#metoo applies to married couples, too

[Jimmy Jazz]

They divorced anyways, which was the obvious and inevitable outcome of the situation. He just suffered through years of bizarre sex with book covers staring back at him in the meantime.

Both of the people in this story made bizarre choices, leading to this bizarre story. For her part, these choices were motivated by fear. We can only assume his motivations, because the author doesn't go to any length to humanize the poor sap. But none of their motivations were rational, IMO.

youd be suprised man. I know guys who are married who havent gotten laid in 10 years. sometimes men do it for the kids or because they dont want to get ripped off. or they have some misplaced affection. I assume when you say fear you dont mean bodily harm. I'm sure getting screwed in divorce is alot like being sentenced to having your penis cut off. sure its inevitable but wouldnt you much rather it happen later than sooner?

 

[Amerikuracana]

Ok but no definition of rape used today has "outside of the marriage" as an element so why even bring it up?

Because it's the first definition you learn in law school.

 

[indo80]

"But I blamed myself. I was the one whose desire was “deficient,” according to my husband and our sex-obsessed culture. When multiple couples therapists over several years made no significant impact, I blamed myself again: I should have been more forceful when I said my dark truth."

She was on the right track when she began to blame herself. It's too bad she abandoned critical self-reflection and replaced it with an external locus of control.

who knows perhaps she needs a lesbian relationship as men generally cant provide daily therapy sessions. I cant imagine being married to someone who is in so much emotional turmoil.....cant believe he stuck to her for so long and maybe he had great intentions such as doing it for the kids.

 

[HunterSdVa29]

well ya, marital rape has been a concept since like the 50s.....(good lawd for women before that time period)

on another note, if a women/wife stops allowing intercourse, what do they honestly expect will happen? Obviously not rape, but perhaps cheating/infidelity? At the very least massive resentment? Unless she is the breadwinner, one can make a pretty strong argument that the only reason men are in relationships w/ women is for the action.....It's certainly not paying for their meals and watching the Bachelorette if you feel me

 

[mb23100]

Hmm doesn’t seem to odd reading from the side. Doggy would also work.

Well I personally cannot read a book on my side. Doggy seems like it would be hard on the neck. Maybe belly down with your head off the bed and the book on the ground but then again how do you focus on reading small print while getting pounded from behind?

 

[indo80]

youd be suprised man. I know guys who are married who havent gotten laid in 10 years. sometimes men do it for the kids or because they dont want to get ripped off. or they have some misplaced affection. I assume when you say fear you dont mean bodily harm. I'm sure getting screwed in divorce is alot like being sentence to having your penis cut off. sure its inevitable but wouldnt you much rather it happen later than sooner?

Sex in your late 30's isnt what it is in your 20's..... my point is sex doesnt solely dictate how great a relationship is as you can have a great marriage at an older age but also have a lot less sex. I agree with your points though as divorce can be a terrible option in most cases as long as the marriage is decent.

 

[Prokofievian]

youd be suprised man. I know guys who are married who havent gotten laid in 10 years. sometimes men do it for the kids or because they dont want to get ripped off. or they have some misplaced affection. I assume when you say fear you dont mean bodily harm. I'm sure getting screwed in divorce is alot like being sentence to having your penis cut off. sure its inevitable but wouldnt you much rather it happen later than sooner?

I know one guy who is divorced, but still lives in the same house with his wife something like 20 years later. They had an arrangement whereby he'd have to leave his house when his ex-wife would have other men over. That situation is weird as fuck, and the children resented both parents for it.

On the other hand I know a guy who had a total nightmare of a divorce. His ex-wife's parents come from money, so they had one hell of a lawyer, too. He's extremely happy, however. He moved on, recently found another wife, and in looking for her, bagged himself a tonne of pussy.

I don't see the rationale for tolerating an undignified existence.

