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All I Want for Christmas is CM Punk

Discussion in 'UFC Discussion' started by BeerCityBandit, Dec 22, 2016.

  1. BeerCityBandit Founding member of the Beer City Fight Club

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    So I've been doing this stand up comedy thing for about a year now, and I decided to incorporate my love of MMA for the first time. I think it went over pretty well with the live crowd, but really you guys are my target audience. I know it's a little long, but I highlight some things I've experienced in training along with making fun of CM Punk. I sincerely hope you guys dig it.
     
  2. SuperNerd Season Mode.

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    popcorn.gif
     
  3. James Baller Black Belt Banned

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  4. TheGrouch Shoulda died already

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    *didn't watch*
     
  5. HeDucking Im so Groovy Banned

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    I have watched for 5 minutes and I havent smiled or chuckled once. Your delivery is monotonous and that could be used to hilarious effect but here it isnt. It especially shows its flaws when you simulated the dialogue between two guys.

    Dont worry though as long as you're likeable you may make a career out of it. Joe Rogan is a sh*tty comedian but he still sells out.
     
  6. Guernica Double Yellow Belt Banned

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    2/10

    #GUERNICAbless
     
  7. HI SCOTT NEWMAN ✔ Cats are the only hope for planet survival ✔

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
     
  8. PutUpYourDux - Banned

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2016
    Messages:
    2,162
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    Location:
    Hong Kong
    Too much story, not enough punchlines.

    A pro comedian will drop a punchline like every 10 seconds.

    People have short attention spans so if you're not making them laugh frequently they're going to zone out.
     
  9. Ether13 Purple Belt

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2016
    Messages:
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    Way funnier than Rogan's standup.
     
  10. ClosetVitorFan Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2015
    Messages:
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    Likes Received:
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    Good stories but not funny. This sounds like a lot of gym/mma stories I have. Similar. They're not really funny. Talk about other stuff. Take a trip to Tijuana Mexico. Instant hilarity.
     
  11. HaikenEdge Rationality will win the day.

    Joined:
    Sep 18, 2010
    Messages:
    2,525
    Likes Received:
    11
  12. James Baller Black Belt Banned

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2014
    Messages:
    5,961
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    A few observations:

    - TS has a mustache. That's always a plus in my book.
    - That heckler was brutal. "Wrestling is almost as fake as your audience laughing." But fuck him. Hecklers are whores.
    - When TS describes sparring, there are way more funny ways to go about it than "I learned I could take a punch, but I learned I don't like punching people" (paraphrasing). Like maybe, "I learned I could take a punch. My head was like a speedbag." (I'm no comic, I'm just saying).
    - TS mentions "Booberry" cereal. Another plus.
     
    Last edited: Dec 22, 2016
  13. Why So Serious Purple Belt

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2012
    Messages:
    1,720
    Likes Received:
    13
  14. BeerCityBandit Founding member of the Beer City Fight Club

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2016
    Messages:
    570
    Likes Received:
    62
    Location:
    Grand Rapids, MI
    Why? This is the approximate reception I'd anticipated. I knew where I was posting this. Did it anyway. Fuck it. At least someone's watching.
     
  15. mikeyModo White Belt

    Joined:
    May 30, 2016
    Messages:
    16
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    Location:
    CA, USA
    guts for posting. i watched the whole thing and could relate to it
     
  16. Sgt Smith Bassed God

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2010
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    18,744
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    Location:
    60°55′N 101°57′E
    Sorry, buddy. I love and respect the career of stand-up, but I think.it is.one of the.most.difficult thimgs to excel at. You have good stage presence, but you are telling stories, not jokes. Condense your lead up and evolve your punchline. I think you have a shot if you can write jokes well.
     
  17. Irishwhiskey119 Banned Banned

    Joined:
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    I'm HIGHLY HIGHLY embarrassed for you TS.
     
  18. BeerAndKush #PaulieBless

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Dallas
  19. Championstuff Brown Belt Platinum Member

    Joined:
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    3,956
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    Location:
    The Terrordrang
  20. tapoutking Yellow Belt

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2006
    Messages:
    186
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    Damn bro you balls to post anythimg personal on this shitshow some of the most brutal bastards it never been my pleasure to not meet
    Keep working on it ,
     

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