At a crossroads

7

71Fish

Orange Belt
@Orange
Joined
Apr 3, 2015
Messages
427
Reaction score
0
I'm at a crossroads in my training. I need new challenges and new bodies. As I was coming up, it seemed like I wanted to be the most advanced guy at my school. Now that I am pretty much there, it sucks. We are a school full of white and blue belts, a purple and an occasional brown. I'm not challenged at all by any of the white/blues, the purple isn't much for me. The brown belt is moving so I don't count him anymore.

I want to go back to getting my ass kicked. My current school is very close, the next school where I know I will get my ass kicked is 20 miles away. Since my current school is the only one where I've trained (4 yrs), I feel bad about leaving.

I will be out of state next month and will have the opportunity to train at some bigger/better schools. This should only amplify the fact that I need new BJJ challenges.

Another factor to consider is that I'm in my mid 40s. I'm not going to get any more "athletic", though my BJJ can and will and has improve.

I know some of you have talked about changing schools. Did you talk to you future former instructor or did you just stop going? We are friendly but in the end, it is a business relationship.
 
You should definitely talk to him about it, but if you're planning on leaving you better be firm in your mind on that before having that conversation, because he will try to convince you to stay. And while you are correct that it's a business relationship, that doesn't mean it isn't personal and that he won't be hurt by you leaving. I have people I've done business with for many years, I know their kids' names, etc. and I'd definitely give them a good reason if I stopped working with them, business doesn't mean mercenary. But in the end if your primary goal is to get as good as you can and your current school isn't giving you that, then leaving is totally reasonable. Presumably you haven't been training for free or living with your coach or doing anything else that would necessitate significantly more loyalty than just having trained with him a long time, so you shouldn't feel bad about pursuing your goals elsewhere. Just be straight with him about it.
 
I don't know where you live, but if you only have one purple and occasionally a brown, it's probably time to move on. What belt are you?

If you visit San Diego let me know!
 
While you are still training at that place, I would recommend handicapping yourself during rolls and letting your training partners start in mount/side control and/or locked in arm bar positions. You can still get good practice vs people that are worse than you by doing that and coaching them on how to escape your submissions and how to submit you properly. The better you make them, the better they will make you.
 
There's this common misconception that you will always need to train with a group of people much better than you and I think it peaks around purple belt. While I think having a solid challenge is absolutely useful, the need for it all the time is highly overrated.

The most famous example, of course, is that Roger Gracie prepped for the Mundials (where he submitted every opponent in his weight and the absolute with mounted lapel chokes) by training mainly with white and blue belts at his new academy. Now I'd wager that he had some higher-tier training now and again and as an advanced grappler and instructor, he knew how to train smart, to pit his weaknesses against his training partners' (modest) strengths. But the case is a worthwhile one to notice.

Talking to most experienced fighters and competitors, the message that keeps coming back is that high-intensity training should be only 10-15% of your training, with a significant uptick only prior to competition (a camp, if you will). Another 20-30% should be against your peers, but at a slower pace over long matches (think 20 minutes+). The remainder is best spent working against lower belts. They're the ones you experiment on and refine against. Think of it as live drilling.

So that being said -- would it be possible to work out an arrangement to go to the further school once a week? I'm sure your instructor would understand the need for more challenge, yet would appreciate your working to maintain your relationship. And then you have the chance to keep training close to home.
 
Ton said:
While you are still training at that place, I would recommend handicapping yourself during rolls and letting your training partners start in mount/side control and/or locked in arm bar positions. You can still get good practice vs people that are worse than you by doing that and coaching them on how to escape your submissions and how to submit you properly. The better you make them, the better they will make you.
Click to expand...

I've been doing that for a long time. I don't always make it obvious, I do it in such a way so they "put" me there, then work out from there.

one.armed.jack said:
There's this common misconception that you will always need to train with a group of people much better than you and I think it peaks around purple belt. While I think having a solid challenge is absolutely useful, the need for it all the time is highly overrated.

The most famous example, of course, is that Roger Gracie prepped for the Mundials (where he submitted every opponent in his weight and the absolute with mounted lapel chokes) by training mainly with white and blue belts at his new academy. Now I'd wager that he had some higher-tier training now and again and as an advanced grappler and instructor, he knew how to train smart, to pit his weaknesses against his training partners' (modest) strengths. But the case is a worthwhile one to notice.

Talking to most experienced fighters and competitors, the message that keeps coming back is that high-intensity training should be only 10-15% of your training, with a significant uptick only prior to competition (a camp, if you will). Another 20-30% should be against your peers, but at a slower pace over long matches (think 20 minutes+). The remainder is best spent working against lower belts. They're the ones you experiment on and refine against. Think of it as live drilling.