 

[HunterSdVa29]

this is also oddly familiar to that Black Mirror ep where the people bang while looking at visual implants of different memories to escape

 

[indo80]

well ya, marital rape has been a concept since like the 50s.....(good lawd for women before that time period)

on another note, if a women/wife stops allowing intercourse, what do they honestly expect will happen? Obviously not rape, but perhaps cheating/infidelity? At the very least massive resentment? Unless she is the breadwinner, one can make a pretty strong argument that the only reason men are in relationships w/ women is for the action.....It's certainly not paying for their meals and watching the Bachelorette if you feel me

a lot of women who withhold sex in marriage are internally pretty ok with their spouse cheating as long as it doesnt come back to them

 

[Amerikuracana]

Sex in your late 30's isnt what it is in your 20's..... my point is sex doesnt solely dictate how great a relationship is as you can have a great marriage at an older age but also have a lot less sex. I agree with your points though as divorce can be a terrible option in most cases as long as the marriage is decent.

If you aren't having sex at least 3 days a week, with passion, that's not your wife.

 

[Jimmy Jazz]

I know one guy who is divorced, but still lives in the same house with his wife something like 20 years later. They had an arrangement whereby he'd have to leave his house when his ex-wife would have other men over. That situation is weird as fuck, and the children resented both parents for it.

On the other hand I know a guy who had a total nightmare of a divorce. His ex-wife's parents come from money, so they had one hell of a lawyer, too. He's extremely happy, however. He moved on, recently found another wife, and in looking for her, bagged himself a tonne of pussy.

I don't see the rationale for tolerating an undignified existence.

I wouldnt know how to deal with it. Thats why I don't plan on getting married. The situation is different for everyone, because i know a ton of guys who seperated or divorced and now for a variety of reason have to pay money and don't see their kids/ kids are poisoned against them. I'm sure some are like the last guy you mentioned. but as I said the situation and people involved are allways different.

 

[indo80]

If you aren't having sex at least 3 days a week, with passion, that's not your wife.

might be a cultural thing as in my culture i doubt any guy gets more than two times a week in his late 30's and i come from a culture who has bred a lot <45>

 

[HunterSdVa29]

a lot of women who withhold sex in marriage are internally pretty ok with their spouse cheating as long as it doesnt come back to them

makes sense
also they likely cheated as well, and thus that attitude

 

[Prokofievian]

I wouldnt know how to deal with it. Thats why I don't plan on getting married. The situation is different for everyone, because i know a ton of guys who seperated or divorced and now for a variety of reason have to pay money and don't see their kids/ kids are poisoned against them. I'm sure some are like the last guy you mentioned. but as I said the situation and people involved are allways different.

I'm just saying a necessary condition for the latter guy avoiding the former's fate is daring to cast the die, as Caesar said.

I don't know why, but it seems like dudes are willing to tolerate miserable situations, and may in fact blame and even harbour a deep, preoccupying resentment towards someone else for ending their misery. I don't know why that is.

 

[spamking]

Very weird situation and one I wouldn't want to be a part of . . .

 

[Jimmy Jazz]

I'm just saying a necessary condition for the latter guy avoiding the former's fate is daring to cast the die, as Caesar said.

I don't know why, but it seems like dudes are willing to tolerate miserable situations, and may in fact blame and even harbour a deep, preoccupying resentment towards someone else for ending their misery. I don't know why that is.

its probably a cultural thing. although that first story you mentioned was pretty weird so I guess it can get weird all over.

 

[Amerikuracana]

might be a cultural thing as in my culture i doubt any guy gets more than two times a week in his late 30's and i come from a culture who has bred a lot <45>

I was 36 and she was 50 and we had sex 5 days a week after 14 years.

 

[GtehMVP]

My wife told me I could fuck her if she was passed out drunk.

Yup, my ex told me I could wake her anytime in the middle of the night with my dick inside her. It sounds kinky on paper, but I was pretty uneasy with that. As an abuse victim she had many rape "fantasies". I was a counsellor, that's very unhealthy behaviour, and a turn off, when you know the place it's coming from.

The wife in the OP sounds like a miserable bitch who's banging someone on the side, and the husband is cuck material. Get a god damn divorce already. Reminds me of Walter's bday present.

 

[LMP]

She was prolly cheating on him anyways. Stuff like this is what makes the #metoo shit look so ridiculous. Their are real cases that get overshadowed by the attention seeking whores.

If she didn't want him should have divorced him. Shouldn't have wasted both of their lives for so long. If you are married meet the other persons needs or someone else will.

 

[n...not crazy]

This ain't #metoo

This is severely fucked up people.