Scaring away the new guys (kinda long)

Discussion in 'Grappling Technique' started by Dogstarman, Apr 11, 2018.

  1. Dogstarman

    Dogstarman Old man jiu jitsu

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    I just remembered this story and was laughing to myself while sitting here at work bored as hell. I’ll share it. It’s really not that funny but I laughed like hell when it happened. I would also like your input on this issue as well.

    We were in class and this white belt, who had been there a couple of months but inconsistent, shows up. It’s a class of blue, purple and brown belts. There are no other white belts in class.

    This white belt, is one of those guys who has never done any type of physical activity in his life. He isn’t a fat ass but he is weak and doesn’t know how to move his body. I don’t find anything wrong with this and I am happy he is coming to class to fix this.

    So we do techniques and it’s time to spar. This class is a little more advanced and we are having some hard sparring rounds. Even the purple belt female is on fire. As a side note. She has a killer guard and is always moving, I hate being stuck in her guard, you just can’t pass it, and I outweigh her by 50 pounds.

    Anyway, I make my way through the gauntlet of these jerks (I call my training partners that lovingly) who are always trying to kill me or rip a limb off my body. I really try and avoid the white belts unless they are giants or have something that I can use to improve. Anyway, every one has done rounds with this guy. So it’s my turn.

    I wasn’t really thinking as I was in training mode. I arm dragged the guy hard. I either RNC’d or arm barred him three or four time in a row. After I did that I realized what I was doing and slowed down. I stopped and let him work in my guard. I kind of toyed with him but didn’t submit him anymore. I could tell he was annoyed but I gave him some pointers and sent him on his way.

    The next guy he went with is a great guy. He is a guy, though, that does not give any quarter. He is an old school, tough as nails, brown belt that has been training various martial arts since the early 90s. He is a black belt in whatever you name - judo, kempo, Kung fu, and boxed heavily in the early 00s. He is also in federal law enforcement. You know the type. The mid-40s guy that has a grip from hell and his hands are so calloused that his palms scratch you when he grips you.

    An example of my experience training with said brown belt: he catches me in a heel hook, in the gi, and I tap.

    I say, “come on we are in the gi, I didn’t know we were involving heel hooks.”

    He just looks at me as serious as he can, shrugs and says, “you tapped.” Then gives me a smart ass shit eating grin. We both start laughing. We joke around like that all the time.

    White belt went against this hardcore dude. After that roll the white belt guy stood up, grabbed his stuff and left. The head instructor walk’s after him and had a talk with him.

    During end of class announcements the instructor made an announcement about trying to teach the white belts, blah blah blah.

    After class, the instructor comes up to the brown belt and me and asks “what did you guys do to whitebelt guy?”

    We looked at each other and both stated we were just training.
    The instructor says, “he named both of you guys and said you were being overly aggressive.”

    We looked at each other and laughed. The instructor laughed too and said white belt guy was a pussy but we can’t be running off paying customers and to take it easy on some of the weaker white belts. We should be encouraging and teaching them. We laughed even more at that comment. We agreed to take easy on the new guys.

    That happened like 3 years ago. The instructor still talks about it today how we scare away the clientele because we are dicks. We laugh because we find it funny and we laugh because it’s true.

    What do you guys think? Should that be the way it is? I take it easy on the white belts since then. I don’t know what the brown belt does because he is always hard on me.

    Edit:I updated on post #21. Shortly after this episode, we implemented new policies and treat new belts differently. We have about 8 new guys in our gym who are happy to be there.
     
    Last edited: Apr 12, 2018
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  2. biscuitsbrah

    biscuitsbrah Black Belt

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    My school has the exact same problem. Hasn’t had a new member stay for over a year now.

    All full of old strong tough guys, some who are ex-wrestlers

    Potential to get hurt if you spaz against them is very high, because the level of intensity/strength they are willing to roll at is very high if you give them a reason
     
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  3. TheGZA

    TheGZA Excellent! But not good.

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    It's a laugh riot at this gym.
     
  4. Dogstarman

    Dogstarman Old man jiu jitsu

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    Meh. We are all on good terms. We like each other and jiu jitsu is fun.
     
  5. n.diazismylife1999

    n.diazismylife1999 Black Belt

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    Scaring away white belts who are trying something physical for the first time in their lives sure is a laugh a minute.
     
  6. Dogstarman

    Dogstarman Old man jiu jitsu

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    I did say we were assholes. Nothing new there.

    Edit.

    Also, I have changed the way I treat whitebelts now. I’m kinder and gentler.
     
  7. Cappy Goodtime

    Cappy Goodtime Hide yo wife. Hide yo neck.

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    I honestly don't see anything wrong with what you wrote. If jiu jitsu is an effective martial art, people need to learn it is effective by having it applied on them. If you know what you're doing, you can go hard on someone with there being very little risk of injury. You get better at jiu jitsu because you don't want to get smashed.
     
  8. mattemate

    mattemate Brown Belt

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    Haha this post was great.