So that being said -- would it be possible to work out an arrangement to go to the further school once a week? I'm sure your instructor would understand the need for more challenge, yet would appreciate your working to maintain your relationship. And then you have the chance to keep training close to home.
Click to expand...

I think the school I was planning to go to has a punch card. That is an option if I decide not to change permanently. I'll decide for sure during the month I am out of state.
I do regularly train at a different school most Saturdays. It's secret Jiu Jitsu Ninja stuff, but it's only once per week.
 
At the end of the day martial arts is a journey. The final destination never clear and ever evolving
I'm going through a time where I believe it is necessary for different reasons. I proposed a question to myself that I heard someone else ask.
What are you trying to get out of jiu jitsu right now, a year from now and 5 years from now. I am a month into that question and I really don't know.
If you know at 40 you want to be pushed by better people that is great. Make it happen. Your instructor should understand that you need to follow the journey. Be honest. You might be surprised as to what his reaction is depending on where he is on his journey.

Enjoy the trip. Keep us posted.
 
Just tell why you are leaving.
Teaching someone for 4 years is a long time
 
A mid 40's guy smashing through his school. I'd like to meet him.
 
If somebody wants to leave a gym I can understand. People do what that have to do for themselves and that's 100% cool.
What pisses me off is when you roll/ train/ watch fights/ go to tournaments with guys for years and, and then they leave without a word. You don't have to phone everybody individually and tell them your leaving, but being respectful and sending a group message isn't the hardest thing in the world.
If you up and leave on the spot without a word, don't expect your ex-teammates to go out of their way to be civil.
 
NAKMUAY18 said:
If somebody wants to leave a gym I can understand. People do what that have to do for themselves and that's 100% cool.
What pisses me off is when you roll/ train/ watch fights/ go to tournaments with guys for years and, and then they leave without a word. You don't have to phone everybody individually and tell them your leaving, but being respectful and sending a group message isn't the hardest thing in the world.
If you up and leave on the spot without a word, don't expect your ex-teammates to go out of their way to be civil.
Click to expand...

some ppl are socially awkward or have anxiety about that kind of stuff. smarter not to judge and trying to be civil. you might even realize the guy is cool as fuck and just didnt have the tools to confront ppl in that manner.
 
one.armed.jack said:
There's this common misconception that you will always need to train with a group of people much better than you and I think it peaks around purple belt.
Click to expand...

Have you actually met people that win at black black yet believe training with lower belts is better?
 
yetanother said:
Have you actually met people that win at black black yet believe training with lower belts is better?
Click to expand...

Dahaher thinks so. I think Bravo does as well. Dahaher says to develop offense and get good at new techniques train with lower belts. He said that should be 80% of your rolls. But come competition time you should train with higher level guys.
 
yetanother said:
Have you actually met people that win at black black yet believe training with lower belts is better?
Click to expand...

Roger springs instantly to mind. Just about every other top judoka, grappler, or MMA fighter at our academy, in fact. And Danaher, of course.

Don't mistake me -- the top guys DO train with others their level. But even that training is predominantly not at full intensity. The intensity is ramped up for camps and other competition or fight preparation. This concept of going full intensity all the time that seems so common amongst the greater hobbyist BJJ community is simply not viable and largely eschewed at higher levels.

I'm reminded of one of the points that Georges has made to me on a few occasions -- when he fights, he targets his opponent's weaknesses, but when he trains, he works against his partner's strengths.
 
yetanother said:
Have you actually met people that win at black black yet believe training with lower belts is better?
Click to expand...

Rob Kahn thinks so. In The Grappling Central Podcast.


Along the lines of if you practiced against 5 pros a week for a year, how would your offensive game develop? You would probably never get a chance to submit. Your defense would be great, but you would not have the necessary reps to develop an offence.
 
Byrd said:
Rob Kahn thinks so. In The Grappling Central Podcast.


Along the lines of if you practiced against 5 pros a week for a year, how would your offensive game develop? You would probably never get a chance to submit. Your defense would be great, but you would not have the necessary reps to develop an offence.
Click to expand...


Who is Rob Khan?

I'm not advocating training only with guys who are beyond you.
If the just use you for lapel chokes practice (I use white belts for that where there is nobody else to roll with) you won't learn much.

Working consistently with good guys will help your offence too.
Just do positional training so that you don't waste time being in side control bottom.
Once you get hard enough to sweep you will start working on your passing.
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.

Latest posts

Forum statistics

Threads
1,254,476
Messages
56,649,404
Members
175,333
Latest member
dubhlinn

Share this page

Back
Top