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Can you guys tell me stories of a trained person being tested on their skills? Also what do I do when people make silly statements like "you do karate" etc...
Street Fight Stories?
- Thread starter MysticSnack
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A lot of gangs want me because I have pretty sick Bo Staff skills....But I have never been tested.
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what???
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If you even land on me.... it just makes me more indignant
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I was out with some friends in a fairly nondescript town in England some years back, and one of the guys we were with was - fair to say - a bit of a tool. Traveller type. Constantly banging on about going swimming with dolphins, visiting temples and wiping his arse with his hand.
Anyway, he was getting on everyone's nerves, and we were starting to distance ourselves from him a bit. Whilst we were queuing for an ATM, he got in an argument with a group of fairly lairy looking blokes. I looked over, and he'd adopted a McDojo Chop Suey Kung Foo stance and had started waving his arms around, in a vaguely threatening manner. Without blinking, the bloke he was arguing with yelled "I"M NOT FUCKING ABOUT" and steamed into him with headbutts, punches, and knees, flooring him like a sack of shit.
We all sloped off.
Anyway, he was getting on everyone's nerves, and we were starting to distance ourselves from him a bit. Whilst we were queuing for an ATM, he got in an argument with a group of fairly lairy looking blokes. I looked over, and he'd adopted a McDojo Chop Suey Kung Foo stance and had started waving his arms around, in a vaguely threatening manner. Without blinking, the bloke he was arguing with yelled "I"M NOT FUCKING ABOUT" and steamed into him with headbutts, punches, and knees, flooring him like a sack of shit.
We all sloped off.
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I got in a street brawl with 3 friends against a street gang of 10+. One of my friends got attacked as we were walking to the train after bar close. I tackled like 3 to the ground after running over and then started getting kicked / stomped by probably 3 of them while I was trying to get up. One of the people I was with was an amateur boxer + BJJ purple belt. He KO'd most of them + one of their girl friends and the others ran away. The last guy got taken down, mounted, and pounded until the police came and arrested him.
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Not really a fight story...
but back in high school I befriended this loaner who came from a small town.
A couple of months earlier I had got beaten like a dog by 4 guys (from another high school) who thought I was cocky (I was cocky, but I was standing up for a friend who they were making fun of... the friend I stood up for sat on the street curb and just watched as I was punched, kicked, and stomped in the street).
Anyway, I become friends with this kid from a small town at high school.
One day he and I are at the YMCA sitting on these chairs that look out this window over the swimming pool there. A whole bunch of guys from this other high school come walking up and I'm a bit nervous... one guy in their group is a total asskicker (Dave). I say to my friend "Just ignore them and they'll leave us alone". Some of the guys in the group were guys that had just beat me a few months earlier.
So they come walking up and this tough dude in the group says (about us) "look at the *explicit word that starts with F and ends with G*".
My friend stands up and says "we're the Fs... we're not the ones being tailed by 7 butt buddies". (Dave had 7 of his friends just following behind him).
Dave comes storming over and gets chest to chest with my friend. He looks at me and then back to my friend and says "I don't know who you are... but I know who he is (points to me).... so I'll fill you in. I'm the guy you don't f around with. I'm the guy who if you're not scared now I'll give you a reason to be scared of".
My friend says, "it's funny you mention being scared.... because I'm scared of a lot of things: little puppies....butterflies.... but for some reason you just don't do it for me."
Dave looks confused for a moment and then just starts telling my friend what he's going to do to him.... drag him down the stairs, stomp him into the blacktop, ... on and on.
My friend just stands there and lets him finish. Then my friend says, "Everything you just said to me.... I want you to think of how hard it will be for you to say tomorrow when your jaws wired shut."
It spooked Dave out. Dave was a bigger guy.... got in many fights. But the confidence of Colin just made him wilt. Dave stared for alittle bit and then said "I'll remember you" and walked away. Nothing ever happened.
but back in high school I befriended this loaner who came from a small town.
A couple of months earlier I had got beaten like a dog by 4 guys (from another high school) who thought I was cocky (I was cocky, but I was standing up for a friend who they were making fun of... the friend I stood up for sat on the street curb and just watched as I was punched, kicked, and stomped in the street).
Anyway, I become friends with this kid from a small town at high school.
One day he and I are at the YMCA sitting on these chairs that look out this window over the swimming pool there. A whole bunch of guys from this other high school come walking up and I'm a bit nervous... one guy in their group is a total asskicker (Dave). I say to my friend "Just ignore them and they'll leave us alone". Some of the guys in the group were guys that had just beat me a few months earlier.