    I try to be easy on whitebelts until they get rough with me, then it's on.

    My coach gives me the evil eye sometimes though. I've been know to kneebar a whitebelt or two
     
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2018
  9. Dogstarman

    Dogstarman Old man jiu jitsu

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    I’m a kinder and gentler guy now. I don’t just smash whitebelts anymore.
     
  10. Forceof1

    Forceof1 Blue Belt

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    I dislike spending a round with a white belt as much as the next guy. But...

    1. I like the gym I'm at. I want it to stay in business. Therefore, I am nice to the white belts an encourage them. Who knows, that white belt in 6months to a year could be my favorite guy to roll with while trying new stuff.
    2. I remember the thrill of rolling with a purple belt for the first time when I was a white belt. It felt like they were a fucking jedi. That motivated me to get that good someday (still unsure if I've reached Jedi status as a brown). I know white belts get excited when I ask them to roll.
    3. If they are strong / aggressive, I'll match their intensity so they know bjj works. Why train it if it doesn't? But if they are timid, weak, etc, I'll flow and let them feel how well it works that way.

    I guess I don't like being a dick to any training partner. Don't see how it helps the art or the gym. If I see someone going hard on white belts, I'll typically roll with them next and go harder than usual, then tell them to stop doing it.
     
  11. Russky

    Russky Green Belt

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    Agreed.
     
  12. jr jr

    jr jr Purple Belt

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    Its a fine line.

    There are guys who walk in the door that are tough guys. They think they are tough and they doubt you have anything to show them. I give these guys a beating. Its especially good if they outweigh me by 30 lbs and are half my age (I am mid 40's). You earn this guys respect and he gives it.

    Other guys have no confidence. They believe they are weak and can never be strong, or athletic, or walk and chew gum. I don't think I have to prove to this person that we have something to teach him/her. They know it already, they just don't think they could ever do it. It took more courage for them to walk in the door than it takes for me to do just about anything. This guy gets brought through slowly. I may even sit out a session of sparing to watch with this new whitebelt. I like to watch two guys going at it. I like to point out two rolling for flow (possibly one just back from an injury).

    I cant work out without partners......I need new ones in the doors to feed on........
     
  13. j123

    j123 Pro Sherdogger 500-0-1

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    When I read the title, I thought OP started using deep oil checks and it scared everyone off
     
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  14. Evan_The_Kid_1

    Evan_The_Kid_1 Brown Belt

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    Thats one perk of LL that I like is not getting the stink eye for leg-locking white belts
     
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  15. kenpeters8

    kenpeters8 Purple Belt

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    I know this guy that's an acquaintance and he always tries to joke around with new guys by making gay comments. He'll ask them weird shits such as "have you ever trained with a gay guy? How do you feel about a gay guy putting you in a triangle choke?" Some actually gets scared away and never came back. It's kinda annoying.
     
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  16. jack36767

    jack36767 Brown Belt

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    I have this tendency sometimes, if I’m trying to roll light or at least not be a dick, and a big ass white belt starts going hard on me.. I’ll match their intensity.. still under control. No neck cranks or leg locks or anything else dirtyThen after the roll they suddenly complain about me “using too much strength”. They outweighed me by a large amount

    I just roll my eyes and move on
     
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  17. beat...people...up?

    beat...people...up? White Belt

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    I guess on the bright side he scares off the homophobes.
     
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  18. trustdoesntrust

    trustdoesntrust Purple Belt

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    I think a lot of this is on your instructor. One of the biggest mistakes I see a lot of instructors make is thinking the coaching stops when the rolling starts. I think coaches generally should monitor mat behavior, and set a general tone of how people should interact. Along these lines, the coach can place different people together, and give specific instructions to one or both for how to approach the roll. Additionally, the instructor can apply helpful restrictions to a given round ("only armbars") rather than just every roll being a fight to the death.
     
  19. Foppa21

    Foppa21 Brown Belt

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    It is until you run out of training partners. Running rough shod over someone who can't defend themselves makes you a bully. If it's mutual, all good and proceed BAU.

    For every person that comes home with gi scratches on their face, there's another that won't come back. You as a fellow student may not have to respect that but the owner of the school does. Furthermore, people get into the sport of different reasons.

    In saying all this, if the fella looked around the room and it was communicated that it was going to be a hard session and he chose to stay, he's gotta lump it
     
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  20. Woldog

    Woldog Boxer

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    We have a pro boxer at my gym who has never won a fight (Amateur or Pro) so he takes it out on the new guys. He's technically a trainer though what he's training people for I don't know (how to lose fights?) and he constantly coaxes people in to sparring by saying 40% and shit like that, then tries to go Mike Tyson on them and occasionally he knocks someone out then says it was an accident. When I spar him I like to wear my Fairtex BGV9's that are not designed for sparring because they're hard as rocks. Damn it feels good to open up a cut on his face and watching him sook saying you're going to hard in sparring when in reality he bullies people day in day out. I wish he'd fuck off from the gym like this white belt did.
     

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