BJJ and girlfriends

[AcesUp22]

I am in need of some life advice! I work 50+ hours a week and train 4 to 5 days a week.

Tips on balancing work and BJJ with relationships?

 

[Cody Lancaster]

I just let my GF know that it's something that I love to do. She understands, would prolly even support me if I trained full time. :icon_chee

I guess i'm just lucky.

 

[Militas]

hell yea. if she can't support you then she prolly isn't the one for ya. As long as you are spending time with her weekly she should be allright.

 

[Rod1]

internet porn

 

[redaxe]

internet porn

I don't doubt it.

 

[Dake]

Meh. I've become married to the mats, and weights are my sidepiece.

 

[Viva Brazil]

Don't compartmentalize the different areas of your life. If you have limited time, then try to combine different things together. If you need to go shopping for groceries, go with your girlfriend. Teach her the moves you learn in training. If you're hanging out with your friends, bring her along.

That's the best advice I can give....

 

[Shogun Rising]

My own advice-

Yeah, if you're blowing off steam, take a female along. If you're watching TV to wind down, find something she likes too and watch that. A really surprising thing to use are HBO series. My favorite shows are Rome, Deadwood, Game of Thrones, and True Blood... and Sons of Anarchy, but that's not on HBO. My girlfriend loves all of those shows on HBO, even Game of Thrones, though she didn't think she'd like it. If you tell them what's going on, then they take it to really good in my experience. So if I get home and am tired from school, I pop in Rome or True Blood, and she likes to watch it with me, even if I go to sleep halfway through.

In terms of training, just remind her that it's good for your body, and it makes you happy. Even girls that aren't super health conscious want to be health conscious someday, so most of them understand training from a fitness perspective.

Girls don't shy away from busy men. They actually are drawn to it, because it shows them that we at least have something going on.

 

[andrewdabeast]

internet porn

+1.

 

[Jagcorps_esq]

You have to remember that for most of us, BJJ is a hobby. Sure, it touches on more parts of our lives than your average hobby, but still...it's a thing you do to enhance your life and not detract from it.

If you're ignoring responsibilities to family, friends, significant others, school, work, etc., then you've got to work out your priorities. For some people, BJJ really should be their lives and, if that's the case, they have to be with someone that accepts that as part of them....not just that thing they do everyone now and then.

As far as my wife is concerned, BJJ simply replaced golf/beer drinking time...so no real change there for her. The upside is, I'm in MUCH better shape, so she gets to enjoy that. I also share BJJ with my kids, something golf could do, and that makes her happy.

 

[notafighter86]

I am in need of some life advice! I work 50+ hours a week and train 4 to 5 days a week.

Tips on balancing work and BJJ with relationships?

Its quite simple and you probably know it. If you don't have enough time between work, training and your relationship then you have to cut back on one or two of them. Life is only complicated when you make it so.

 

[Rod1]

On a more serious response, most casual/young relationships dont survive the stress of training.

My solution? dragged my gf to BJJ as opposite of her joining spinning class, she stuck with it so it kind of counts like together time, of course we are in a 4 year old relationship and we share a lot of other things too, so its not like we have such troubles.

The reason you post this is because you feel you are not really complete in one part

So its either

You want to train more or your GF wants you to train less. As people said, you dont need to be a world champion to enjoy this, we are older people with responsibilities.

 

[fatalis]

Why not have her come along to a few sessions, it may be something you can bond on.

 

[otusa]

Encourage your girlfriend to spend time on her hobbies.

 

[cjlewis01]

Me and my fiancee probably argue about this at least 2 times a week. We have three kids under 3, and I work full time and go to school full time.

I try to explain to her that I graduate next spring, and will be looking for a coaching job along with my teaching job(HS Math major). I wrestled in HS, but was average(District Qualifier in D3 Ohio) and need something to make me more marketable, and show I haven't lost too much in terms of mat time. Hence the BJJ. I also an interested in the MMA aspect if I progress enough.

Its rough, but she tries to make it work, and I try to toe the line to see how pissed she is gonna get. These next couple of months should be interesting since I just switched to a much more legit gym, but is much further away.

 

[pretzelguard]

My gf hated me training so much so I took that bitch down and gogo'd her. That will teach her to mess with my jitz again

 

[Thrawn33]

If a woman can't bear the thought of other things besides her making you happy, bail. My g/f loved it when I was doing Judo 8x a week, so I married her.

 

[Balto]

If you only date mat bunnies, it will never be an issue.

 

[206warrior]

On a more serious response, most casual/young relationships dont survive the stress of training.

My solution? dragged my gf to BJJ as opposite of her joining spinning class, she stuck with it so it kind of counts like together time, of course we are in a 4 year old relationship and we share a lot of other things too, so its not like we have such troubles.

The reason you post this is because you feel you are not really complete in one part

So its either

You want to train more or your GF wants you to train less. As people said, you dont need to be a world champion to enjoy this, we are older people with responsibilities.

In my opinion that is a terrible idea. I'm not the kind of person who could share all their common interests and everything I do with the person I'm dating. What if you two are fighting? Are you really glad you brought all of that on to the mat?

 

[NateTx4112]

My now wife and I had the same issues and still sometimes do but rarely. We sat down, talked and came to a compromise where days X/Y/Z were here evenings and we would go to dinner/movies/errands etc. Days 1/2/3/4 were my Jiu Jitsu days (and weekend mornings) unless something came up and we could swap some days etc. If there is a birthday dinner/family event or something of that nature it's understood I will go to that and rotate to "her evening" so I don't miss out on a day of training.

Make it a priority that every Tuesday/Friday you take her out to dinner or do something the 2 of you at minimum. They need to feel important like they are more important than your training so make the small sacrifice to have a bit of balance in your life and let your body recover some as well. Unless you are training full time to be a world champion, its best to have some balance in your life and not ignore your other responsibilities (wife/school/career/kids/FAMILY).