Anyone else have an out of control teenage daughter?

MichiganMMA1978 said:
That's fucked up... sorry man..
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Thanks it really fucked me up at the time, and is probubaly the number one reason I stayed so anti drug my entire life. Even when I was partying super hard, it was alcohol only and would not be around anyone with drugs after that happened.

On the cutting, I had another best friend that had moved away for a few years in a similar situation (parent divorced went with one for a while) and moved back.

Came back a completely different person, but we went right back to being super close. This was right before what happened to Jeff.

Shane was into drugs pretty bad and I was always trying to get him off of them, with little help from other friends. They almost all smoked weed in our group besides me, I was still working out 4/5x week on health kick. Basically all my Group of friends was from sports and they all got into drugs.

Anyway Shane came back and was always cutting looking for attention.

Told him it was only for shock value and attention and he needed to stop that shit, it wasn’t impressing anyone.

So everytime he would cut to get attention I would too, like see no big deal, you aren’t fooling anyone.

It stopped after the 4th or 5th time after I derailed his attention grab by doing it too right there.
 
therealdope said:
Meh - I bet TS' step daughter says: "Fuck that, I'm not as stupid as that chick to get put in a foot locker.".
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Or too tough for it to happen etc.

Jeff was probubaly the toughest son of a bitch I’ve ever known. Great fighter.

Suprise and guns when you are fucked up can take down even the baddest of sombitches.
 
SmilinDesperado said:
That's when you tell her to 'dont do YOUR best. Do the best of somebody better'
<NoneOfMy>
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LOL - I fucking hate that line.

My wife always has that line ready to drop any time she might be culpable for something. I'm like, "do you think Usain Bolt showed up for track practice when he was 15, ran the 100m in 10.6, and said 'I'm doing my best', to which his coach in Jamaica responded, 'that's a wrap. Good luck in whatever you decide to do in life.' ?".
 
neverwas said:
emotional neglect maybe. it could be the rejection from the dad thats caused this to start if hes no longer in contact. but an assessment and formulation are the only way to start unpicking this, and you probably don't need me to say get it started as soon as.
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Abuse, neglect, and feelings of abandonment are potential triggers for BPD. BPD most definitely involves self harm, erratic behavior, and difficulty in relationships.

Could be something to look into TS. Self mutilation is pretty rarely a cry for attention. That's something people because they don't really understand mental illness. Harming yourself isn't normal, and getting to that point usually means there's some serious underlying issues.
 
Yorkist said:
This makes me appreciate my two step daughters a lot more. Never had an incident with either one.

If she's living in your house and she does that 'you're not my real dad' bullshit tell her 'this isn't your real house either' and kick her out.

Truth is you can't fix self destructive behaviour. You have to just cut them loose and let their survival instinct kick in or let them die.

She's exhibiting the behaviour to punish your wife, not you. Talk to your wife about it. If your wife is willing to cut her loose, do it ASAP. If your wife just wants you to put up with it, leave.

This is more a thread about your wife's bad behaviour than the kid's.
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You can't throw a 14 year old out on the street. Dunno why I'm stating something so obvious.
 
MichiganMMA1978 said:
All I get is fuck off you're not my dad. Is day to day on whether the wife can talk about problems with her.
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What about "hey whats up im wrong to tell you how to live but i want to get to know you better and for us to have a good relationship since i do love your mom and care for you".
 
smooth assassin said:
Enjoy it while you can, and leave nothing behind. having kids is more rewarding and beautiful then anything I’ve ever had in my life, with that said, I wish I spent my days before being a dad differently and lived my own way
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I'm 44 so it's probably not going to happen, and i'm fine with that. That's cool that it's rewarding for you though.
 
Mike said:
You can't throw a 14 year old out on the street. Dunno why I'm stating something so obvious.
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No but she can go live with a friend's family or with her dad. Even just the threat of it, if she can't find anyone to take her in will be a wake up call.
 
Yorkist said:
No but she can go live with a friend's family or with her dad. Even just the threat of it, if she can't find anyone to take her in will be a wake up call.
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Solving complex behavior and personality problems is a little more complicated than that.
 
Worst I have seen was a 14 year old who was whoring around town, getting morning after pill all the time and slinging drugs. While dating a 19 year old parolee.
 
I have a 16 year old and she is as good as I could have hoped. Great grades, good head on her shoulder. We live in a upper middle class town and the way girls talk to their parents is disturbing. These liberal parents are the worst parents ever. They get treated like shit because they would rather act like a friend than a parent. These kids have no respect for authority. Girls are the worst. My daughter knows better to talk to me or my wife like that.
 
Mike said:
Solving complex behavior and personality problems is a little more complicated than that.
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Kids of divorce acting out isn't complex. She's just a spoiled brat with an over indulgent mother.
 
Horse Style said:
What did you do to the 19 year old?
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I didn't do shit. He was not in my city and I could not prove any crime with him.

She was a runaway and I just got her back home. Told dad he needed to crack down like hell. Dad looked like he had PTSD after going through her text messages and social media.
 
Thread is asking for trouble knowing the dirty pricks on this board!
 
Yorkist said:
Kids of divorce acting out isn't complex. She's just a spoiled brat with an over indulgent mother.
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It isn't like there was a recent divorce. From what he said that divorce is more than a decade in the past .

Self mutilation isn't run of the mill teenage acting out.
 
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