I Met Brendan Schaub...

James Baller said:
Travie Browne is looking right in your direction too... and he looks angry...

Seems legit. <seedat>
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You can clearly see her trying to explain the situation.

Basically I fill out the banana hammock a little more.
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It was a warm summer night in the year 2015. I was working nights as a police dispatcher, and my schedule was all out of whack. 6pm to 6am was my regular shift, so my nights off were often quiet, sometimes lonely, and occasionally weird. This is one of those stories. Now, 24-Hour Fitness was the perfect gym for my schedule, and 3am was my go-to workout time. And although the 24-Fitness Sport in Santa Monica, CA is certainly the busiest gym I've ever seen, it was normally as empty as the streets at 3am. On this particular night, however, I wasn't alone.

I turned up, signed in, threw my bag in a locker, stretched the quads a bit, and hopped on the treadmill. And that's when I saw him... In all his pale glory, the man himself, Brendan Schaub. My first two thoughts: Oh my God, that's Brendan Schaub ! Followed by, Why the fuck is he so pale? I swear the dude was practically transparent. He looked sickly. But he was being led around by a personal trainer, so I figured he was on the mend.

Well, the novelty of seeing Brendan Schaub in public wore off quickly so I just went to finish my workout, ignoring him. I had about 8-10 lifts on this particular day, so I finished my usual circuit around the gym. (Now I want to preface this next part by saying that at this time I was in the best shape of my life. I may be a fat bastard now, but not back then; I was training for the police academy, and I was ripped.) Well, as I complete my workout, I notice that Brendan Schaub is following me around the gym. I mean, every time I use a machine, Brendan Schaub uses it next. There must be 200 pieces of equipment in the room, but every time I finish with a machine, Brendan Schaub and his trainer use it next. Not once. Not twice. But over and over and over again. It was really weird. I mean, I had to imagine that the personal trainer was directing the workout, and not The Hybrid himself, so why the correlation? I just imagined that since I was doing common lifts, my workout was probably similar to the one prescribed by the trainer. But somewhere in the back of my mind, I started to feel like I was being cruised. So this goes on for about 45 minutes, and then I hit the treadmill to run a few more miles. Brendan Schaub and his trainer disappear. I figured that was that.

The gym was quiet again. I finished my run and then headed toward the showers. Now, the gym floor was empty, and the locker room was empty, so I figured that, except for employees, there was no one around. Brendan Schaub must have finished his work out and went home, right? No....

At this gym, directly across from the showers is the sauna room. And at the front of the sauna is a huge glass window, and it looks directly out into the shower room. Well, when I round the corner from the hallway into the showers, I look back over my shoulder, and I can see Brendan Schaub in the sauna room leaning up against the glass window. It's a large room, and he's in the only spot that has a direct view of the locker room hallway and the showers. He is sprawled out, laying across the bench and his towel is loosely draped over his body.

Okaaaaay, I think. I head to my usual spot (last shower on the right), and immediately Brendan Schaub leaves the sauna, sans towel, and starts showering as well. The thing is, he's showering, but he's also staring right at me. And he has half an erection. (I'll save you the suspense, it was fucking enormous! Like a horse.) I'm thinking, is this really happening? Is Brendan Schaub half-wanking at me?? Well, to make a long story short I started to get pretty uncomfortable, so I grabbed my towel and walked out. As I passed him, he turned to face me, holding his cock. I just ignored him and walked away, laughing to myself.

I told my roommate at the time; he laughed at the story, but he was a little skeptical on the details. Then I swear to God, not one week later, my roommate elbows me in the checkout-line at the market: "Look!" It's a National Enquirer. The cover story? "Brendan Schaub hit on me in the shower!"
 
Cclick said:
I saw Schaub at a grocery store in Las Vegas once. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
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I see you Layne Norton.
 
I always saw schaub having Sherdog accounts to make these silly threads about him in order to stay relevant as a possibility. Now I am convinced.
 
KRkYWefD6UQ.jpg

Filthymaggot said:
I met Travis Browne at a restaurant. Rhonda had just blown me in the bathroom while my wife celebrated our daughters birthday.
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scurdhomey said:
I recently had the privilege to meet Brendan Schaub.

