Thanks for the support, everyone
I enjoy the sport a lot. Especially sparring. Gives me an adrenaline bump and energy in the morning with which I feel damn fresh and ready for challenges.
I am a very competitive person. So not comparing myself to others is very, very hard. This is my drive - to be better than the rest and has always been my drive. I ve done it in soccer, I ve done it in esports (yep I was also a nerd at some point).
Comparing to myself is hard. I really try to feel comfortable when practicing. I mean I am comfortable with my combos, I am comfortable on the pads and etc. I d say I have a decent technique, but when it comes to put it together in a fight I suddenly suck.
For comparison I had the same feeling when I was learning to dribble in soccer. On non moving cons I could dribble freaking awesome, but once there is an opponent ... things get nasty. After 15 years break from soccer now I am an amateur player and I have no problem dribling past opponents, but I struggled greatly 15 years ago in my youth years. It is the same feeling right now with sparring and implementing technique I have practiced shadow boxing, working on the bag or the pads.
What I focus on when I spar? This is a good question. My main focus is questioning myself if I am on the right position or distance to try named combo, so I do not get countered easily. Or how do I defend, where I am on the ring and etc. But most importantly I hesitate. I always question.
That has its positives though. Today I was able to see a spar partner that he likes slipping inside and go to his left while comming up with a jab or uppercut. So I tried just to tripple jab going to my left too and surround him from the left side which put him on defence for most of the round as he did not expect me doing so many jabs going that way and seting up my right hand in that way. But mostly it brings negatives... my hesitation.
I mean I can do well in spar, but I have to try freaking hard and give 120 % of myself. I do best when I pressure, cut angles, use that freaking jab like a lot, being active and I mean way more active than my opponents. But if I take a slack I get my ass handled. The second I think about relaxing and taking a breather I start being beaten. If I am acting and hustling I do well. If I decide to relax I get ass handled.
I do boxing for many reasons. But my highest motivation few years ago to start with the fight sports was to learn to fight. I was like "hey, I am going to be a father in a near future, I need to learn to defend family". But right now I enjoy the sport a lot. It really helps my mood, helps get rid of frustration and anger and etc. And yep it worked wonders with my confidence, especially in soccer.
Now I have tried to think why. Why do I suck in sparring? And it is mostly hesitation. Sometimes it happens I let my hands go and I do well, but it is rare cases. I am actually not afraid to get hit right now. I eat shots like a champ. It is the frustration of not being able to put up a fight and let these hands go. I would like to counter, I would like to in fight, I would like to throw longer combos and get out of this 1-1-2 or similar combinations to which I reffer almost 80% of the time.
I have a partial solution not sure if will help. I have decided to put up some time on adding slips, ducks after my combinations and comming up with further combinations. To drill them up like a lot. For example 1-2, duck under, 2-3, weave body hook or upper-2 and etc. To work a bit on some kind of a flow. Or 1-2, slip out 2-3, or 1-2 side step 3-2 and etc. To get damn body used to do more and be flowing. Not sure where this journey will take me though.
