Feel like a douche after sub?

Discussion in 'Grappling Technique' started by Armchair Ninja, Feb 15, 2017.

  1. Armchair Ninja

    Armchair Ninja Orange Belt

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    Just started three months ago. I've been browsing old stuff about etiquette trying to fit in. Haven't had much guidance really at the gym. We are all beginners in my class but we do some randori at the end of classes. Usually it starts closed guard and goes to sweep or pass but the instructor added submission last night. I was paired with a guy who was even newer than I am and he fell straight into a triangle. I mean he really gave it to me. It was my first submission and I'm not good enough to set much up on my own. Been feeling kind of bad about it since but I don't know why. I guess because he is a little newer than I am. I guess just trying to understand how things should go and if I should have passed it up or if it's proper to take it? Trying not to be a white belt spaz.
     
  2. EGDM

    EGDM Blue Belt

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    Tapping people less experienced than you is how you practice submissions. You aren't going to submit a lot of people better than you, by definition.
     
  3. Rod1

    Rod1 Titanium Belt

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    Being a douche is a problem of attitude not actions.
     
  4. TheMood

    TheMood Blue Belt

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    I'm going to answer assuming you're not a troll.

    Did you let go when he tapped? Did you not say anything after he tapped? Did you continue to train after he tapped? If you answered yes to all three of those questions then it was completely fine. A triangle is a basic and effective submission. You are most likely only going to submit people newer than you for awhile. This is normal.
     
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  5. INTERL0PER

    INTERL0PER Brown Belt

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    Submitting people is the entire point of jiu jitsu. Being submitted is also one of the major aspects of training.

    You need to get used to submitting people, noobs included. Just as you need to get used to being submitted yourself.
     
  6. Armchair Ninja

    Armchair Ninja Orange Belt

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    Yes let go immediately. Did not say anything to each other and moved on to other partners. Basically the way the instructor does it, 4 or 5 pairs on the mat. Loser gets in back of the line, winner stays gets next in line.
     
  7. Nnedd

    Nnedd Centaur Booty Belt

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    Congrats
     
  8. ArtemV

    ArtemV Silver Belt

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    Go easier and focus on techniques you learned/want to try vs the lower ranks/newer grapplers. Have fun, try and focus and make yourself struggle with higher belts and ranks, it is the learning process. They will get better, as will you.
     
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  9. Xuh

    Xuh Black Belt

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    I understand. After all, you simulated killing that helpless, defenceless newbie, bro. You're practically a murderer now. Might as well embrace it (and in real life, too).
     
  10. Daniel Fox

    Daniel Fox Green Belt

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    He was trying to do the same thing to you, no need to feel guilty.
     
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  11. rmongler

    rmongler Brown Belt

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    That feeling is just the false consciousness of the untermensch trying to get you to willingly disenfranchise yourself through Sklavenmoral.
     
  12. Minnja

    Minnja Touch-Butt white belt Platinum Member

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    This. It's pretty much the only times I get subs that aren't the RNC or ezekial. The day I legitimately finish an armbar or triangle on someone near my skill level I will cry tears of joy and run around the mats celebrating like won Mundials
     
  13. BJJ_Rage

    BJJ_Rage Gold Belt

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    why on fucking earth would you feel bad about it?

    it seems you are seeing this as a proud thing, theres no shame on being subed, you are supposed to get subed lmfao...
     
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  14. RJ Green

    RJ Green Black Belt

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    dude unless it's like a pure windpipe choke or something you cranked don't feel bad. they can always tap.

    i mean, it's a contact sport. we signed a waiver. you know what you're getting into.
     
  15. Gandhi

    Gandhi War Room Deep State Platinum Member

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    Like the part about continuing to train.

    One guy I used to roll with and tap me all the time noticed I had been training more so he had been avoiding me (so he said when I asked him to spar). He catches me in a triangle and then I say, nice lets go again, he then says, naw I'm good. Like he had his win and wanted to go home with it. What a douche.
     
  16. SummerStriker

    SummerStriker Black Belt

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    If you understand that rolling in the gym is less like shooting free throws and more like a pickup game of basket ball, you'd understand more why people don't like losing.
     
  17. loyalyolayal

    loyalyolayal Gold Belt

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    I got over it really quickly.
     
  18. SummerStriker

    SummerStriker Black Belt

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    Some people can't handle being subbed. I used to just sub them anyway and then feel righteous about them acting salty. Now, if people are blue belts or higher, I just don't sub them unless I know them really well. It is my belief that most people can't handle it and that it isn't worth the hard feelings. I'll get the position tight, and then transition and pull bottom so that they get a turn on top. We both would know what happened, but they aren't triggered by the fear that other people saw the tap.

    In general, it isn't worth it to me to dive into the psychology of BJJ students. I'd rather pass on by, not tapping people.
     
  19. Robocok

    Robocok Purple Belt

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    Too much ego to deal with it sounds like (from your partners). As long as you're not cranking shit or hurting people the tap makes everyone better.
     
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  20. SummerStriker

    SummerStriker Black Belt

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    You say that, but people take this shit seriously. The whole point of putting on a colored belt is to have one over on someone else. No gi people don't have half the mental problems.
     
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