deciphering life, my friend. Deciphering Life.
one thing i've learned throughout all the people i've known, people naively think there are some people out there who've got it all, are happy, at peace and satisfied. In my experience, I've been around rich,poor, inbetween seems everyone is just as miserable to me so i'm trying to figure out what to do myself to not be caught in the money game.
s, I just thought goddamn it I'm equally as chiszzels in the handsomes as this rebar juggernaut, we fucking literarlly juggle three or four girls and they all like him better, it crushed me, we were friends, we showered in highschool, I just didn't get. I'm not an ego guy, and this is my friend, he's just Vince Neil stupid and girls fall back on your four inch dick. I get it, but goddamn it. ....He was a good friend and our rivalry was just as good friend, his dad was golden gloves boxer, tough as fuck, but beat women, I was there when a woman put her face to the screendoor and he, golden gloves, drunk, put his fist through the screen a split her head in half, I was about twelve, no reason. \\\
Shoulda died a long time ago. I had kind of a rival buddy, good friends, the girls always just thought he was the shit, when I was really just the shit, fucking girls never get that. Handsome is for
My buddy and my "rival" made national new. He was stupid and just no smart, I was smart and had the deathwish, lets see if I can find it. The girl I was dating was with him, we were like 15, I couldn't respect the thought of her juggling me and him, not that I'm a big deal, but he didn't get it. If she wanted the bad boy, I got arrested in school drunk fighting cops first period. I couldn't make the biology test, so at 8:15 in Paschke's class. I turn into 17 Marlon Brando. I was done, Karen Kennedy sophomore looks at me and I give her my Paul Newman, and unlock me fifth in a paper bag and gave a deep one, and set it on my desk, she smacks it off and tries putting it in her backpack, but I grab it, and Paschke turns around.
are you okay tom, yes. knockattendance, i'm fucked, I guzzle the bottle and get arrested at 8:50 am. Jail for three days car impounded. Greg Peliah I called for a friend and he brought me to the jail, a fifth of blackberry brandy, which I drank, he gave me another when I got ot out and I drank the whole bottlea and through up on the the stairs and I got arrested again. My defense was this turd kept slicingmytires and I'm too nice and I want to graduate and be left alone. Expelled again, I'm with my girl and all my friends and catch this fuck walking, I jump out of my 70Plymouth while it's rolling and tackle this cunt and it turns out he can scrap, second toughest fight I've ever been in, and I got the jump, he sliced my shit for weeks but he saw me and I barely took him, I punched him unconscious on the sidewalk cement, got back in the car with my gang and my girl, and pulled over and threw up on the road, I looked stupid and ultra aggressive and caught him on the advantage, but he caughtme for weeks, piece of shit. I don't regreat that fight but the ugliness bothers me.
a couple months later he had a .38 to my head at the park, we were gonna fight and every single person in the high school was there.
Shit was epic, my cousin and our biggest guy got into to it and then he came at me and I took him out. I'm not the best but I know how to take care of my shit; So I fucked him up and he -pulled a revolver to my head. I ended u-p okay, my girl, and my friend are both dead. I talked to him two day before, he said Tom, your foot is on firel
And he dies as the dummy
ull
Shoulda died a long time ago. I had kind of a rival buddy, good friends, the girls always just thought he was the shit, when I was really just the shit, fucking girls never get that. Handsome is for
My buddy and my "rival" made national new. He was stupid and just no smart, I was smart and had the deathwish, lets see if I can find it. The girl I was dating was with him, we were like 15, I couldn't respect the thought of her juggling me and him, not that I'm a big deal, but he didn't get it. If she wanted the bad boy, I got arrested in school drunk fighting cops first period. I couldn't make the biology test, so at 8:15 in Paschke's class. I turn into 17 Marlon Brando. I was done, Karen Kennedy sophomore looks at me and I give her my Paul Newman, and unlock me fifth in a paper bag and gave a deep one, and set it on my desk, she smacks it off and tries putting it in her backpack, but I grab it, and Paschke turns around.
are you okay tom, yes. knockattendance, i'm fucked, I guzzle the bottle and get arrested at 8:50 am. Jail for three days car impounded. Greg Peliah I called for a friend and he brought me to the jail, a fifth of blackberry brandy, which I drank, he gave me another when I got ot out and I drank the whole bottlea and through up on the the stairs and I got arrested again. My defense was this turd kept slicingmytires and I'm too nice and I want to graduate and be left alone. Expelled again, I'm with my girl and all my friends and catch this fuck walking, I jump out of my 70Plymouth while it's rolling and tackle this cunt and it turns out he can scrap, second toughest fight I've ever been in, and I got the jump, he sliced my shit for weeks but he saw me and I barely took him, I punched him unconscious on the sidewalk cement, got back in the car with my gang and my girl, and pulled over and threw up on the road, I looked stupid and ultra aggressive and caught him on the advantage, but he caughtme for weeks, piece of shit. I don't regreat that fight but the ugliness bothers me.
a couple months later he had a .38 to my head at the park, we were gonna fight and every single person in the high school was there.
Shit was epic, my cousin and our biggest guy got into to it and then he came at me and I took him out. I'm not the best but I know how to take care of my shit; So I fucked him up and he -pulled a revolver to my head. I ended u-p okay, my girl, and my friend are both dead. I talked to him two day before, he said Tom, your foot is on firel
And he dies as the dummy
ull
Yup everyone's got problems, some worse than others but we've all got em, that's for sure. We're all just wading through shit trying to land on a nice piece of solid ground and make the best of it. I don't think true happiness comes around as much as most ppl think, we gotta stop and smell the roses when we do find it.
I don't always understand it, i just know what i see, what people feel is abstract and subjective i guess but i watch what people do. the rich people i've known or the better off people i've known are as stressed and as miserable as anyone. I'm talking people you look at and go "why the fuck are you unhappy?".
I think a lot of the time, the work you put into the process of making all that money causes a lot of the stress that you end up getting as an effect of that monetary gain. The most successful ppl I know from a financial perspective, 90% of their life revolves around their job. And when they have that money, they need to keep it, b/c their lifestyle necessitates they that keep working that often, that hard.
that's a lot of it, my theory (really don't know) is that some of the rich people have all that money and it leaves them with too much time on their hands for the negative inside to fester. and to learn that even all this crap doesn't bring happiness. But yes, the money, keeping it coming, dealing with all that it takes to keep it coming that they don't even realize is making them miserable (traffic,crowding,bad food,drugs,alcohol etc..,) and on top of it, trying to make relationships work, it's daunting, i honestly feel badly for some of these people because they turn on each other (and on me too sometimes).
could be that too, alone time is good to an extent, but too much of it can leave you in your own head too often. It's interesting, humans are so similar but also so different. One man's trash is another man's treasure. Being rich is enough for some, being poor you can be just as happy. Most of us sit somewhere in between, trying to figure it all out just like the shanty and mansion dwellers do, I guess.
