Jujitsu advice for my daughter...

Dear parents,

I was going to go on a rant but I’ll give you the USA wrestling research and presentation/course for youth parents and coaches.. listen to it.. pay attention and let the coaches do their job or have the kid quit by ms

Sincerely
Coaches everywhere

 
I'm no parent, but at 6, have fun and make some friends.

If you really want something really technical, some people are just wired that way. I'm in my mid 30s and I'm a slow starter as well. I've tried all sorts of ways to be a bit more aggressive at starts but just can't (least to what I feel is aggressive). I've worked out a few ways to get around it though
 
Maybe BJJ isn't for her. Does she HAVE to do it???
 
JustTheTip said:
But not enough for your tastes?
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No...I'm confident she could do better.

I've decided to reward her financially based on her performance.

$2 for full mount

$3 for taking an opponents back

$5 per submission

1$ dollar bonus for each if it's against a boy
 
DWAYNEAMERICA said:
No...I'm confident she could do better.

I've decided to reward her financially based on her performance.

$2 for full mount

$3 for taking an opponents back

$5 per submission

1$ dollar bonus for each if it's against a boy
Click to expand...
That’ll work out so well in the long run... not. For real, actually educate yourself on mental development and how your kid should be training. I posted videos on the topic and I can find more.

You are making it appear to her that daddy’s love and approval and money depend on how she does.. as well as the fact you are taking 6 year old sports too seriously. It’s clear you are living through your six year old daughter or are trolling. She’s six, number one priority is having fun and developing physical literacy... NOT “being aggressive” Jesus.

I’m aware I should come off less harsh but I truly am sick of dad ball “coaches” taking fucking youth sports too seriously and not actually listening to either black belt coaches or high school or above coaches, former college athletes (I.e. qualified) who have actually accomplished or been at a high level. Let her have fun and encourage her to have good attitude and effort
 
jack36767 said:
That’ll work out so well in the long run... not. For real, actually educate yourself on mental development and how your kid should be training. I posted videos on the topic and I can find more.

You are making it appear to her that daddy’s love and approval and money depend on how she does.. as well as the fact you are taking 6 year old sports too seriously. It’s clear you are living through your six year old daughter or are trolling. She’s six, number one priority is having fun and developing physical literacy... NOT “being aggressive” Jesus.

I’m aware I should come off less harsh but I truly am sick of dad ball “coaches” taking fucking youth sports too seriously and not actually listening to either black belt coaches or high school or above coaches, former college athletes (I.e. qualified) who have actually accomplished or been at a high level. Let her have fun and encourage her to have good attitude and effort
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She loves jujitsu. She has great attitude, has a lot of fun and wants to do well. I'm only rewarding her for working on the holes in her game. Giving someone a "participation medal" and a pat on the back just for "trying" isn't the path to greatness. I don't want a BJ Penn on my hands in the future.
 
DWAYNEAMERICA said:
She loves jujitsu. She has great attitude, has a lot of fun and wants to do well. I'm only rewarding her for working on the holes in her game. Giving someone a "participation medal" and a pat on the back just for "trying" isn't the path to greatness. I don't want a BJ Penn on my hands in the future.
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8/10.
 
DWAYNEAMERICA said:
No...I'm confident she could do better.

I've decided to reward her financially based on her performance.

$2 for full mount

$3 for taking an opponents back

$5 per submission

1$ dollar bonus for each if it's against a boy
Click to expand...
Holy shit. Are you serious? Let her be a child man.
 
DWAYNEAMERICA said:
She loves jujitsu. She has great attitude, has a lot of fun and wants to do well. I'm only rewarding her for working on the holes in her game. Giving someone a "participation medal" and a pat on the back just for "trying" isn't the path to greatness. I don't want a BJ Penn on my hands in the future.
Click to expand...
Did I say just give a participation medal?waiting, waiting.. and no. What I said is that at this stage of her development you don’t need to be taking it so seriously and focus on physical literacy so SHE wants to come back down the road.. what is it about parents thinking that not taking 6 year old stuff so seriously means participation medals... especially when I made the point that actuality qualified coaches who actually have completed or coached at a high level don’t take this age level too seriously..

Answer honestly, what’s your experience coaching, what’s your experience competing in a combat sport high school or above? What’s your knowledge of a child’s mental and physical development?