I really don't know much about him, but he seemed like a very down to Earth guy. We had a long conversation and it was pretty obvious that he is intelligent. Pretty sure he is well read. I was impressed.

He seems like a happy, worry free guy. He was with his girlfriend who was beautiful beyond belief.

He has potential to be a good role model and my meeting with him was inspiring.
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You must have met Brendan Fraser.
 
cheesus said:
It was a warm summer night in the year 2015. I was working nights as a police dispatcher, and my schedule was all out of whack. 6pm to 6am was my regular shift, so my nights off were often quiet, sometimes lonely, and occasionally weird. This is one of those stories. Now, 24-Hour Fitness was the perfect gym for my schedule, and 3am was my go-to workout time. And although the 24-Fitness Sport in Santa Monica, CA is certainly the busiest gym I've ever seen, it was normally as empty as the streets at 3am. On this particular night, however, I wasn't alone.

I turned up, signed in, threw my bag in a locker, stretched the quads a bit, and hopped on the treadmill. And that's when I saw him... In all his pale glory, the man himself, Brendan Schaub. My first two thoughts: Oh my God, that's Brendan Schaub ! Followed by, Why the fuck is he so pale? I swear the dude was practically transparent. He looked sickly. But he was being led around by a personal trainer, so I figured he was on the mend.

Well, the novelty of seeing Brendan Schaub in public wore off quickly so I just went to finish my workout, ignoring him. I had about 8-10 lifts on this particular day, so I finished my usual circuit around the gym. (Now I want to preface this next part by saying that at this time I was in the best shape of my life. I may be a fat bastard now, but not back then; I was training for the police academy, and I was ripped.) Well, as I complete my workout, I notice that Brendan Schaub is following me around the gym. I mean, every time I use a machine, Brendan Schaub uses it next. There must be 200 pieces of equipment in the room, but every time I finish with a machine, Brendan Schaub and his trainer use it next. Not once. Not twice. But over and over and over again. It was really weird. I mean, I had to imagine that the personal trainer was directing the workout, and not The Hybrid himself, so why the correlation? I just imagined that since I was doing common lifts, my workout was probably similar to the one prescribed by the trainer. But somewhere in the back of my mind, I started to feel like I was being cruised. So this goes on for about 45 minutes, and then I hit the treadmill to run a few more miles. Brendan Schaub and his trainer disappear. I figured that was that.

The gym was quiet again. I finished my run and then headed toward the showers. Now, the gym floor was empty, and the locker room was empty, so I figured that, except for employees, there was no one around. Brendan Schaub must have finished his work out and went home, right? No....

At this gym, directly across from the showers is the sauna room. And at the front of the sauna is a huge glass window, and it looks directly out into the shower room. Well, when I round the corner from the hallway into the showers, I look back over my shoulder, and I can see Brendan Schaub in the sauna room leaning up against the glass window. It's a large room, and he's in the only spot that has a direct view of the locker room hallway and the showers. He is sprawled out, laying across the bench and his towel is loosely draped over his body.

Okaaaaay, I think. I head to my usual spot (last shower on the right), and immediately Brendan Schaub leaves the sauna, sans towel, and starts showering as well. The thing is, he's showering, but he's also staring right at me. And he has half an erection. (I'll save you the suspense, it was fucking enormous! Like a horse.) I'm thinking, is this really happening? Is Brendan Schaub half-wanking at me?? Well, to make a long story short I started to get pretty uncomfortable, so I grabbed my towel and walked out. As I passed him, he turned to face me, holding his cock. I just ignored him and walked away, laughing to myself.

I told my roommate at the time; he laughed at the story, but he was a little skeptical on the details. Then I swear to God, not one week later, my roommate elbows me in the checkout-line at the market: "Look!" It's a National Enquirer. The cover story? "Brendan Schaub hit on me in the shower!"
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abr.gif
 
Brendan the type of guy to go on Showtime press tour to defend Conor and come back as Floyd's biggest fan.

Brendan the type of guy to send d*ck pics to himself.

