How the f**k do you make friends as an adult

BJJ and martial arts in general are how I've met new people.

Concerts, places I frequent (usually it is gals I end up being friends with (sometimes more)).
 
I feel your pain. I get forced to hang out with my girls friends boyfriend's while the girls do stuff together. They're all a bunch of 115lb hipsters. I tried to teach one to shoot a bow the other day and he couldn't even draw it. So I said ok let's go drink and he wouldn't because apparently the beer I had wasn't vegan. These are pretty much the only guys I meet nowadays

Shoot a bow?
Your just as bad as him but on the opposite angle.

Pick up a fucking baseball and have a catch. The hell is a matter with you.
Fuckin bow.....ridiculous.

Shoot an arrow? Is that what you want me to say? Is shoot a gun ok?

Lmao this has to be the best exchange that's happened on here this weekend.
 
The real question is why would you want to? I barely have enough time for my friends, and lord knows I don't want to make new ones.

All joking aside, I think it is enormously challenging to make new friends as an adult - 80% of my friends I have known since high school (I'm now 33 years old), and the others I made at the gym.

I know you said that you your current gym is made up of locals who already know each other, but if your training at the same time every day, you will inevitably get to know people. The progression of friendship starts with the head nod, moves to "Can I work in/catch a spot", and ultimately ends in "Do you know where I can score steroids". Ok, maybe that last one was specific to my experience, but you get the idea. Some of my best friends I met while training, and what's really cool is that they come from all walks of life that I would have never met otherwise.

I also know people who have used sites like "MeetupToronto" where the entire idea is to meet new people/network. I haven't personally done that, but when my ex GF was new to the city, she said that was a cool way to meet people who are also seeking to expand their social circle (with no romantic motives).

Good luck bro.
 
I also know people who have used sites like "MeetupToronto" where the entire idea is to meet new people/network. I haven't personally done that, but when my ex GF was new to the city, she said that was a cool way to meet people who are also seeking to expand their social circle (with no romantic motives).

Good luck bro.

Meetup is brutal in my experience. Two minutes there and you quickly realize why the attendees have no friends and why it should probably stay that way.

There are exceptions though, since after attending one regularly for two years I did end up meeting one of my closest current friends.

Sports >
 
Airport bathrooms and trucker stops
 
The real question is why would you want to? I barely have enough time for my friends, and lord knows I don't want to make new ones.

All joking aside, I think it is enormously challenging to make new friends as an adult - 80% of my friends I have known since high school (I'm now 33 years old), and the others I made at the gym.

I seem to unique there that I'm not intouch with anyone I went to school or uni with, don't have a big circle of friends but there pretty much all people I'v worked with.
 
Don't shit on me too hard.. legit asking advice

I was an athlete in college didn't know what to do when it was all over. I thought grad assistant would be a good idea, but coaching positions are scarce. I find myself in Kansas City (not a big city, but big for me) and the only people i know are married.

I workout everyday but I'm in an area that seems to be made up of townies that all know each other..

My work colleagues are either incredibly older or are a little older and are too goal driven to connect with
I visit my cousins in Kansas city, dude, place is full of lames. It's gonna be harder there. Just go to places that sound fun to you and meet like minded people.
 
I visit my cousins in Kansas city, dude, place is full of lames. It's gonna be harder there. Just go to places that sound fun to you and meet like minded people.
Do your cousins live in Kansas City, Kansas?
 
I'm not exactly sure, and go easy on me for saying this, but I honestly believe that the faith (religion) of southerners has a lot to do with their hospitality and general friendliness.

People in the South are just proud to help others, it's so different everywhere else.
Interesting. I guess by faith/religion you mean various strands of Christianity? I can see how Christianity practiced with sincerity could go a long way to explain a kind, humanistic disposition but it can't be the whole explanation...? I mean, there are Christians everywhere in the Western world, including a lot of not so friendly ones. We have some die-hard Christian countries here in Europe, where people are...whatever is the opposite of warm, friendly and helpful.

I always figured it was the Southern accents - they are so great they just put you in a good mood and makes you want to be kind :p
The South does sound great though - maybe TS should move there instead of Kansas.
 
Meetup.com and find a group you like. People there are usually people who just moved into town and don't know anybody either.
 
You don't.

/thread

No but for real... People get expectations from shows like Friends and all of those other shows where guys go to a bar with their group of middle aged men with one Cleveland Brown-esque black guy and that is so far from reality.

Most of the people you hang with will be co-workers or your family (or your wife's family). Unless of course you do activities, then you'll have activity friends. If you are lucky enough to have lived the same place your entire life (like most of the population), you will probably keep your school friends, unless of course, they relocate.
 
I might get flamed for this, but friendship in adulthood is very much tied to employment. You tend to hang out with the people you work with. When you change job, you mostly stop socializing with the people at the old work place. Another way is through hobby you enjoy, where like minded people will befriend each other.

Realistically, the people you tend to be friends with for life are those that you met in high school or university. The problem is that friends from high school or university tend to relocate once they graduate to pursue their own lives. People come and go, and it's just a fact of life.
 
I might get flamed for this, but friendship in adulthood is very much tied to employment. You tend to hang out with the people you work with. When you change job, you mostly stop socializing with the people at the old work place.

It was always like this though. As a kid, your friends were people you went to school with.
 
It was always like this though. As a kid, your friends were people you went to school with.
Yep, my best friend in elementary school and I mostly stopped hanging out after we got assigned to different high schools. We have each other on facebook to this day and I think I have his contact somewhere, but we do not socialize at all. I bumped into him a few times in the years that have gone, and all we said was essentially "Hi. How are you? Bye".
 
You post on sherdog in the mayberry, my friend!

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