principal: "kids who are bullied need to be less annoying"; cyber-bullying and digital self harm

I think you got it here. There are a lot of ways he could have said the same thing without coming off like a dick. There's a huge difference in reception between "be less annoying" and "here's how to join a conversation," or whatever.
i wasnt aware that only "annoying "kids were bullied.....
this asshole runs a school?
 
Lets be real here tho...

The mere act of liking something that others deem lame is enough to get picked on.

God forbid someone goes to school with a Gir or Zim puffy sticker(do they still make puffy stickers?) on their binder.

Granted, liking these things have become more mainstream but lets not act like the times have changed that much. Kids still find a way to alienate
 
I’m not gonna pretend I listened to some random dudes YouTube rant, but from reading the article he states that the kids should be taught to be less annoying by their parents. I think that’s legit.

I guess you’re arguing that all the other kids at school will now say”principal soandso says it’s your fault you’re being bullied.” I guess that holds credence but I don’t remember giving a shit about my principals opinion.

I thought his message of pointing out some of your child’s failings to them was on point. I’m glad my parents did it to me. It wasn’t perfect but it helped me in many ways.

No, I'm saying that by doing it in a way that creates this controversy he's going to be less trusted by the very people he's tyring to get his message to.

Pointing out your child's failings to them, depending on how beaten up their mindset is, can basically be bullying them all over again. What they need to do is help their children grow into the missing skill sets. Which is what this principal, if he really wanted to help them, would be doing by setting up talks and / or programs instead of shooting his mouth off about why the kids' failings are contributing to the problem.

The actions he have taken will make the children who need help less receptive to them. That's because he's more interested in "speaking the truth" than actually helping kids. imo.
 
I think it's pretty easy to understand her message. People don't always choose the best words, especially when they are 16 and emotional like that.
I agree. And sometimes people are just always assholes. That's why I'm a big supporter of the concept that people should be responsible for their own emotions. No one can "make" you feel a certain way or respond a certain way, especially if it's just words.
 
"Cyber-bullying"

<JagsKiddingMe>

These pussies need to post in the OT.

@BTard will teach 'em the ropes.

The ones who won't kill themselves will turn into functional human beings.
Send 'em over, we'll thin the herd. We got @Coconut Joe on life support, he needs new blood, and @Sketch is looking for some fresh safe space dwelling millenials to sink his 3 teeth into.
 
As a school principal I doubt he’s not interested in helping kids, he may be incompetent. He’s approaching it by sending out YouTube videos. Which I admit is pretty fuckin weak. But I dont think that invalidates his point. If it’s as @MicroBrew said above, he just doesn’t want to deal with bullying and is covering his own ass, that’s a problem. There is nothing here to suggest that’s his only solution. But I think teaching your kids not to annoy the shit out of people is a good skill.

Let me get personal here. I’m thirty and I’ve been playing dungeons and dragons since I was 13 or 14. Last month we kicked a 28 year old man out of our group because he’s fuckin annoying and doesn’t seem to have a solid grasp on how to interact with people. I’ve always been friends with weirdos and deal with their weirdo shit. It doesn’t mean that I didn’t put in work to myself in my prepubescent days to not annoy the shit out of people and interact in an enjoyable manner. I’m a well adjusted adult, he isn’t. He enjoys being in this obnoxious role in social situations and it has consequences (even if they’re lame, like being kicked out of a dnd group). Someone should’ve said some shit to him when he was 12. Now that he’s 28 it seems to me like he’s fucked.
The kids I noticed who got picked on in school, never bugged anyone, they kept to themselves or were shy/unforcefull. The principle is making it seem it is the victim's fault, that they did something to bring upon bullying, when there is no reason to assume that. Some kids/people are just assholes and like to pick on others. The people being picked on shouldn't be assumed to have brought it on themselves.
 
I know its not PC but there is some truth there. Kids learned from bullying, twisted as it may seem. You learn how far you can push people, you learn your limitations, you learn how to cope with unpleasant situations. These are all things I think are lacking in our kids development these days. Its important, IMO, to learn these things when you're a kid.

The kids at patkland sure learned how far you can push someone.
 
The kids at patkland sure learned how far you can push someone.
The kid who shot everyone clearly had no coping skills. His response to being picked on was extreme because he hadn't learned another way.
 
People should bully kids more often. Except for Nicolas Cruz, that guy should not have been brutally ignored by the people he was harassing.
 
The kids I noticed who got picked on in school, never bugged anyone, they kept to themselves or were shy/unforcefull. The principle is making it seem it is the victim's fault, that they did something to bring upon bullying, when there is no reason to assume that. Some kids/people are just assholes and like to pick on others. The people being picked on shouldn't be assumed to have brought it on themselves.

I agree it shouldn’t be assumed of them but I don’t think you can force kids to not bully other kids, it’s not a realistic goal. I think you can teach the bullied to recognize their breakdown in the equation and teach them ways to overcome that. But as JosephDredd pointed out above depending on how beaten down their mindset I acknowledge that can be potentially destructive.

And I guess I didn’t see much of the bullying that seems to be mainly alluded to in this thread, where some kid is just getting his lunch money stolen for nothing. The closest I saw was some kid run down an empty hallway to shove me one time as I walked to class. I squared up to him talked shit, he did nothing and his friends down the hallway apologized for him as I continued walking to class. I saw something like that...4? times in 4 years of high school.

What I saw that I though was more rampant and problematic was the ignoring of kids and leaving them out of social events and y’all don’t seem to think that’s a problem at all. I think there’s a disconnect on my view of bullying compared to most of you in here.
 