Because I’ve seen this scenario play out a thousand times and I’m a young coach. And the type of parent, the excuses they make and the “coaching” they do. And the BJ Penn comment confirms you’re definitely living out a dream through your kid
 
jack36767 said:
Did I say just give a participation medal?waiting, waiting.. and no. What I said is that at this stage of her development you don’t need to be taking it so seriously and focus on physical literacy so SHE wants to come back down the road.. what is it about parents thinking that not taking 6 year old stuff so seriously means participation medals... especially when I made the point that actuality qualified coaches who actually have completed or coached at a high level don’t take this age level too seriously..

Answer honestly, what’s your experience coaching, what’s your experience competing in a combat sport high school or above? What’s your knowledge of a child’s mental and physical development?

Because I’ve seen this scenario play out a thousand times and I’m a young coach. And the type of parent, the excuses they make and the “coaching” they do. And the BJ Penn comment confirms you’re definitely living out a dream through your kid
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TLDR

My daughter made over $30 her last class...that will resonate with her far more than any "pep talk".
 
DWAYNEAMERICA said:
If you aren't working towards helping your children become the best that she/he can be...well then you're not a very good parent.
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Oh btw.. relevant to your original question if you haven’t figured it out. I actually have coached youth athletes.. i was a college wrestler and I’m plenty intense and have extremely high standards for my older athletes. I actually do know what I’m talking about.

And btw.. it’s practice rolls you are worrying about. They are irrelevant when it comes to “winning” or losing if no development takes place. When she competes.. and if she loses because of the “issues” you have.. SHE will get more aggressive if she’s upset about the result.. and become self motivated
 
jack36767 said:
Oh btw.. relevant to your original question if you haven’t figured it out. I actually have coached youth athletes.. i was a college wrestler and I’m plenty intense and have extremely high standards for my older athletes. I actually do know what I’m talking about.

And btw.. it’s practice rolls you are worrying about. They are irrelevant when it comes to “winning” or losing if no development takes place. When she competes.. and if she loses because of the “issues” you have.. SHE will get more aggressive if she’s upset about the result.. and become self motivated
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Did you even read my original post?

That's what I'm trying to encourage.
 
DWAYNEAMERICA said:
TLDR

My daughter made over $30 her last class...that will resonate with her far more than any "pep talk".
Click to expand...
Lol
1. can’t actually tell me any coaching experience or competitive experience. Thought so

2. If you want her to be the best she can be.. you need to make her self motivated.. not doing things because she’s bribed., or she’ll lose to kids who start later

3. When the fuck did I talk about pep talks? You didn’t actually read

DWAYNEAMERICA said:
Did you even read my original post?

That's what I'm trying to encourage.
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Once again YOU need to read.. She is SIX as in whether or not she is being aggressive enough or “winning” does NOT FUCKING MATTER right now. In fact she should be spending more time drilling and free play rolling than “competing” and rolling live or being “aggressive”. No this isn’t participation trophy bullshit talk. It’s because the point of practice and sports at this age is not to win.

Now let me explain.. so no confusion.. no I’m not saying give participation trophies.. at all. But it’s possible to have winning and losing without taking it too seriously
 
late to the thread, but as someone who's dated a few gymnasts and cheerleaders, if you push her into competition she's gonna have a ton of injuries and joint problems later in life...
 
RJ Green said:
late to the thread, but as someone who's dated a few gymnasts and cheerleaders, if you push her into competition she's gonna have a ton of injuries and joint problems later in life...
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The playlist I posted earlier talked about it in one of the videos. Over specializing and over competing and taking sports too seriously at a young age,leads to over a 70% dropout rate before middle school, massive injury issues, health problems later and hurts athletic development
 
DWAYNEAMERICA said:
If you aren't working towards helping your child become the best that she/he can be...well then you're not a very good parent.
Click to expand...
You know what. I am working to help my child become the best they can be. I encourage them in school. They work hard at school work and we give them resources to be good students. Jiu Jitsu is always there. My kids participate. It's a hard sport and they work really hard in class and I am happy that they are participating in a sport I love. If they want to compete or not is up to them. I hope they do decide to, but I am not going to pay them to win in class, that's ridiculous.
 
Home school her and move a blackbelt from Brazil into a guest room. She only gets to eat after she does at least 6x6 rounds 1 minute break.
 
DWAYNEAMERICA said:
She loves jujitsu. She has great attitude, has a lot of fun and wants to do well. I'm only rewarding her for working on the holes in her game. Giving someone a "participation medal" and a pat on the back just for "trying" isn't the path to greatness. I don't want a BJ Penn on my hands in the future.
Click to expand...

Yeah. I get the participation medal issue as it is a recurring problem in my country as well.

Kids at school are told that running a race and not winning winning is OK because everyone get a star to participate and you worry that it will make them a no achiever....etc..

It is a hard spot to be as a parent.
 
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