Not in the mood. Have you ever convinced someone to have sex and is that bad?

[Stargazer Rex]

If my wife is not in the mood I wait until she is sleeping and jerkoff on her.

 

[Phlog]

That is the correct word, and is never appropriate in a sexual relationship.

Millennials.

since my wife only puts out once every other month, is going to be the end of our relationship.

Maybe you aren't in the best situation to be waxing lyrical upon how to have a good sex life?

A lot of women like to be dominated. Sex is more complicated than yes and no. Such things are for retards that can't understand meaning. No can be said with a coy smile. Yes can be said with an emotionless tone that should be a massive boner killer.

Plenty of women said yes to weinstein, just because they wanted work and they agreed it was the price of business. They knew all the ramifications and only went through with it because they wanted more dollars to buy shiny things. They said yes but weinstein was in the wrong to accept said affirmation.

It's more complicated than you suggest. Such simplification is for those that need it, not for the majority.

 

[Turtlejuice]

To a degree, one person always (or at least most of the time) convinces the other person to have sex, especially if you've been together a while. It depends on what "convincing someone to have sex" entails.

 

[Kframe]

Millennials.



Maybe you aren't in the best situation to be waxing lyrical upon how to have a good sex life?

A lot of women like to be dominated. Sex is more complicated than yes and no. Such things are for retards that can't understand meaning. No can be said with a coy smile. Yes can be said with an emotionless tone that should be a massive boner killer.

Plenty of women said yes to weinstein, just because they wanted work and they agreed it was the price of business. They knew all the ramifications and only went through with it because they wanted more dollars to buy shiny things. They said yes but weinstein was in the wrong to accept said affirmation.

It's more complicated than you suggest. Such simplification is for those that need it, not for the majority.

I am "waxing lyrical" about what i want in a partner. Said that the whole thread. Want and have are two different thing.

I am against all this coercion nonsense in part because in the past in our failed relationship i have tried it and it proved unsuccessful. The other part as stated is that when i strike out into the market again, i know what i want in a partner, and someone i have to coerce and cajole into sex is not what i want. I don't think it is right or healthy.

Yes, plenty of women said yes to him, and that is why their situations fit the definition of rape. He coerced yes out of them with his power, under the implied threat to their career.

 

[Phlog]

I am "waxing lyrical" about what i want in a partner. Said that the whole thread. Want and have are two different thing.

I am against all this coercion nonsense in part because in the past in our failed relationship i have tried it and it proved unsuccessful. The other part as stated is that when i strike out into the market again, i know what i want in a partner, and someone i have to coerce and cajole into sex is not what i want. I don't think it is right or healthy.

Yes, plenty of women said yes to him, and that is why their situations fit the definition of rape. He coerced yes out of them with his power, under the implied threat to their career.

I coerce affirmations out of women with my dominant genetics and implied threat that they'll never have stronger babies with any other man.

 

[Kframe]

I coerce affirmations out of women with my dominant genetics and implied threat that they'll never have stronger babies with any other man.

I thought you were at least reasonable. Now your talking like a misogynist..

I am done with this thread. I am not going to convince a bunch of PUA's that coercion is wrong in a relationship, and they wont convince me to use their mind games on women. I have stated my position that coercion is wrong and stand by it. I am for communication and honesty, not coercion.

 

[Kframe]

So turning your partner on, then having sex is rape? Dangerous ground we're treading here.

Don't use mind games and Coercion.

 

[I Am Legion]

This topic is so crazy right now. If i get told “not in the mood “ , and then I get her in the mood and she changes her mind, that’s isn’t rape, that’s skills.

 

[Phlog]

I thought you were at least reasonable. Now your talking like a misogynist..

I am done with this thread. I am not going to convince a bunch of PUA's that coercion is wrong in a relationship, and they wont convince me to use their mind games on women. I have stated my position that coercion is wrong and stand by it. I am for communication and honesty, not coercion.

What I'm saying is that all sex is a transaction and their are many forms that transaction can take be it love, pleasure, money career, status etc.

I don't care if some rich guy offers women a lot of money to sleep with him. I don't care that some women decide to sleep with men for money.

FWIW I don't care if a man decides to sleep with a woman for money either, in case you think I'm still being misogynistic.

You're attempting to make something that is very complex into a simple binary and that is why your position is untenable, why you are failing to convince people. You are leaving because you cannot adequately defend your position and have resorted to merely repeating the same clearly reductionist, virtue signalling position.

 

[I Am Legion]

Definitely an interesting question.

