Is there a cognitive dissonance when people say having kids is so great?

[Deleted member 409801]

This. People will always justify their past decisions and never admit to having made a mistake.

True , and the only people that do that are the ones that have had children. The forever alones would never dream of engaging in such choice justification.

" Gee , I really would like to meet a nice person and build a nice family, but if we are being honest here , I struggle with attracting high quality mates and maintaining healthy relationships"

I see that literally all the time on here!

Everybody ( as a group) does the shit to some degree, so you're barking up the wrong tree. I realize you're doing so by design because the resultant circle jerk is oh so pleasing to the pre frontal cortex........but still, be aware .

 

[Adamant]

It seems like 99% of the time it makes people fat, tired, stupid, and, broke.

Contrast this with being single with no kids, having money, taking care of yourself, having friends, a social life, access to tons of girls, and freedom.

I'm not knocking parents, but when they try to tell me I'm missing out while they're in the middle of passing out from exhaustion and always seem to be broke, I'm obviously skeptical.

For example this guy at work is very overweight, lives on fast food because it's convinient, and is a self proclaimed gamer yet can never even afford a game when it comes out. He asks me when I'm gonna have kids and says I'm missing out. If this shit is what happens, then fuck that.

I think it comes to being legitimately ready and prepared for kids. When you are, it's a wonderful thing. When you're not, it's awful.

 

[Pixelated Porn]

You are dead either way. Why does it matter?

What if you have a kid but they die? Is your life a failure?

What if further down the family tree it ends? Does that retroactively make you and all your dead descendants a failure?

Not sure if serious, but if you believe Darwin at all, that our most basic biological imperative is to reproduce. Survival of the fittest. If you don't have offspring then you are the weak and your genes should die the fuck out.

 

[Tankeray]

Not sure if serious, but if you believe Darwin at all, that our most basic biological imperative is to reproduce. Survival of the fittest. If you don't have offspring then you are the weak and your genes should die the fuck out.

Lol nice

The pro kids crowd wants us dead, watch out!!

 

[Halifax]

It seems like 99% of the time it makes people fat, tired, stupid, and, broke.

Contrast this with being single with no kids, having money, taking care of yourself, having friends, a social life, access to tons of girls, and freedom.

I'm not knocking parents, but when they try to tell me I'm missing out while they're in the middle of passing out from exhaustion and always seem to be broke, I'm obviously skeptical.

For example this guy at work is very overweight, lives on fast food because it's convinient, and is a self proclaimed gamer yet can never even afford a game when it comes out. He asks me when I'm gonna have kids and says I'm missing out. If this shit is what happens, then fuck that.

Are your friends all lower income families?

 

[Darwinambrosius]

Not sure if serious, but if you believe Darwin at all, that our most basic biological imperative is to reproduce. Survival of the fittest. If you don't have offspring then you are the weak and your genes should die the fuck out.

How much of Darwin's work have you read?

 

[Rav1nHunter]

I've seen a few kids vs no kids threads here and from what I get from a lot of the pro-kid people is that:

1. The meaning of life is to have kids. The go-to question people ponder and who knew pro-kid people knew the answer all along

2. They have some sort of legacy that's so important, they need a child to carry it on. Very humble outlook on life

3. They need someone to take care of them when they are old, lonely and decrepit. Very selfless outlook on life

4. You don't know the absolute joy it is to have a kid unless you have one. You know, us humans are so simple, we cannot understand something without experiencing it.

People who don't want kids are just too young and immature and one day they will suddenly want a child, guaranteed.

I have kids but I agree with most of your post.
My pro's and cons
Pro's
It's fun teaching little versions of myself.
Watching them play and enjoy sport lets me live vicariously through them.
They get me beers so I don't have to get up.
I gives my wife something to do.

Cons
They always want what's mine.
Holidays take more planning and cost more.
Saturday morning sports (not fun with hangover)
Helping with homework
Feeding them even when I'm not hungry.
Baby fucks up my sleep all the time.

 

[Rav1nHunter]

You're only saying that because you're young. When you're older, you'll want kids.

And you don't know it sucks because unless you're a parent, you can NEVER understand what it's like to have kids...

...oh wait

To be fair the dude had a kid at 17 that's got to suck big time losing all you late teens early 20s to parenting.
If I had a kids that young I would be miserable as well.

 

[blaseblah]

Not sure if serious, but if you believe Darwin at all, that our most basic biological imperative is to reproduce. Survival of the fittest. If you don't have offspring then you are the weak and your genes should die the fuck out.

How is Darwinism relevant to a society that actively protects it weakest members?

Also that's not even how the theory works. The idea is that the weaker members won't survive long enough to have offspring, while the strong will. You're putting the cart before the horse.

 

[Pixelated Porn]

How is Darwinism relevant to a society that actively protects it weakest members?
.

