BS fighting stories from friends....

You can't just start this thread and not offer something to get it going.

If you don't have a good story, make something up.
 
My friend is a two time Kumite champion who has to register his fists as lethal weapons.
 
This womanlet princess who've never gotten roughed up before said a 6'3 dude hare-assed her on the subway platform and she broke his nose, then he left like a wuss

Lol
 
I cant recall a friend lying about any fights BUT one of my old friends was a really good wrestler and would always act like that would be enough to get him in the UFC. He literally thought with nothing more than a somewhat-OK highschool wrestling background he could be UFC champ.

I said lets roll then. I was a lot smaller and not nearly as good of a wrestler but had much more BJJ experience. We rolled for all of 45 seconds before I had him in a fully locked triangle. I wouldnt let go until he tapped so I just kept squeezing harder and harder to he eventually tapped right as he was going out.

To this day he will say right to my face this never happened. I dont know if him going out erased his memory of if he really is just that insecure
 
pcptornado said:
My friend is a two time Kumite champion who has to register his fists as lethal weapons.
Click to expand...

Came to post the ol' "my hands are registered weapons" I know a guy that's so nice and such a good dude, but he said "the 'police know me...that's why my hands are on paper."

I was like

upload_2018-3-25_16-22-29.jpeg
 
IloveTHIS said:
I cant recall a friend lying about any fights BUT one of my old friends was a really good wrestler and would always act like that would be enough to get him in the UFC. He literally thought with nothing more than a somewhat-OK highschool wrestling background he could be UFC champ.

I said lets roll then. I was a lot smaller and not nearly as good of a wrestler but had much more BJJ experience. We rolled for all of 45 seconds before I had him in a fully locked triangle. I wouldnt let go until he tapped so I just kept squeezing harder and harder to he eventually tapped right as he was going out.

To this day he will say right to my face this never happened. I dont know if him going out erased his memory of if he really is just that insecure
Click to expand...
Challenge him again really calmly when he brings it up.
 
5'4" Filipino guy I work with currently has a broken hand. He says some dudes tried to run him off the road on his motorcycle so they all pulled over and he beat three of their asses
<{cruzshake}>
 
mb23100 said:
5'4" Filipino guy I work with currently has a broken hand. He says some dudes tried to run him off the road on his motorcycle so they all pulled over and he beat three of their asses
<{cruzshake}>
Click to expand...

th
 
Wouldn't real fighting stories be better?

<{vega}>
 
mb23100 said:
5'4" Filipino guy I work with currently has a broken hand. He says some dudes tried to run him off the road on his motorcycle so they all pulled over and he beat three of their asses
<{cruzshake}>
Click to expand...

Sounds like this bitch-made dude I knew who came back to practice one day with a broken finger and claimed it was because a girl orgasmed so hard while he finger-blasted her. Sure, chief.
 
SFMMA said:
Sounds like this bitch-made dude I knew who came back to practice one day with a broken finger and claimed it was because a girl orgasmed so hard while he finger-blasted her. Sure, chief.
Click to expand...
Lol gotta give him props on the creativity though
 
I had a buddy who used to tell people he was short listed for the first UFC. Lost all respect when I read an article about him in the paper that was a clear cut case of stolen valour.
 
Had an older asian gf who claimed that her uncle knew a secret martial art that was too deadly to ever be used in the ufc and that it was passed down through secret societies. She wouln't admit that a ufc champion could beat up her uncle.
 
Buddy of mine once told us he hacked some dude's arm off with a hatchet during a fight. We all just kinda nodded and never were quite sure if he was a liar or was just a crazy Hmong teen.
 
This dude said someone was talking shit to him outside the rite aid and so he grabbed do him by the ears Moo eye Tay style and kneed him in the face, over and over and over, for like 5 minutes. AT LEAST. And so let go of the guys ears and he fell. Knocked out COLD. BROKEN nose.

So he just walked away before anybody saw him. But like 20 minutes later he walks back, right, because he wants to know if the dude is still lying there bleeding everywhere. He was! And then an ambulance showed up and so he walked away.

But he had to know if that guy survived because that's murder charges, so he walked back. DEAD. The coroner showed up and they put him into a BLACK body bag.

Now he's on the run, hiding out. Also, trying to sell weed to us at our apartment.

We were literally a house of nothing but fighting experience. All we could do was bust up laughing and say shit like, That's crazy man. When you grabbed him by the ears did he die then or later?
 
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