Do you feel weird about adults who are dependant on their parents?

Steven_Universe

Steven_Universe

Banned
Banned
Joined
Jul 23, 2017
Messages
2,326
Reaction score
3
i have mixed feelings on this one.

I’m 28 now.

I left Home at 19 which i felt was an appropriate age. I needed my own space. I needed to be able to sleep with women and not sneak them up to my room with my mom and dad sleeping 10 feet away. I didn’t have an amazing relationship with my parents then but we have a great relationship since I left, ironically.

I did my undergrad and finished, i bought my first Condo a few years ago and im saving up for a real house now. I have a pretty awesome job but I’m always looking to do more.

To be honest those first few years in a bachelor apartment, drinking beers with my friends and popping Molly’s and hooking up with girls are the fondest memories of my life.

I would have had an easier time going to grad school or law school if I lived at home and just let my parents look after me, but I don’t think that’s ideal for personal growth. A lot of my coworkers are in their early 30s and still live with mom and dad and borrow their car.

Ironically I would want my own kid to stay at home and get all the help he needs to get ahead, but at the same time I don’t want to take away his fun and experience of independence.

There was a tv show about this Indian girl in Toronto who lived with her parents until her 30s and saved up 120 grand for a cash down payment. It’s a funny trade off. You can get further in life taking help from family i would say, but freedom has value of its own.
 
Spend as much time as possible with your parents in their later years. You'll regret it if you don't and that regret will haunt you for the rest of your life.
 
Steven_Universe said:
I left Home at 19 which i felt was an appropriate age. I needed my own space. I needed to be able to sleep with women and not sneak them up to my room with my mom and dad sleeping 10 feet away. I didn’t have an amazing relationship with my parents then but we have a great relationship since I left, ironically.
Click to expand...


For most this is true but I know a couple of guys who moved back home after college for a few years who got more pussy then almost any guy I knew who had there own place. These guys were savages bringing random girls back to their parents home and sacking away a shit load of money living rent free while saving up for a house.


Anyway the entire moving out at 18 is a recent development in human history. Its something that became big in the U.S. after WW2 when their was a lot of prosperity and continued to grow up until now which we are seeing the opposite trend as there are a lot of millennials coming out of college with a liberal arts degree that end up being a barista at Starbucks with 100k in debt. I know in Asian cultures they have much stronger family units.


I don't think there is a real good answer to this question, The fact that a survey said most Americans can't handle a $500 surprise bill is pretty fucking scary and maybe more should be saving money living at home.

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/most-americans-cant-afford-a-500-emergency-expense/
 
Been on my own since 19, im 26 now, my mom has helped me out here and there but we are talking about very minimal things if I'm running tight, I've never had to really depend on her tho, I've never borrowed anything more than $50.
 
bubbleboyjones said:
For most this is true but I know a couple of guys who moved back home after college for a few years who got more pussy then almost any guy I knew who had there own place. These guys were savages bringing random girls back to their parents home and sacking away a shit load of money living rent free while saving up for a house.


Anyway the entire moving out at 18 is a recent development in human history. Its something that became big in the U.S. after WW2 when their was a lot of prosperity and continued to grow up until now which we are seeing the opposite trend as there are a lot of millennials coming out of college with a liberal arts degree that end up being a barista at Starbucks with 100k in debt. I know in Asian cultures they have much stronger family units.


I don't think there is a real good answer to this question, The fact that a survey said most Americans can't handle a $500 surprise bill is pretty fucking scary and maybe more should be saving money living at home.

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/most-americans-cant-afford-a-500-emergency-expense/
Click to expand...
If you're in your twenties I don't see the issue here, past that you should always have at least $500 around for emergencies.
 
43 yoa, and i live in my parents basement- its cool, cause they let me stay out if i want-
 
WorldofWarcraft said:
Spend as much time as possible with your parents in their later years. You'll regret it if you don't and that regret will haunt you for the rest of your life.
Click to expand...

That’s a good response.

I visit my mom and dad every Sunday and we all spend holidays together. I also try to send home a piece of my end of year bonus every christmas. And whenever my dad needs anything I follow his instructions to a T.

But I don’t think we’d get along if I lived in their house 24/7.

My family is the type that doesn’t respect you if you can’t take on the weld and survive on your own. For better or worse.
 
There's nothing wrong with living in your parents basement late into your 30s. Don't let societal norms tell your otherwise.
 
I told my son that when he finishes high school, his choices are college, military, or get the fuck outta my house and go be a grownup.

I'd love to have him stick around but I honestly don't think it's good for him. The growth he's going to experience on his own out there is far more valuable than whatever money he'd save by staying at home.

Plus I know people that didn't move out til they were over 30, and you can really tell that it stunted their growth. Like they're 30 but they still think and act like they're 19.
 
My parents did something great about six years ago. Giving me an advance on my will so I could buy a small house instead of wasting my skrilla on an apartment. They're own words were "why should you wait until we die before you (get your shit together)". So now I live in a perfectly good home, and I am very happy.

But on the other hand, I now kinda feel monitored by my mom because now she thinks she can pop on over whenever she wants to like she owns the place. Making me hide the signs of my alcolism and everything.

But to answer TS question, it's OK to lean on your parents if they can help, and you need the help. I know a lot of grown ass men who doesn't deserve it though
 
Depends on the circumstances. I'm 27 and currently live with my parents. It's nice that I have a good relationship with them as an adult, because I sure as fuck didn't when I was younger.

Long story short, I was a fuck up. Lived on my own (with squatting and stints of being homeless) since I was 15. Moved back home when I was 20. I've gone out on my own a few times since then as well, but things haven't always been kind. But my relationship with my parents is much better now that I've gained some perspective and it's good to know that I never have to so helpless again.
 
BEER said:
Depends on the circumstances. I'm 27 and currently live with my parents. It's nice that I have a good relationship with them as an adult, because I sure as fuck didn't when I was younger.

Long story short, I was a fuck up. Lived on my own (with squatting and stints of being homeless) since I was 15. Moved back home when I was 20. I've gone out on my own a few times since then as well, but things haven't always been kind. But my relationship with my parents is much better now that I've gained some perspective and it's good to know that I never have to so helpless again.
Click to expand...

You being humble and honest about your experiences, successes and failures make you quite likeable in my opinion.

I wish you the best.
 
My sister asks our parents to babysit her kids a lot. Does that count?
 
Who the fuck am I to judge anyone else's life?
 
life is hard

do the kids have a stable childhood? parents are together? divorced? happy household? there are so many factors that go into a childs growth as a person. its unfair to judge people.
 
I moved out at 19 also. Since I was 17, the house just got to small for both my dad and me. I was barely ever home and when I was, my pops and I were at each other’s throats. Moving out was the best thing for our relationship. Now, my old man and me get along really really well.
 
Eh do whatever you want. I find it bizarre that some people care so much about what other people do.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Latest posts

Forum statistics

Threads
1,236,993
Messages
55,459,900
Members
174,787
Latest member
Freddie556

Share this page

Back
Top