So they come walking up and this tough dude in the group says (about us) "look at the *explicit word that starts with F and ends with G*".
My friend stands up and says "we're the Fs... we're not the ones being tailed by 7 butt buddies". (Dave had 7 of his friends just following behind him).
Dave comes storming over and gets chest to chest with my friend. He looks at me and then back to my friend and says "I don't know who you are... but I know who he is (points to me).... so I'll fill you in. I'm the guy you don't f around with. I'm the guy who if you're not scared now I'll give you a reason to be scared of".
My friend says, "it's funny you mention being scared.... because I'm scared of a lot of things: little puppies....butterflies.... but for some reason you just don't do it for me."
Dave looks confused for a moment and then just starts telling my friend what he's going to do to him.... drag him down the stairs, stomp him into the blacktop, ... on and on.
My friend just stands there and lets him finish. Then my friend says, "Everything you just said to me.... I want you to think of how hard it will be for you to say tomorrow when your jaws wired shut."
It spooked Dave out. Dave was a bigger guy.... got in many fights. But the confidence of Colin just made him wilt. Dave stared for alittle bit and then said "I'll remember you" and walked away. Nothing ever happened.
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There you go. I gave you your first 'like'. I can tell you a story, but you can see plenty of it on YouTube. As to the silly statements, just ignore them. I'll just say this. Street fighting is dangerous. Avoid it at all costs. You never know when a knife or a gun is going to make an appearance. Plus, you may have to deal with multiple opponents. If you or your opponent land on concrete or asphalt with your head, you can get seriously injured or killed. Unless they touch you or are coming at you, walk away.
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Thank you!
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I've told this story here before, but I like telling it so...
I had some big junkie dude try to mug me while I was taking a piss in an alley in philly after happy hour a few years ago.
He comes running around the corner while I'm pissing yelling "don't move don't move". I didn't really get a look at him so I'm thinking, "fuck I'm getting a ticket for public urination" assuming it's the cops when I feel hands going through my pockets. I remember wondering to myself whether or not he had a weapon, but before I had time to process that thought I had already spun around and started fighting the guy.
I barely remember the fight at all. The only memories I have are that at some point I was on the ground on my back telling myself "you've been here a million times, you're fine" and the next memory I have was feeling my forearm under his chin and immediately locking up a standing guillotine (apparently I had gotten back to my feet somehow) while yelling "are you done yet motherfucker?!" and cranking on his neck. I just kept squeezing until he stopped struggling and when I let go he just fell into a pile on the ground ala Jones vs. Machida.
Now I'm standing over him pissed off and yelling shit like "you're lucky I didn't kill you!" and "you fucked with the wrong guy!" as he starts regaining consciousness. He instantly starts apologizing when I notice one of my shoes is missing so I start yelling "where the fuck is my shoe motherfucker?!". He starts looking around on the ground and finds my shoe and hands it up to me saying, "I'm sorry sir, here's your shoe sir!"
I tell him off for a few more moments before turning around and walking away towards where my car is parked when I decide I need to tell my buddy (who I'd just been drinking with at a bar a few blocks away) about what happened. I reach in my pocket for my phone and it's not there.
So I go storming back over to the guy who at this point is still sitting on the ground. I yell, "where the FUCK is my phone?!" He pulls it out of his pocket and hands it to me.
"It's right here sir I'm sorry sir!"
I take my phone and start yelling at the guy some more when he literally starts crying, tells me he can't find his percocets, and starts mumbling something about taking care of his family and that he's never done this before and never will ever again.
I end up actually feeling sorry for the guy so I help him find his bottle of percocets, which had fallen out onto the street, gave him a little lecture/pep talk, and even handed him a couple bucks out of my wallet.
I get in my car and make it about a block before the adrenaline dump hits me. I call my friend and tell him what happens and he convinces me to come back to the bar for another drink and to calm my nerves before heading home. As I tell the story to my friend the bartender notices my face is a little messed up (not sure if I actually took some punches or it was just from grappling with the guy on the sidewalk) and by the end of the story the entire bar is listening and buying me shots lol.
Another interesting part of the story was that we had been going over basics in my BJJ class the past few weeks (i'd been training for about 5 years at that point) and we were drilling guillotines in class the day before this happened. Needless to say my coach was quite happy when I told him about it (probably would've been more happy if I'd flying triangled or gogoplata'd the guy tho)
EDIT: inb4 literally none of that happened
I had some big junkie dude try to mug me while I was taking a piss in an alley in philly after happy hour a few years ago.
