- Joined
- Apr 30, 2015
- Messages
- 12,635
- Reaction score
- 10,952
-For my entire life, I have always had trouble applying myself in anything. Whether it is school, sport, hobby or personal relationship, I never gave much effort. Granted there were a lot of things beyond my control that causes this (i.e. unsupportive/dysfunctional family), but a lot of times it is laziness, rationalization and insecurity.
-My situation now is that I have a job which a lot of people would kill for but I am often bored and mentally removed from being engaged it. I just kind of do my job, and despite being new to it, I am already looking for something more engaging and rewarding.
-I always had reasons why I never like where I was at that certain moment of my life. And because of this I am often alone. I always had fewer friends than average and my friends and current workmates don't feel reciprocated with their efforts in being my friend. What's worse is that my college click hardly ever go out together anymore.
Cliffs:
-Emo bro wants to be less emo and more alpha.
-I am probably retarded but I still want to be socially functional
-My situation now is that I have a job which a lot of people would kill for but I am often bored and mentally removed from being engaged it. I just kind of do my job, and despite being new to it, I am already looking for something more engaging and rewarding.
-I always had reasons why I never like where I was at that certain moment of my life. And because of this I am often alone. I always had fewer friends than average and my friends and current workmates don't feel reciprocated with their efforts in being my friend. What's worse is that my college click hardly ever go out together anymore.
-I have always been the wallflower/silent type and that shit might have been acceptable when you are younger but not when you are almost 30 years old.
-There is this great mental tendency for me to "shut off" whenever the average person would be engaged whether it is a simple conversation or work related group activity. Or just be very inactive generally.
-I have never been in a serious relationship and it is hard for me to make friends much less approach a cute chick. I think most ladies would find me weird and timid and lacking non-physical attractive qualities.
-Many people would reach out to befriend me but almost all the time, because of habit, I just be polite and decline their invitation. I swear I wouldn't be surprised If I was ever diagnosed with Asperger's or some shit. There's always a reason I give myself why I can't talk to him or her on a regular basis.
-"Happiness is a journey not a destination" is a saying that I understand but don't feel. I fear that I would never reach that goal of premium job, loved one all around you and all of that good stuff.
-For the longest time, I was oblivious to this, and maybe in denial as a I grew older. But at this point, I feel I have a great need to change myself for the better and I don't know where to start.
-People with equal or even less than what I have, have achieved way more because of having a better attitude.
-I have struggled with borderline depression before and now I think it's more of a "almost in your 30's existential crisis".
-Sherdog is way easier place for me to express myself and I feel I have a vicarious mental outlook of this and I need to work on my IRL skills.
-There is this great mental tendency for me to "shut off" whenever the average person would be engaged whether it is a simple conversation or work related group activity. Or just be very inactive generally.
-I have never been in a serious relationship and it is hard for me to make friends much less approach a cute chick. I think most ladies would find me weird and timid and lacking non-physical attractive qualities.
-Many people would reach out to befriend me but almost all the time, because of habit, I just be polite and decline their invitation. I swear I wouldn't be surprised If I was ever diagnosed with Asperger's or some shit. There's always a reason I give myself why I can't talk to him or her on a regular basis.
-"Happiness is a journey not a destination" is a saying that I understand but don't feel. I fear that I would never reach that goal of premium job, loved one all around you and all of that good stuff.
-For the longest time, I was oblivious to this, and maybe in denial as a I grew older. But at this point, I feel I have a great need to change myself for the better and I don't know where to start.
-People with equal or even less than what I have, have achieved way more because of having a better attitude.
-I have struggled with borderline depression before and now I think it's more of a "almost in your 30's existential crisis".
-Sherdog is way easier place for me to express myself and I feel I have a vicarious mental outlook of this and I need to work on my IRL skills.
Cliffs:
-Emo bro wants to be less emo and more alpha.
-I am probably retarded but I still want to be socially functional
