  1. EGarrett

    EGarrett Silver Belt

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    Guys I figured it out.

    Everybody from WWE is interested in seeing CM Punk competing in a new venue, unfortunately Punk is a "grappler" with a white belt in BJJ and his striking leaves much to be desired.

    So signing him to a big money deal and watching him get executed within 60 seconds helps no one. Meanwhile, Ben Askren utterly dominates in the boondock leagues and can't get signed cuz no one knows who he is...and no one knows who he is because he can't get signed, trapping him in an interdimensional paradox that Matthew McConaughey would fear.

    So here's what we do. Punk gets signed, then the week of the first fight he unfortunately "breaks his nose" but says he will power through this, but is "required to compete" with one of those protective masks. (the NSAC obviously will be cut in on dose million$)

    Fighting under this mask will actually be Ben Askren. People are shocked at the level of skill Punk displays in his debut, and he simply modestly laughs it off and chalks it up to Duke Roufus "showing him a few things."

    From this point on, Punk will continue to do 100% of the press and interviews, using his mic skills, notoriety and charisma, while Askren will be paid to "play the part" of CM Punk in the ring. Given that wrestling fans couldn't care less about their shows being booked as long as they get a good show, they will heartily approve, while MMA fans will be happy to see Askren able to compete.

    ...and this is the best thread I can start 2 AM.
     
  2. estranged

    estranged Brown Belt

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    yeah thewy should sign askren
     
  3. SuperNerd

    SuperNerd Playoff Mode.

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    Askren wins, and drops the belt to Punk via finger poke of doom.
     
  4. MortalWombat

    MortalWombat Vombatus Sherdoggus

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    Brilliant, make it happen.
     
  5. xGRIMREAPERx

    xGRIMREAPERx Green Belt

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    A ringer. I wanna see Punk get smashed
     
  6. couturefan904

    couturefan904 White Belt

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    Hope Askren isn't afraid of a tattoo needle..
     
  7. deviake

    deviake NightwingBJJ Belt

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    I would love to see Askren in the UFC.
     
  8. Cooliox

    Cooliox Gold Belt Platinum Member

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    Askren isn't very likable.
     
  9. PorkPiePusher

    PorkPiePusher Loro Piana cashmere belt

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  10. daydaystyles

    daydaystyles Green Belt

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    This
     
  11. Khabib Fan

    Khabib Fan Physics is Religion

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    Yeah, Askren is looking better and better.
     
  12. WrestlinganJudo

    WrestlinganJudo Banned Banned

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    Actually in real life he is likable.
     
  13. RepairManManMan

    RepairManManMan Banned Banned

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    Askren is the reason for pettis' success
     
  14. GrantB13

    GrantB13 Brown Belt

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    "From that point on" ...

    How long is Punk's nose supposed to stay broken?
     
  15. Janne1

    Janne1 Green Belt

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    The afro will expose it's Askren. No mask can hold that beast of a hair.
     
  16. Cooliox

    Cooliox Gold Belt Platinum Member

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    then he's deliberately behaving like an idiot with professional matters?

    hmmm
     
  17. WrestlinganJudo

    WrestlinganJudo Banned Banned

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    His feud with Dana started by Askren mentioning drug testing. Dana came back with personal attacks so Askren responded. Also Askren has observed trash talking has gotting other people places.
     
  18. born2killl

    born2killl Brown Belt

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    can we just shut up about ben askren. he doesnt matter
     
  19. Janne1

    Janne1 Green Belt

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    He should matter. He would easily be top 5 WW in the UFC but since Dana personally doesn't like him he won't allow him in. Dana's making the UFC look shittier with his personal problems, which should never be the case. It disgusts me.
     
  20. GamePunisher85

    GamePunisher85 PRIDE FC 4 LIFE

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    [​IMG]
     

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