I agree it shouldn’t be assumed of them but I don’t think you can force kids to not bully other kids, it’s not a realistic goal. I think you can teach the bullied to recognize their breakdown in the equation and teach them ways to overcome that. But as JosephDredd pointed out above depending on how beaten down their mindset I acknowledge that can be potentially destructive.

And I guess I didn’t see much of the bullying that seems to be mainly alluded to in this thread, where some kid is just getting his lunch money stolen for nothing. The closest I saw was some kid run down an empty hallway to shove me one time as I walked to class. I squared up to him talked shit, he did nothing and his friends down the hallway apologized for him as I continued walking to class. I saw something like that...4? times in 4 years of high school.

What I saw that I though was more rampant and problematic was the ignoring of kids and leaving them out of social events and y’all don’t seem to think that’s a problem at all. I think there’s a disconnect on my view of bullying compared to most of you in here.
Kids who bully should be warned and given detention or suspension,depending on the severity of the harassment . And if they are young kids , they should receive education on why their behavior is wrong. . If they persist, then kick them out of school.

Let's just admit that some people are naturally assholes. They have no empathy ; and it could be biological. There are biological reasons for sociopathy and psychopathy, atleast in some people.
 
Kids who bully should be warned and given detention or suspension,depending on the severity of the harassment . And if they are young kids , they should receive education on why their behavior is wrong. . If they persist, then kick them out of school.

Let's just admit that some people are naturally assholes. They have no empathy ; and it could be biological. There are biological reasons for sociopathy and psychopathy, atleast in some people.


No doubt.
 
Have to disagree with the principal on that one. My cousin did her PhD on bullying and one of the few things I learned is that bullies are often victims in their own lives (something about locus of control) and this is how they respond to it.

So while the bullied might be annoying kids, it's not why they're bullied. They're bullied because one of the other kids lacks the skills to deal with them without resorting to anti-social behavior. Being annoying isn't the root of the problem. Teaching your kid to not be annoying just changes who gets bullied and changes why they get bullied but it doesn't stop bullying.
 
OK, I'm combining two threads into one because they're both about children's inabilities to deal with hurt.







http://www.kptv.com/story/38000109/...deo-stating-bullied-kids-tend-to-annoy-people



I feel like this man is not actually interested in helping students as much as he wants to "tell it like it is".







https://www.npr.org/sections/health...hemselves?utm_medium=RSS&utm_campaign=science




(Digital self-harm article not quoted in full. Full article at link.)

Are children's lives only getting more difficult with technology? It seems to be the case in many different ways, from the new opportunities it offers people to hurt them to the way the sheer immersion in technology and porn rewires their brains.

These assholes tell kids to deal with shit like this themselves and then happily benefit from all the laws and protections society provides for the EXACT same behavior from grown up bullies. It is beyond stupid.

I am pretty sure I could get that principle to appeal to authority for help real quick after I start bullying him. What a fucking dumb ass.
 
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I agree it shouldn’t be assumed of them but I don’t think you can force kids to not bully other kids, it’s not a realistic goal. I think you can teach the bullied to recognize their breakdown in the equation and teach them ways to overcome that. But as JosephDredd pointed out above depending on how beaten down their mindset I acknowledge that can be potentially destructive.

And I guess I didn’t see much of the bullying that seems to be mainly alluded to in this thread, where some kid is just getting his lunch money stolen for nothing. The closest I saw was some kid run down an empty hallway to shove me one time as I walked to class. I squared up to him talked shit, he did nothing and his friends down the hallway apologized for him as I continued walking to class. I saw something like that...4? times in 4 years of high school.

What I saw that I though was more rampant and problematic was the ignoring of kids and leaving them out of social events and y’all don’t seem to think that’s a problem at all. I think there’s a disconnect on my view of bullying compared to most of you in here.

Social isolation is cruel, but unfortunately you can't necessarily change that dynamic. I still see it in the workplace with adults, and as a manager I can address it, but I can't force most mentalities to change despite professional mediators, informal conflict management resolution ( 2nd step in the process after my initial intervention). In 12 years, I can't recall a case of social ostracism to be reversed long term, despite harassment grievances against several people in the group. It's really not pleasant.
 
Of course bullied kids are annoying ; they're often "weird" or fat and have never developed any kind of social skills. Add in the "zero tolerance" policy for fighting and kids who aren't willing to get in trouble for breaking the rules are prime targets for bullying. As for the technology side that's a whole different animal... basically impossible to get away from it even if you're not actively engaged with it. Other kids are engaged with it and will give you shit the next day in school.

The only way for a bullied kid to be able to get through it is to fight. I was a fat ginger kid growing up with big ears and I started going bald at age 12. I also did TKD and American Kickboxing. So while I was training at a McDojo I still had striking skills, and especially kicking skills, which were unexpected. I laid out a few kids with a kick to the gut that they weren't expecting and it was the only way to stop the bullying. Of course I got in trouble for it... now a days I probably would have been expelled simply for defending myself. I had one particularly bad bully and this shit went on for an entire school year. I had contacted the Dean, the Principal, security guard... everything I could but they weren't interested in doing anything about it... likely thought I was annoying. Finally this piece of shit (I was 6th grade and he was 8th...MUCH bigger than me) was waiting for me at my house when I was walking home from school. I let him have right there in front of my house... dropped him with a straight punch to the chin, jumped on him, and beat his face into the asphalt. Next time I saw that piece of shit he crossed the road to get away from me.
 
The kid who shot everyone clearly had no coping skills. His response to being picked on was extreme because he hadn't learned another way.
Or because irresponsible adults like you allowed him to receive continual abuse. You and your type are the problem not the solution.
 
Or because irresponsible adults like you allowed him to receive continual abuse. You and your type are the problem not the solution.
Nah, no one bit on this. Try again some other day.
 
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