He comes running around the corner while I'm pissing yelling "don't move don't move". I didn't really get a look at him so I'm thinking, "fuck I'm getting a ticket for public urination" assuming it's the cops when I feel hands going through my pockets. I remember wondering to myself whether or not he had a weapon, but before I had time to process that thought I had already spun around and started fighting the guy.
I barely remember the fight at all. The only memories I have are that at some point I was on the ground on my back telling myself "you've been here a million times, you're fine" and the next memory I have was feeling my forearm under his chin and immediately locking up a standing guillotine (apparently I had gotten back to my feet somehow) while yelling "are you done yet motherfucker?!" and cranking on his neck. I just kept squeezing until he stopped struggling and when I let go he just fell into a pile on the ground ala Jones vs. Machida.
Now I'm standing over him pissed off and yelling shit like "you're lucky I didn't kill you!" and "you fucked with the wrong guy!" as he starts regaining consciousness. He instantly starts apologizing when I notice one of my shoes is missing so I start yelling "where the fuck is my shoe motherfucker?!". He starts looking around on the ground and finds my shoe and hands it up to me saying, "I'm sorry sir, here's your shoe sir!"
I tell him off for a few more moments before turning around and walking away towards where my car is parked when I decide I need to tell my buddy (who I'd just been drinking with at a bar a few blocks away) about what happened. I reach in my pocket for my phone and it's not there.
So I go storming back over to the guy who at this point is still sitting on the ground. I yell, "where the FUCK is my phone?!" He pulls it out of his pocket and hands it to me.
"It's right here sir I'm sorry sir!"
I take my phone and start yelling at the guy some more when he literally starts crying, tells me he can't find his percocets, and starts mumbling something about taking care of his family and that he's never done this before and never will ever again.
I end up actually feeling sorry for the guy so I help him find his bottle of percocets, which had fallen out onto the street, gave him a little lecture/pep talk, and even handed him a couple bucks out of my wallet.
I get in my car and make it about a block before the adrenaline dump hits me. I call my friend and tell him what happens and he convinces me to come back to the bar for another drink and to calm my nerves before heading home. As I tell the story to my friend the bartender notices my face is a little messed up (not sure if I actually took some punches or it was just from grappling with the guy on the sidewalk) and by the end of the story the entire bar is listening and buying me shots lol.
Another interesting part of the story was that we had been going over basics in my BJJ class the past few weeks (i'd been training for about 5 years at that point) and we were drilling guillotines in class the day before this happened. Needless to say my coach was quite happy when I told him about it (probably would've been more happy if I'd flying triangled or gogoplata'd the guy tho)
EDIT: inb4 literally none of that happened
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Saw a gay dude drop a straight guy with a limp-wrested right hook from hell
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Actually I posted one recently lol
I've had trouble with these people before.
I got a knock on my door from some Mormon punks, I told them I wasn't interested but they kept insisting. This went on for a week until I got pissed off and told them not to come near my property again, one of the douchebags said "what are you gonna do about it?". I told them I would call the police and they both laughed at me and when they left they threw two eggs at me. I was livid and called the Hot Fuzz, I told them what was what and gave them the descriptions. They told me if this happens again to call them. Now 2 weeks go by and nothing happens so I think "ok I guess this is sorted" but now I see 5 of them in front of my door, I'm hesitant and grab a baseball bat. I open the door and one of the socks me with a decent straight right, the other two both land a single leg and take me down and then they all start kicking me saying "convert to Mormonism!" and they bruised me up quite a bit. I was pissed off and decided to text my good friend Nicolas Cage.
Nicolas Cage arrives and we ask around to see where those punks have gone. We drive up find out that they're about 3 blocks away, we catch up to them and we see that 3 of them are on the side walk while the other two are riding their bikes on the side of the road. Nicolas Cage turns to me and says "watch this" and had that crazy look in his eyes, so he revs up the car and floors it. We hit two of them that were riding the bike, but they didn't die. They just flew are few meters and got KO'd and were down for the count. The other 3 are pissed and say "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!", Nicolas Cage socks that motherfucker with a 1-2 combo and I take on the original guy that harassed me. I'm taking my sweet time just dominating him like Fedor did against Kohsaka, after I'm done taking out my frustrations I knock him out with a stunning knee. The other guy is scared shitless and we tell him to stop coming around my neighbourhood or else. He agrees and that was the last time I've seen any Mormon punks where I live.
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im legally not allowed to diuscuss this
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"I'm not a coward I've just never been tested, I'd like to think if I was I would pass."
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I was once pumping gas at a Speedway, this old man was staring down my ride, so I felt like he was going to steal it, ok, Ill stop, this is all bullcrap, this never happened, I never fought before
Im sorry
Im pathetic
Im sorry
Im pathetic
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