Since some of you grumpy people need humor, here you go. Kyle Maynard goes into a bar and the bartender says, "You need to get out of here. You obviously can't hold your liquor." Jon Jones gets pulled over in his Bentley by a cop, and the cop sees a bottle on the seat. The cop asks Jones what's in the bottle, and Jones replies, "It's only water officer!" The cop takes the bottle, smells it, and says, "Son, this this smells like wine to me." Bonesy says, "Praise the Lord, he's done it again!" Bigfoot goes into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Why are GSP, Shogun, and Joanna Jedrzejczyk against a fighters union? Because strikes make them tap. Mike Perry goes into a bar and the bartender says, "You know, we don't see too many goats in here." Connor replies, "At these prices, you're not going to see many more." Stefan Struve walks into a bar and says, "Heyyy everybody, high balls are on me!" Mighty Mouse goes into a bar and manages to climb on the stool. He orders a shot, and the bartender says, "That'll be tree fiddy." Mighty Mouse says, "Sorry, I'm a little short." GSP is at a gas station when a flying saucer pulls up to the pump next to him. A little alien climbs out and starts filling up. Georges notices that the flying sauces has "UFO" printed on the side, so he says to the alien, "I am imprezzed with your flying saucer. Is the 'UFO' for unidentified flying object?" The alien says, "No, stupid. It's means unleaded fuel only" Matt Hamill goes into a bar....and gets hammered. Chuck Liddell goes into a bar and the bartender throws him out for being too drunk. A little while later he goes back in and gets thrown out again. A little while later he goes in a third time and says to the bartender, "Geez, how many bars do you work at?" Ronda Rousey tells Cecil Peoples, "I'm dating a Brazilian." Cecil says, "Are you serious??? How many is a brazilian? Mark Coleman goes into a bar...and gets hammered too. Mighty Mouse walks into a mini bar.... Alistair Overeem walks into a bar....and wakes up about ten minutes later. Artem Lobov goes into a bar.... ...and gets hammered.