Brendan is the type of guy who smacks his own ass while fu*king a chick.

Brendan is the type of guy to miss the prelims because he's still "putting his outfit together."

Brendan is the type of guy to walk into a gay bar by mistake and end up staying all night.

Brendan the type of guy to pretend to be asleep when his girlfriend wants to fu*k.

Brendan the type of guy to get caught peeping at your junk in the locker room and continues looking.

Brendan the type of dude to ask his girl if his 'ass looks fat in these jeans'.
 
All these comments are reminding me about the time I was on an ice fishing trip in Alaska with my pa and uncle. We were just sitting there one day shooting shit over the open hole waiting for a fish to pull at the line. It was overcast but surprisingly warm for mid February. Around noon, right after me and my pa and uncle lit up some fresh stogies my uncle had smuggled from Cuba -- see, this was before the embargo was lifted -- we saw two figures running, and I mean running, from the distance. We had snowmobiles you see, took us a good while to get from camp to out on the lake where we were fishing, but these dudes, they was just hauling ass across the ice, no snowmobile, just a bunch of gear and two sweaty brows. When they reached us, to my damn surprise it was none other than "Big Brown" Brendan Schaub himself and Bryan Callen, his hype man aka Beta male bro.

My pa and uncle reached for they guns at first but I recognized Big Brown right away, so I said Pa it's alright, I know them. You know em? The fuck? my pa said, to which I said Yessuh, this is Big Brown Brendan Schaub himself, former UFC fighter and Ronda Rousey. And that's Bryan Callen, his cock holster.

My paw and uncle didn't look none to impressed but after a moment they put them guns away and kept on jawing bout this and that. I turned to Big Brown and said Man what are you doing out here?

I'm here with Bryan Callen, he said, to which Bryan raised a hand up and waved. He was hunched over trying to catch his breath. See, despite him being a great deal smaller than Big Brown, it looked like he was carrying most of the gear, most of which looked like recording equipment -- a shoulder-mounted video camera, tripod, and a bunch of other shit I didn't recognize.

We're here to prove to Eddie Bravo that the world is round, Big Brown said. Uh, what? was all I could muster. You heard me right, Big Brown said. We're going to run across the North Pole. We started in Anchorage, and we're gonna film the whole trip all the way to Greenland.

Hang on, I said, So you're gonna film yourselves walking across-

Na bro, running,. Big Brown said, interrupting me, I'm gonna fuckin run across the North Pole son, all day every day. Bryan repeated All day everyday, still hunched over gasping for air.

You realize, I began, That even if you do that, Eddie is just gonna say you walked along the edge, not over the top, right?

Big Brown stood still for a moment, his eyes blinking emptily. During this time Bryan stood up straight having finally caught his breath. After a solid moment Big Brown yelled Fuck and stormed off in the other direction, back whence he came. Bryan looked at me for a moment and muttered Told him this was a dumb idea before he turned around himself and followed his Big Brown. I went back over to my stool next to the hole in the ice and sat down. We didn't catch any fish that day, but I got to meet Brendan Schaub.


Oh, and I saw Steve Carrel in a Lowes once, and sat across Edge in an airport. That was cool.
 
scurdhomey said:
I recently had the privilege to meet Brendan Schaub.

I really don't know much about him, but he seemed like a very down to Earth guy. We had a long conversation and it was pretty obvious that he is intelligent. Pretty sure he is well read. I was impressed.

He seems like a happy, worry free guy. He was with his girlfriend who was beautiful beyond belief.

He has potential to be a good role model and my meeting with him was inspiring.
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I'm meet Jimmy Hendricks yesterday.
 
s-683965b605c6c9c952318b4d16cd550274ae429c.gif

Two years ago I was on a dinner cruise when who appears out of the blue...Brenda Schaub and Joe Rogan. I pretended not to notice them. 45 minutes later I'm on deck taking in view when I hear moaning...

I walk towards moans to see Rogan dewing Schaub in the butt. Schaub was like "pull out I hear someone cumming".

I backflipped the frick out of there. It's the truth...everyone knows so.
 
TS, point out on the doll where Schaub touched you.
 
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