I agree with @Mike that relationship dynamics are constantly in flux, so though it sounds harsh when worded this way, oftentimes each party is working to get the other to do things they wouldn't independently want to do. It's a subtle art (or it should be anyway) but in good relationships the long term consequence is two people who have successfully read enough cues over time that they're able to make each other very happy - without becoming unhappy about their own (adjusted) behaviour. Sexual persuasion is just another set of these cues and is on-side and acceptable imo. A relationship between people with very different sex drives would never survive otherwise.

Among my circle of friends, and I suspect on Sherdog as well, what's more controversial is whether your significant other has some obligation to sexually perform when you have the desire to, even when she doesn't. On this my answer is a firm no. My ex tried this once near the beginning of the relationship, and I gave her shit for not standing up for herself more when she was clearly not in the mood. I can honestly say I don't want to have sex with a girl who isn't into it the way I am, but I haven't found that's a general consensus among men.

In a perfect world sure. But when you are married with kids, sometimes it is just a quickie release. Men and women both have needs. When you marry, you are stating that those needs can only be met by that other person. Sometimes my wife just needs to snuggle up on the couch after a long day....well I want to be left alone and or go to the gym. But part of my job is to meet her needs. So I do my job. Sometimes that’s sex.

 

[MaxMMA]

So its now rape if a girl doesn't want to have sex with you, and you flirt/woo your way into her panties?

The fuck...

 

[Bald1]

Don't use mind games and Coercion.

Quit projecting, and look up the meaning of coercion. There are many ways of changing minds and ramping up the chances of success. Your mind going straight to strong arm tactics or manipulation is quite telling.

 

[Turtlejuice]

I thought you were at least reasonable. Now your talking like a misogynist..

I am done with this thread. I am not going to convince a bunch of PUA's that coercion is wrong in a relationship, and they wont convince me to use their mind games on women. I have stated my position that coercion is wrong and stand by it. I am for communication and honesty, not coercion.

If you're expecting a woman to want to have sex with you at the same time as you want to have sex with her purely by coincidence, with no effort what so ever on your part or her part to encourage the situation, then you're never going to have sex again.

 

[TankAbbott4Eva]

I never get told no so I can't really contribute to this thread sorry.

 

[Bull Terrier]

So the times my gf has convinced me have sex when I wasn't initially in the mood she actually sexually assaulted, or even raped me?

I must remember to share this with my friends so they can rip the absolute piss out of me for the rest of my life.

 

[MikeMcMann]

Your wife after just having a baby and feeling insecure as hell, struggles to feel like a sexual and desired person again and your sex life is temporary dead.

This is one of the most common situations ever expressed by couples whose sex life changes after a baby.

So now the man tells his wife, she looks great, she is sexy and beautiful to him and he slowly convinces her ...and to people like Kframe, they are rapist and monsters.

 

[Nesruk]

Turning your partner on is a part of a relationship. Of course you got to actually use your brain and if you see that she clearly isn't getting turned (when you are trying to seduce her) you cut your losses and take matters into your own hands.

As someone else wrote as well, each and every time you just got to read the situation and act accordingly. Some women even like it when you "force" yourself on them, which you can CLEARLY see on their body language and their look. No guy with average IQ will fail to understand if a woman says no and means it or says no with a look in her eye that says "ravish me".

Also, Kframe was either raped or did rape someone.

 

[ralphc1]

Yeah, I see the difference. If two people have an established sexual rapport and it's just an 'eh I don't feel like it' not in the mood, vs. a real 'no', then in that case nagging can be harmlessly cute at worst, or at best turn to hot. As long as a person respects 'no' then I see no problem with it.

When a person who does not have that kind of relationship is just continually trying to get in the pants of someone who is clearly not interested, then it's a different creepy story.

How do two people get into a relationship in the first place? Do two people who don't know each other just suddenly decide they are destined to be together? Do their parents select their children's mates?

I've seen people who didn't even like each other when they first met, end up getting together. I was recently at a 50th wedding anniversary where the man said he had to stalk his wife for a year before she would date him. People don't always have the same desires at the same time and sometimes need some warming up. Some women want to have sex with someone but don't want to seem easy and make the guy work for the opportunity.

The same thing happens in other species where the female rejects the first advances only to eventually mate with a male they originally rejected. It's the natural way that things happen. Persistence is encoded in our DNA.

 

[DrVanNostrand]

Persistence beats resistance

 

[ralphc1]

I’ve been with my wife for 17 years now. We have a two year old and two 5 month olds twins.

There have been many times where I’ve bargained for sex with her.

Marriage foreplay often involves a lot of begging.