My best friend has taken a b1tch fit

BisexualMMA said:
1. It's possible that he feels a need to degrade as part of keeping you as a friend, but I'd consider it more likely that he feels a need to degrade people in general whenever he thinks he can get away with it. He's opened that door with you now and it's probably going to be difficult to close it again. You're a scratching post.
2. Yes.
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The other thing is - the guy is best friends with this fucking social recluse who's a pill addict and generally has withdrawn from life.
He seems to like to hang out with those who he perhaps considers beneath him - possibly - I'm trying to logic the situation out here.

He hangs with another dude who has traumatic brain injury and has difficulty stringing sentences together.
When I met him - I was, and still am, going through medical treatment.
Maybe he figured I was a broken individual - but then as time passed, got a sense that I'm actually going places - and resented that?

Again - I'm trying to apply logic to make sense of this situation, where I currently stand - and whether or not I should keep sporadically trying with the guy in the hope of rekindling the good times we had before - or just fucking put and end and block his number.
 
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And if it is really an ego thing with him and he was attempting to undermine me to feel more secure about himself around me - wouldn't that make him a pathetic tool?

And wouldn't he feel like shit about himself - knowing that?
 
EatMyShorts said:
And if it is really an ego thing with him and he was attempting to undermine me to feel more secure about himself around me - wouldn't that make him a pathetic tool?

And wouldn't he feel like shit about himself - knowing that?
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1. Yes.

2. Yes.
 
BisexualMMA said:
1. Yes.

2. Yes.
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Well - if that were the case - wouldn't that force him to challenge his own behaviour and attitude?

Is it possible he's in internal conflict and turmoil - as a result of - this situation between myself and himself?

I really require a substantiated answer
 
EatMyShorts said:
Well - if that were the case - wouldn't that force him to challenge his own behaviour and attitude?

Is it possible he's in internal conflict and turmoil - as a result of - this situation between myself and himself?

I really require a substantiated answer
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1. Nope. Such people will continue to do what they're comfortable with. If he can't put you below him in the pecking order to feel better, he'll spend more time with friends that allow it to happen and the cycle will continue.

2. Yes, it's possible. But he's opened the can of worms of using you as a stepladder and it might be hard for him to go back.
 
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EatMyShorts said:
Well - when I say "best friend" - I know him for about a year, just over.
We started hanging at the gym, then outside the gym.
He's a talking machine - where I'm not a phenomenal conversationalist myself - he makes up for that - and he's just totally chill and laid back.

So, we were hanging for months, he'd stop by my house in town, we'd get some munchies, head out to the nightclub hitting on chicks together etc - crash the night.
Rinse repeat.

Just a cool guy - we'd vibed so well of each other, a bunch of us started hanging together - same deal, heading out, hitting on chicks.

One night we went out and, it was like, high school girls grad party.
I tongue punched so many of them 18 year old chicks - groped on them etc - great time, overall.
Was the same deal - 4 or 5 of us went out.
In terms of quality and quantity of girls picked up, I left the rest of the guys in the dust but - I got the feeling everyone had an ace night.

About a month later - same deal.

Except, we were all doing the usual at my place before, cooking up some munchies, having a few drinks - and this dude - we'll call him, Mister X - who is the best friend to whom I'm referring - he suddenly comes out with this comment out of left field.
Like - he's normally a fun dude, having a laugh and banter, ribbing each other a little - sure.

But this - kind of stopped me in my tracks, I was like, "woah".

Then - few minutes later, same thing.
Then again, and again - this pretty fucking malicious comments.
Now I know the dude for about 6 months, and he's never behaved like this so - I'm a bit stunned and don't now how to respond.

As he persists - I realise he's making me look like a total jerk off/soft touch, in front of my housemates - whom we're also chilling with.

After a while, I say I gotta hit the can.
I go, wash, get changed for going out etc.
Whilst in the can, it occurs to me - if this dude is saying this nasty shit - maybe he thinks it's banter.
Just say something back to him.
Duh.... right?

So - we're back in the kitchen, chilling, talking, laughing.
On queue - another nasty comment comes along.

I respond, with something - quite benign.

"Oh - that's probably cause you take it up the ass, right?"

The dude looks like someones just tossed a bucket of ice water on him.
He clearly wasn't expecting a retort - generally I don't rib people cause, my sense of humor can be a little course and it doesn't resonate with some people.
But I was super self aware making this comment - exactly the intention - to retort, but not aggressively.

The moment passed - but I get this funny vibe off the dude - like he's looking at me in a different light, and he doesn't seem to like what he's seeing.

We're walking into town (I live close by) later - and he makes another comment.
I respond by saying, "haha - you I'm gonna start hitting you back with this shit, right?".

That's what I said,

"It was a fucking joke!!"

He gives it - the first time he's ever bee remotely confrontational.

We get in the nightclub.
It's clear the dude is ignoring me; not only that but, it's like he's trying to exclude me from the group.

Whatever - doesn't bother me.
I'm hitting on chicks left and right, no bother.
I'm tall, strong, pretty good looking - I can play this game.
I'm having a good night.

He continues to try and blank me.

The night goes on - I score multiple women.
He looks like he's having a horrible night, and about 2am, leaves without saying a word.


Alright that night passes.

About a week later, him and another dude drop around to my house.
Same thing - talking shit - about girls we picked up, or tried to pick up, or are trying to pick up.

He shows me this pic on his phone of a girl he likes,

"Pfff - you might be punching about your weight there pal" - I give it.
This gets a good round of laughter.

"Fuck you you sorry cunt" - deadly serious.
I ignore it.

The dude seems like - for all his claims about loving "banter" and "ribbing" - he takes it like a fucking virgin.

Fast forward - this scene repeats itself a couple more times.

Then he stops calling around.
Occasional efforts in terms of a text message saying "what's up".
Beyond that - it's clear the guy is trying to dissipate the friendship - put distance between us cause, over the previous space of time, we had gotten pretty tight.

And just now I shot him a message asking how he was doing.

Basically received a very short curt reply - which insinuated - "go fuck yourself".

Yet he might hit me up a month from now asking if I want to go to the gym.

Is it an ego thing?
He's trying to maintain contact with me - just cause he's so butt hurt and wants to try and get one back?
A dominance thing?

When we hung, he did show occasional signs of a bad-ass wannaba like, "do you know who I am!!??"
It recognized it as pathetic but, his personality was so chatty and endearing that, I couldn't help but just ignore it.


How does that sound to you guys - apart from a long ass read??
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You have an interesting style of writing TS. I read the whole thing because of that.

I guess is that he was cool with you when he thought you were "on his level" so to speak. Maybe he thought he could be the alpha in his interactions with you. But then he was jealous of your success with girls and having fun, so he tries to cut you down to make himself feel better. While not quite the same, I have known guys who are kind of this. Ego makes people do weird things. I say just stop hanging out with him.
 
What a weird story.

And by weird I mean homosexual.
 
its a you two aren't adults thing.



you could actually just ask him whats bothering him
 
Pugilistic said:
You have an interesting style of writing TS. I read the whole thing because of that.

I guess is that he was cool with you when he thought you were "on his level" so to speak. Maybe he thought he could be the alpha in his interactions with you. But then he was jealous of your success with girls and having fun, so he tries to cut you down to make himself feel better. While not quite the same, I have known guys who are kind of this. Ego makes people do weird things. I say just stop hanging out with him.
Click to expand...

Yes - this seems to sum up effectively the situation - I believe that to be the case.

Funny old world.
 
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