1. The official Sherdog Store is back! Check it out! » Discuss it here! »

Can we just sign Ben Askren and tell people its CM Punk?

Discussion in 'UFC Discussion' started by EGarrett, Jan 2, 2015.

  1. EGarrett Silver Belt

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2006
    Messages:
    10,801
    Likes Received:
    0
    Guys I figured it out.

    Everybody from WWE is interested in seeing CM Punk competing in a new venue, unfortunately Punk is a "grappler" with a white belt in BJJ and his striking leaves much to be desired.

    So signing him to a big money deal and watching him get executed within 60 seconds helps no one. Meanwhile, Ben Askren utterly dominates in the boondock leagues and can't get signed cuz no one knows who he is...and no one knows who he is because he can't get signed, trapping him in an interdimensional paradox that Matthew McConaughey would fear.

    So here's what we do. Punk gets signed, then the week of the first fight he unfortunately "breaks his nose" but says he will power through this, but is "required to compete" with one of those protective masks. (the NSAC obviously will be cut in on dose million$)

    Fighting under this mask will actually be Ben Askren. People are shocked at the level of skill Punk displays in his debut, and he simply modestly laughs it off and chalks it up to Duke Roufus "showing him a few things."

    From this point on, Punk will continue to do 100% of the press and interviews, using his mic skills, notoriety and charisma, while Askren will be paid to "play the part" of CM Punk in the ring. Given that wrestling fans couldn't care less about their shows being booked as long as they get a good show, they will heartily approve, while MMA fans will be happy to see Askren able to compete.

    ...and this is the best thread I can start 2 AM.
     
  2. estranged Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2014
    Messages:
    9,707
    Likes Received:
    8,137
    yeah thewy should sign askren
     
  3. SuperNerd Off-Season Mode.

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2005
    Messages:
    56,986
    Likes Received:
    2,352
    Askren wins, and drops the belt to Punk via finger poke of doom.
     
  4. MortalWombat Vombatus Sherdoggus

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2005
    Messages:
    7,248
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Australia
    Brilliant, make it happen.
     
  5. xGRIMREAPERx Green Belt

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2010
    Messages:
    1,081
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    TEXAS
    A ringer. I wanna see Punk get smashed
     
  6. couturefan904 White Belt

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2012
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hope Askren isn't afraid of a tattoo needle..
     
  7. deviake NightwingBJJ

    Joined:
    Jan 2, 2015
    Messages:
    10,453
    Likes Received:
    1,460
    Location:
    Gold Saucer
    I would love to see Askren in the UFC.
     
  8. Cooliox Steel Belt Platinum Member

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2013
    Messages:
    26,674
    Likes Received:
    2,281
    Location:
    Thailand
    Askren isn't very likable.
     
  9. PorkPiePusher Loro Piana cashmere belt

    Joined:
    Sep 8, 2011
    Messages:
    3,415
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Tlön, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius
  10. daydaystyles Green Belt

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2010
    Messages:
    1,277
    Likes Received:
    0
    This
     
  11. Khabib Fan Kim Yo Jong - Unify Korea Banned

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2014
    Messages:
    11,525
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    SoCal
    Yeah, Askren is looking better and better.
     
  12. WrestlinganJudo Banned Banned

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2014
    Messages:
    7,876
    Likes Received:
    0
    Actually in real life he is likable.
     
  13. RepairManManMan Banned Banned

    Joined:
    May 21, 2013
    Messages:
    4,279
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    behind every sin
    Askren is the reason for pettis' success
     
  14. GrantB13 Red Belt

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2012
    Messages:
    7,828
    Likes Received:
    2,098
    "From that point on" ...

    How long is Punk's nose supposed to stay broken?
     
  15. Janne1 Green Belt

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2014
    Messages:
    1,291
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    Finland
    The afro will expose it's Askren. No mask can hold that beast of a hair.
     
  16. Cooliox Steel Belt Platinum Member

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2013
    Messages:
    26,674
    Likes Received:
    2,281
    Location:
    Thailand
    then he's deliberately behaving like an idiot with professional matters?

    hmmm
     
  17. WrestlinganJudo Banned Banned

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2014
    Messages:
    7,876
    Likes Received:
    0
    His feud with Dana started by Askren mentioning drug testing. Dana came back with personal attacks so Askren responded. Also Askren has observed trash talking has gotting other people places.
     
  18. born2killl Brown Belt

    Joined:
    Sep 24, 2011
    Messages:
    3,188
    Likes Received:
    0
    can we just shut up about ben askren. he doesnt matter
     
  19. Janne1 Green Belt

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2014
    Messages:
    1,291
    Likes Received:
    17
    Location:
    Finland
    He should matter. He would easily be top 5 WW in the UFC but since Dana personally doesn't like him he won't allow him in. Dana's making the UFC look shittier with his personal problems, which should never be the case. It disgusts me.
     
  20. GamePunisher85 PRIDE FC 4 LIFE

    Joined:
    Apr 25, 2010
    Messages:
    963
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Sweden/Chechnya
    [​IMG]
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.