The alpha males in say wolves actually protect the weak too. The weak bow down to the strong, and while they do not get to impregnates a bitch, they are not all alone in the cold, but be sure the top is mating.

I see you are at least not in loser denial.

How much of Darwin's work have you read?

You obviously do not even know who the fuck Darwin is. At that point it is not even the best genes are going to get propagated, it is that those who do not even mate are not even in the fucking game.

learn science before posting.

 

[Darwinambrosius]

The alpha males in say wolves actually protect the weak too. The weak bow down to the strong, and while they do not get to impregnates a bitch, they are not all alone in the cold, but be sure the top is mating.

I see you are at least not in loser denial.




You obviously do not even know who the fuck Darwin is. At that point it is not even the best genes are going to get propagated, it is that those who do not even mate are not even in the fucking game.

learn science before posting.

I don't even see what that has to do with my question. Why are you so outraged?

 

[Horse Style]

I don't even see what that has to do with my question. Why are you so outraged?

Don't waste your time. Many posters here know from experience that @Pixelated Porn is borderline retarded

 

[Darwinambrosius]

Don't waste your time. Many posters here know from experience that @Pixelated Porn is borderline retarded

Good looking out m8

 

[Pixelated Porn]

Don't waste your time. Many posters here know from experience that @Pixelated Porn is borderline retarded

So you are not going to argue my point but just cry like a little butthurt? Fuck off.

I don't even see what that has to do with my question. Why are you so outraged?

You don't know what it has to do with darwin??? You don't know what survival of the fittest has to do with Darwin???

Ok got it. You don't know shit.

 

[Horse Style]

So you are not going to argue my point but just cry like a little butthurt? Fuck off.



You don't know what it has to do with darwin??? You don't know what survival of the fittest has to do with Darwin???

Ok got it. You don't know shit.

Look, everyone. The little guy thinks he knows something

 

[blaseblah]

The alpha males in say wolves actually protect the weak too. The weak bow down to the strong, and while they do not get to impregnates a bitch, they are not all alone in the cold, but be sure the top is mating.

I see you are at least not in loser denial.

Actually there is only one alpha male in a wolf pack. And it only mates with the alpha female. Monogamous motherfuckers.

The male wolves who can't find a female (aka the weaker wolves) don't just sit around jerking off, they go and find free females from other packs to have sex with. They aren't monogamous though, they fuck em and flee. These weaker wolves are the deadbeat daddies of the animal kingdom.

None of this shit has to do with humans though. We aren't living in nature, we aren't exposed to any of the dangers that would make "survival of the fittest" relevant. It doesn't matter how strong you are.

 

[KenstaBoy]

Interesting how some people are saying if you're financially stable and you have children at the right age, you'll be much happier with them. I see plenty of financially stable parents who had their first children in their 30's and still have a look of resentment. But they would never dare say such a thing, their reactions to their children are not congruent to the way they describe being a parent with words like "rewarding" and phrases like "an experience that everyone should have the pleasure to have". Well, guess what? I hear that same mumbo jumbo from the 17 year old girl who just had her first child and is collecting food stamps and is looking for a server job at some mom and pop joint that is willing to pay her under the table. In either situation all I think is "That sucks". No matter how much they feed me this positive stuff, I simply don't buy it. Once in a blue moon I feel like I meet a very happy parent and I feel like it mostly has to do with their already easy-going nature. I just don't see it as a genuine response from others. Even the ones that complain about children all the time say stupid shit like "That little angel saved my life". Suuuuure, she did, buddy. I just wish people were more honest about this stuff. It's okay to love your child and be a wonderful parent, while still hating the process. I feel it's the case for most people, but it's such a chop on their ego to admit such a thing. To actually admit the living thing that you created was a mistake is a tough pill to swallow, and that's fine, but quit force-feeding us all this horeshit about how great it is to be a parent.

 

[steve38]

No offense, but I think most of you younger guys that have decided against kids really don't have enough life experience to know WHAT you want, and things are likely to change for you at some point in the future. And that's ok.

But the older guys who are still confirmed in their anti-parenthood views are the real irony. They're self-aware, introspective, and likely very intelligent...and would probably make great parents, or at least have high quality genes to pass on.

Oh well, the world will keep getting dumber.

 

[Dana_is_your_GOD]

I'm not going to lie, that shit made me feel 10 feet tall.

Manlet detected.

 

[KenstaBoy]

No offense, but I think most of you younger guys that have decided against kids really don't have enough life experience to know WHAT you want, and things are likely to change for you at some point in the future. And that's ok.

But the older guys who are still confirmed in their anti-parenthood views are the real irony. They're self-aware, introspective, and likely very intelligent...and would probably make great parents, or at least have high quality genes to pass on.

Oh well, the world will keep getting dumber.

This is a fair statement.